ADHD After Dark
ADHD After Dark is the unfiltered podcast where a group of hilarious dudes with ADHD gather to talk about anything and everything that comes to mind. Brace yourself for an explicit and comedic rollercoaster ride, as we dive into the depths of randomness, pushing the boundaries of humor and edginess.
In each episode, we unleash our unapologetic, off-the-cuff banter, sharing outrageous stories, wild adventures, and side-splitting anecdotes that will keep you laughing throughout the night. No topic is off-limits for us—whether it's outrageous personal experiences, taboo subjects, or exploring the more intimate and risqué aspects of life, we bring a refreshingly audacious and humorous perspective to it all.
ADHD After Dark is your escape from the mundane and predictable. Join our crew as we navigate the uncharted territories of comedic chaos, reveling in the freedom to explore the untamed corners of our minds. We embrace the spirit of After Dark, where the content can get explicit, sexual, and edgy—pushing boundaries and challenging social norms with a healthy dose of laughter.
While we may not always offer informative insights, we guarantee an uproarious time filled with absurdity, spontaneous conversations, and unabashed humor. It's a podcast that's not afraid to go where others won't, creating an inclusive space for individuals who enjoy unfiltered comedic escapades.
So, grab a drink, kick back, and immerse yourself in the unapologetically hilarious world of ADHD After Dark. Warning: explicit content ahead—tune in at your own risk, but be prepared to laugh your way through our zany adventures, spontaneous tangents, and unabashedly funny discussions that defy convention. Welcome to the wild, comedic chaos of ADHD After Dark.
ADHD After Dark
S4 E1: Kum Kakes
Ever wondered what happens when you mix family chaos, unconventional anniversaries, and a touch of vodka? Let’s just say it’s as unpredictable as a morning grooming mishap that leaves you looking like a hairless wonder. This kickoff to Season 3 starts with the hilarity of juggling family FaceTime calls during a grocery run and segues into the light-hearted celebration of a "deafiversary," proving that humor is the best companion for life’s toughest moments. We even ponder the unlikely pairing of Wolverine and an X-Men 3 t-shirt – because why not add a dash of superhero flair to the mix?
But hold onto your MRI machine – things take an unexpected twist when a woman discovers the shocking effects of bringing a butt plug into a scan room, only to realize it's not entirely silicone. Picture the magnetic mayhem and the awkward explanations to follow, all wrapped in a layer of dark humor that will leave you wide-eyed and chuckling. If that’s not enough, we share tales of public escapades involving unconventional accessories, blending disbelief with laughter in a way that only we can.
As the journey unfolds, we stumble into the realm of quirky subcultures, from furries and their fursonas to TikTok's book fandom and a cat hilariously high on catnip. The stereotypes are as amusing as a Venn diagram about furries' interests, and our reflections on conventions provide both humor and insight into these unique communities. Add some digital mischief and a dash of holiday-themed dark humor, and you've got a whirlwind of topics that promise to entertain and provoke thought in equal measure.
Twitter - https://twitter.com/DarkAfterAdhd
You're yelling.
Speaker 2:Go Murky. Yeah, we're live, we're recording. We're here Season 3, episode 1. I pooped in the corner, did you? Murky's celebrating an anniversary.
Speaker 4:Actually me and Murky are both celebrating an anniversary.
Speaker 5:Yeah, same. I was going to go to the store and get some chicken broth so we could finish, so we could do dinner last night, of course, and my sister decided to start a facetime call right as I'm about to walk out the door. I'm like fuck. So I grabbed my phone, joined in facetime and it's her and her fiance, Me and my fiance and my sister-in-law and we're waiting on my brother and just waiting and waiting or sitting there talking. I'm like I got my jacket on, I got my shoes on. Like the truck is running, let's fucking move this along here. They're like oh, let's all do a shot for mom. I was like, well, so I just grabbed the bottle. It's Angel's Envy that Miz gave me, actually for my birthday last year. So I took the top off that and poured myself a shot and I was like I'm ready, let's do it. And they just keep making small talk. I'm like fuck. So eventually we're like alright, well, my brother's not coming, he must still be at work. Let's all take this shot. So we take shot. All right, Love you mom, whatever, I love you guys.
Speaker 5:Later Hang up the phone 15 seconds later because I had taken my jacket off. I put my jacket back on and my phone's going off again to join back on the FaceTime. Call everybody. My brother's like yeah, I'm like five minutes from the bar. I'm like I hate it. I fucking hate it here so much. So we waited. He got to the bar, took another shot and I'm like fucking great, Thank God. Now I'm buzzed to go to the fucking corner store to grab chicken broth.
Speaker 1:You're not American if you're not buzzed up at the corner store, though.
Speaker 2:Stupid. What did your sister say the other day to you?
Speaker 1:oh uh, she she.
Speaker 5:She sent a group text yesterday morning and said happy deafiversary everybody. We should all get together and make sure we can have like you know, we should get dinner together or something like friday, because that's when my brother gets back in town, and I just thought happy death anniversary was a interesting term your family takes it so well, murky, hey, hey, we're rolling it oh it's all the alcohol helps cope. My sister just took a shot of straight vodka and I'm like who does that? Russians, I've done straight vodka.
Speaker 2:I've done a shot of straight vodka. It's pretty good. Willingly, do you want to do it? It was really good, was it?
Speaker 3:whipped cream vodka. No, it was just fucking vodka.
Speaker 2:It was probably the expensive stuff because it was rich white people giving me vodka, so it probably tasted pretty good.
Speaker 1:I wouldn't know what that's like oh my god, there's boobs.
Speaker 4:Murky's face.
Speaker 2:Fucking crazy.
Speaker 6:So E the story about somebody holy fuck e beardless yeah, it was a complete accident because I put on the wrong trimmer and didn't realize because I had, like, just woken up, went to the bathroom, put the uh, the guard on the trimmer which looks identical to like my close bodyguard for the trimmer, and just went notice half my mustache was gone and I was like well fuck.
Speaker 1:So what actually happened is, I had shaved my balls right before that and didn't take the card.
Speaker 6:God damn it. I knew it.
Speaker 2:Oh shit, um speaking of weird stories, uh, uh, e you want to explain?
Speaker 6:yes, so I heard this story and looked it up. It's completely true and it's messed up and I'm surprised this woman didn't die. So here's a question for everybody in this chat uh, and listeners, be it at home, work, wherever the fuck you're listening we know we know you're not listening to it at work we know you far huh you've done this
Speaker 6:before you've done this before but what are you not supposed to have around? An MRI machine, anything metal, correct. Anything that is a magnetic metal. Because people can you know what we're going to give? Three points to Coco.
Speaker 1:I guess if it's aluminum it wouldn't matter.
Speaker 2:I mean, don't they still? Isn't that why they use titanium and stuff in legs? Because people can still get MRIs and stuff.
Speaker 6:I believe. So I'm not 100% sure, but I'm also not.
Speaker 2:If you have a titanium rod in your leg, you can still get an mri, because it's not gonna shoot out of you, because it's not like magnetic like fucking wolverine yeah you go into the fucking, it just goes oh, that was my arm.
Speaker 5:And it turns into jelly speaking of wolverine nice, uh, x-men 3 t-shirt though, and it turns into jelly, and it turns into jelly.
Speaker 1:Speaking of Wolverine, nice X-Men 3 t-shirt though.
Speaker 6:Oh yeah.
Speaker 5:That is nice.
Speaker 6:So there was this woman. If I remember correctly, she was young 20s when I was reading the story. That sounds about right.
Speaker 6:Was she from Florida I don't remember the state Did she have a hoo-ha piercing? She had a butt plug in. She went oh yeah, and she had a butt plug in. However, she thought it was completely silicone so she was gonna get her rocks off while being inside the mri machine. Now I've heard people will just walk around and have butt plugs in, like I heard the chance of you just like being in a crowded place. There's like, I think, less than a 10 chance that at least one person has a butt plug in around you yeah, I mean there's but less than 10 chance that our work, that somebody has a butt plug.
Speaker 6:Oh, I'm almost 90% sure it's Ryan, but no way, it's Zeno. Zeno's too vanilla.
Speaker 2:He won't even let me kiss him.
Speaker 1:I do like tails.
Speaker 3:Yeah, he's into tails. You know how tails attach butt plugs.
Speaker 6:It do be butt plugs or tape so, uh, but this one's well, I mean that is like it's almost instantly means like backdoor access, you know it's like I wish murky would put in a tail for me, but he won't do it, he won't.
Speaker 5:you'd lose it forever in the cheeks, that's true.
Speaker 1:I'd have to get him the extra long tail, because a normal tail is like way bigger butt, fuck.
Speaker 2:Yeah, did you know that he modeled Venom's ass off of him.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and Susan Storm, it's not that other chick that's circling the internet, it's Murky's ass.
Speaker 5:I went to a con where they let you make fucking uh like henta voices for them and shit, and they're just like can we, can we put some of these like little uh probes on your butt? I was like how much you gonna pay me? And they're like here's tickets for tomorrow and I was like I'll be out of town. But yes, I won't be here but I will take those tickets I sold them outside later for a pack of six and five dollars. I believe that yeah, I won.
Speaker 1:A win is a win, a win is a win, yeah, anyways anyways.
Speaker 6:Uh, that butt plug was not 100 silicone, because most will have like either a piece of plastic or a little tiny piece of metal to kind of keep things stabilized, so that way metal core.
Speaker 5:Yeah, so she did not get her rocks off she went in head first.
Speaker 6:That machine went on. It went from her rectum up to her chest and she almost went ass to mouth anyone want to guess how fast that butt plug went?
Speaker 1:the speed of blank real quick the speed of magnetism and it made me think of you guys. Ever read Gary Oak Twitter? Yes, I remember that, it's fucking hilarious. And one that I remember fondly is he's posted made a porno with the redhead chick from uh team rocket gonna call it ass to meowth that's funny, yeah but anyways, shot like a bullet through her organs speed of sound.
Speaker 2:You're absolutely right.
Speaker 6:It was no shit you know I was like no way. That's how fast it went from her anus all the way up to her chest and somehow she survived how many organs did?
Speaker 1:it rip through, yeah I was gonna say it had to have like punctured.
Speaker 6:Yes, it said it punctured through several organs, but it didn't really specify which ones in the it was just all of them.
Speaker 4:I can't imagine you would be able to process what really happened.
Speaker 2:I'm pretty sure the MRI team saw something catastrophic. They saw it happen in real time. They probably did. They were looking at the MRI and they were like she's got a hole in everything. Something catastrophic. They saw it happen in real time. They probably were looking at the MRI and they were like she's got a hole in every fucking chest.
Speaker 5:Why does her?
Speaker 2:stomach, liver and intestines all have a hole in them. And also, why is her intestines now next to her heart? It's mother daddy.
Speaker 4:I don't like that. It's mother hi daddy
Speaker 6:that's not what she said you gotta go and say that I did say it's mother, mother but uh, yeah, yeah, that was a interesting thing to read today and like at first I just thought it was just going to be pulled out of her butt and it was going to be like a tee-hee sort of story.
Speaker 2:If she went and asked first that's what would have happened.
Speaker 6:Yeah probably, oh, absolutely, or I would hope so.
Speaker 3:Or it could have shot through her pelvis.
Speaker 6:But yeah, no, just to read that. Yeah, no, it shot straight up into her chest. My jaw was on the floor. That is pretty crazy.
Speaker 3:Do you think, when it punctured her lungs, she could smell her own ass?
Speaker 2:Maybe briefly. I'm pretty sure she might have just been instantly unconscious from the sheer amount of pain that she probably just felt.
Speaker 1:Maybe I mean Because I imagine I would take your body a little bit of time to process the pain.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you're not going to smell it, that's for sure. Your brain's going to immediately throw out that sense.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's going to be like a bad thing happening, don't know why. Where come from inside. Oh no, she's lucky. It didn't like shoot into her chest and then out her chest.
Speaker 6:Like she's lucky didn't hit her heart.
Speaker 1:Yeah. It's like come through like a speeding bullet.
Speaker 2:Yeah, she would have been.
Speaker 1:Imagine having to explain that to people then too.
Speaker 2:Could you imagine like she came in for a routine surgery and or routine like thing and somebody drove her and then they have to go out and explain that she had passed away in the mri machine because a butt plug shot her heart because a butt plug shot her heart I would actually love to be that doctor I don't know.
Speaker 2:I don't know like honey, you're not gonna fucking believe what happened at work today like yeah, but imagine having to go tell like the family that's waiting for her to come out alive he'd have to be like. So yeah, we took your daughter for an MRI.
Speaker 5:I signed this paper that she didn't have anything metallic. She did sign this paper that she didn't have anything metallic. She did sign this paper that she didn't have anything metallic in her.
Speaker 2:Well, unfortunately that wasn't true.
Speaker 1:The lie detector test determines that was a lie. She's no longer with us.
Speaker 2:Cause of death Her heart is now a butt plug. Her heart is now a butt plug.
Speaker 5:The ultimate penetration ripped through your intestines into your chest. What?
Speaker 2:would you go through your mind if you heard that like maybe the butt plug?
Speaker 6:if it went for that.
Speaker 2:No, no, no like if you heard, if you heard that, that your uh like daughter died because she had a butt plug in an MRI machine and it fucking punctured her heart like what would be your thought.
Speaker 1:I would feel so uncomfortable.
Speaker 6:Yeah, it'd be uncomfortable, but I think it'd be more sad.
Speaker 1:Yeah, like the initial reaction would be the grief.
Speaker 4:Do you think there's a Karen out there that says do you think there's?
Speaker 2:a Karen out there that says you guys should have X-rayed her first to make sure.
Speaker 1:Oh yeah absolutely there's going to be people there like they could have done something to make sure it wasn't in there. It's like no, you probably just shouldn't have a fucking butt plug in your fucking ass when you're going for an MRI.
Speaker 2:What are you drinking?
Speaker 1:It is a butter pecan cream soda. We'll look see there.
Speaker 4:Does that say, cum cake?
Speaker 1:It says crumb cake Did you?
Speaker 2:just say cum cake. Well, that's what I read on the camera Zeno's drinking cum cake. That's what we're calling it now it's cum cake. Now You're cum cake, I'll come on your cake.
Speaker 5:They call them cum cakes instead of cream pies. Now.
Speaker 3:Oh no, that's what we call it with I'll come on your cake.
Speaker 1:They call them cum cakes instead of cream pies. Oh no, what the fuck, that's what we call it with you, merky.
Speaker 4:Cause you ain't got no fucking pie back there. You got a fat ass cake, dude.
Speaker 2:Oh, fucking Christ.
Speaker 1:You heard it here first If you have a fat ass, you're getting fucking cum cake.
Speaker 2:Oh, I hate it here, I fucking hate it here this is the kind of shit that the listeners have been missing out on for the past several months we've been being bombarded by two people for the last couple of months Farha and Munition yeah, munition, he wanted to be on the podcast he wanted to be on the podcast tonight. Wanted to be on the podcast tonight. I forgot. I don't know how to contact him outside of stream whoops.
Speaker 1:You know, if he wanted to be here, you would have figured out a way to be here. Right, he would have absolutely been here. Yeah right, fake fan fake fan right there.
Speaker 2:Fake fucking fan. Fake fan oh, jesus. Christ starting 2025 strong god damn it. Munition, god damn it. Do you see the?
Speaker 1:Fake fan. Oh, jesus Christ, starting 2025 strong, god damn it. Munition God damn it Did you see, the he's probably out fucking playing hockey or plowing ladies or something.
Speaker 2:Wow, what a cool guy, big old dick, energy yeah, is he giving cupcakes? He's absolutely giving cupcakes.
Speaker 3:Berkey are you okay.
Speaker 2:Your face just turned so white when I said that oh, my cupcakes makes me laugh.
Speaker 5:That's funny, that's funny.
Speaker 2:I wonder what happens if you go to Pornhub and search cupcakes.
Speaker 5:I won't.
Speaker 6:You know, what Coco Go ahead, Do that. Someone's got to do the research. Someone's got to do the research we.
Speaker 1:Is Pornhub legal in Michigan? Still, I'm not in Michigan. It's not in Indiana. It's Illegal in Indiana.
Speaker 3:Are you fucking kidding me?
Speaker 1:You have to use an ID.
Speaker 2:You know, nobody's gonna do that.
Speaker 4:Sucks for all the senators, though, who can't get their porn.
Speaker 1:Only the Indiana ones. They're too busy fucking jerking off to a picture of donald trump I can tell you it's legal in illinois let's see what we get.
Speaker 6:Look at that blue station. People gotta eat the first epic.
Speaker 2:The first fucking video that pops up is Jesus Christ the first video that pops up is Jesus Christ.
Speaker 1:I'm hesitant to tell you to share your screen because I want to know, but then I'm not sure. I want to know.
Speaker 2:I'm going to send a screenshot to the fucking ADHD.
Speaker 6:After dark chat Alright okay, just take a look. Oh, hot tuna three week, nice and sloppy yum step bro.
Speaker 5:This cake is so good. What did you put in it?
Speaker 2:if you want to think as you can turn around.
Speaker 6:I love the I love the I love the very sparkly bottle there.
Speaker 3:Oh shit.
Speaker 5:Hawk tour, hawk tour. Hawk tour I am not disappointed.
Speaker 4:This is where the new season's going guys.
Speaker 5:Squirt's going in the first 20 minutes, are you?
Speaker 1:gonna go watch the fucking Doppler rain.
Speaker 2:I'm just saying.
Speaker 5:I watched the music video for Dick in a Box it's my dick in a box that's like.
Speaker 2:It's my cum in a cake that's catering to the average American person right there Fucking big old fat ass with a stepsis fucking fantasy.
Speaker 6:Speaking of which I remember there was a conversation I did want to have with you guys. Oh, no, okay, I'm waiting, coco.
Speaker 2:I am very confused how this transitions to speaking of.
Speaker 5:I was thinking about something.
Speaker 2:Let's go, let's hear it.
Speaker 1:ADHD doesn't have a reason.
Speaker 6:Yeah, there's no rhyme or reason.
Speaker 2:I can't wait for Farha I can't wait for Farha to read this chat later and be like what the fuck.
Speaker 4:What the fuck is that?
Speaker 5:But I would, but I wouldn't you better bore him not to have the kids in the room, to be fair that chat should just be assumed not to open anywhere, not to have anywhere, not safe. If you're hearing this, it's your own fault. I got this, I know how to solve this.
Speaker 2:You're just going to make him want to see it more by posting more things.
Speaker 3:Dude, this game is dark.
Speaker 2:Oh, the game that we wanted to buy.
Speaker 3:I can make this streamer take drugs before she streams. It says side effects makes the user kind of floppy.
Speaker 6:Oh, my what.
Speaker 2:Is that this is the game that was rated M, wasn't it? That makes sense.
Speaker 1:That just reminded me of those like old uh commercials that were like the ad campaign of when the guy melts into the couch yeah, they're like, just like that reminds me of christmas before she started smoking the weed.
Speaker 2:Yeah, dude, right, fucking. My cousin definitely went out and smoked some fucking weed with his friend um and my sister sister. At one point we're in their mansion, right, their fucking goddamn $2 million house, their castle, yeah. And they come back. My sister just leans over to me and she's like, does enter your cousin's name here? Look like he's smoked weed. And I was like yeah, and then I passed it to Gaz and Gaz just looks at me and she's like I kind of figured that based on how his friend over there looks like he's melting into the couch like one of those old commercials yeah the one where the guy just melts.
Speaker 2:He was just sitting there and just like, became the couch. He was Cade.
Speaker 1:Dude, I thought Cade was dead the other day. Boy was laid out, sprawled out on my bathroom floor, eyes wide open, staring at the wall, laying on his side. Didn't move um until I touched him and he was like, oh hey, dad, what the fuck is up dude was high as a fucking kite.
Speaker 1:I gave him one of those uh catnip like it's look in the shape of a little mouse and has a little ribbon on it and he was playing with it. Bro got fucking stoned out of his mind, didn't know where he was, what he was doing. I had to scoop him up and take him to bed and he was out the rest of the night.
Speaker 1:I thought he was dead laying on the bathroom floor he never just lays in the middle of the bathroom floor like at most he'll lay in front of the heat register, but he was just like right in front of the doorway. I was like oh my god, he walked in here and fucking died right here in the middle of the floor. I was like media heart attack, panic, anxiety spike and then he was just fucking stoned. I was like okay, but whoo, it was. Uh, it was exciting.
Speaker 2:Back to ease conversation.
Speaker 1:Taking that slight detour, that never happens on this podcast.
Speaker 6:But, digressing back to where we were going with like kinks and stuff, I did bring up to you guys in the ADHD after dark chat that I wanted to know who's worse Furries, book girls or monster fuckers. Did you say book girls?
Speaker 1:book girls.
Speaker 3:I think he said book talk girls all right, let's let's start over what we said, because probably not going to be a thing soon.
Speaker 6:But yeah, it's basically tiktok girlies or tiktok book girlies, um as we are in the presence of a monster so I think, no, no, no, we're keeping it in because I did a lot of research on this stuff and it gets deeper than what I expected are you worse than a monster?
Speaker 1:do you have to?
Speaker 5:do the fucking, or is it like? Can it be from a female perspective, like I want monsters to fuck me that's actually a thing that's gonna get brought up, uh-huh. So if you will divert, your attention, he's like I hear like who's his screen share now what the fuck?
Speaker 2:we got a Venn diagram is that like I said it somehow got worse.
Speaker 6:So my original thing was like okay, who has to be worse? Right, so we have furries.
Speaker 2:Oh, now I gotta upload this fucking video somewhere, do we just?
Speaker 1:We can post the Venn diagram on Twitter or whatever.
Speaker 2:Yeah but it's going to be way funnier if they get our reactions while it's happening.
Speaker 1:So when is Ronnie coming back?
Speaker 2:You opened up the can of worms. When is Ronnie coming back?
Speaker 6:Probably sometime at the end of this month.
Speaker 2:Nice. Well, you've been missing the ronnie, especially now that you've showed off some new artwork I mean, have I shown up new, oh, I guess the profile picture, yeah and uh, I didn't know. You were making new art, by the way, but I was talking about the maid oh, the maid this are you getting new artwork from ronnie?
Speaker 6:not ronnie now. Oh, all right. Uh, the other thing was book talk girlies, and since I didn't want to dox any tiktok book girlies that I knew, uh, I went with one of their husbands.
Speaker 2:Fucking Christ.
Speaker 1:Oh gee, millie, oh Jesus.
Speaker 6:And then, of course, we have the monster fuckers. Let me get that.
Speaker 2:I'm expecting this. I'm expecting this to be me.
Speaker 3:Oh wait, that's just horrifying a book, talk girly no, his wife, his wife is that's true look at that face, he looks like he has to shit.
Speaker 2:Did you have this already, like before we came on the podcast as a bit? Yeah.
Speaker 3:Jesus fucking Christ, I love E Remember when. I was like is there like a plan for the stream? And you were like no, there is.
Speaker 2:Well, I didn't have a plan.
Speaker 6:The thing is, I'm either winging it or I have a plan. This is a little bit of both. I have this prepared, but also not planned at all. Here's the question for you guys Individually what do we know about these things, Starting with furries? What do we know about furries? They're autistic.
Speaker 4:Autistic.
Speaker 3:They like stuff in their butt. Good answer, good answer. Oh, a throwback All right.
Speaker 6:What else do we know? That was my contribution.
Speaker 1:Tails, they have fursonas.
Speaker 6:Fursonas.
Speaker 1:Very good, very good Butt stuff yeah, good answer. Good answer tails, they have fursonas. Fursonas very good, very good butt stuff.
Speaker 6:Yeah, good answer they do enjoy butt stuff from my understanding okay murky, what do you know about furries?
Speaker 5:uh, helmets, what? Whenever I go to a con, they always have have the big old, we're gonna auto correct that the first suit, first suit, yeah, all right no, I mean he used his prior knowledge of what he had.
Speaker 6:He's been to conventions before and he's seen the helmets for sale, so he's like connecting.
Speaker 5:No, no, not for sale people just wearing around helmets and then like maybe like a chest plate and just going like that or full out or they'll have just like the helmet and like the hands yeah exactly yeah, ian, I saw, uh, some furries at a con and one of them had a leash on the other one I would.
Speaker 6:That was very interesting.
Speaker 2:I want to put a leash on murky and go to a con and see what happens. Actually, coco and gas were there too.
Speaker 5:Yeah, that was the uh doki dokan I, I stare sometimes like I can't help myself.
Speaker 6:The fuck what a four-year-old child with dwarfism for the first time what was that face?
Speaker 1:uh, we gotta snag a picture of that on the recording. Coco make, make a bookmark of that you know, we don't edit uh what? We can go back and look at the recording, though. Oh, you're just recording audio.
Speaker 2:I'm recording both, but, like right now, I had e full screen so I didn't get the polygamy.
Speaker 1:Oh damn it what?
Speaker 5:That's a big word for me.
Speaker 1:That's a big word for Elmo Can we get the dictionary out on that All right.
Speaker 6:So let's move attention, let's go, let's go clockwise, let's go to monster fuckers.
Speaker 1:What do we know about monster fuckers? What was the last word on the furry one? Polygamy, polygamy, multiple partners, alright monster fuckers.
Speaker 3:I know nothing so what do we mean by monster fuckers like bitches with like tentacle dildos or bad dragon enjoyers oh, so they're like uh, they're
Speaker 1:like um the avipositor bitches yeah every dnd campaign horrific beings.
Speaker 6:I don't think you know they like the scary things, like they'll see some eldrific beings. They like the scary things, they'll see some eldritch horror and be like would Wait.
Speaker 3:Are we monster fuckers? Wait, wait.
Speaker 2:Chris Redfield.
Speaker 3:Isn't Meg in love with Danny? Does that make her a monster fucker?
Speaker 6:Who's Danny and who's Meg?
Speaker 3:Oh, am I not allowed to say names?
Speaker 1:Whoops. I know who you're talking about.
Speaker 4:yeah, oh well.
Speaker 6:I don't. I'm genuinely confused, okay.
Speaker 3:You know, you might have to explain it to me later, because I genuinely have no idea so that person loves ghost face who they refer to as Danny and you just said, horrific beings so I would actually list that in book talk girlies that's not a book, it's a movie so maybe that's between monster fuckers ooh, is that like shared?
Speaker 1:it's like in the middle of the venn diagram yeah, when you take a book and you add monster fuckers to it, it makes a movie.
Speaker 5:It makes fucking scream, but like scream where they make it a porno. So now book talk girl it's called moan.
Speaker 1:Sex.
Speaker 6:Sex. Book talk, yeah, book talk Sex. They enjoy sex.
Speaker 2:Door stuff, door play, door play.
Speaker 5:Door stuff goes in the center of all of them.
Speaker 2:Door stuff is in the center of all of them. I guarantee you that furries don't have the mental capacity to do door stuff. Who doesn't?
Speaker 1:Furries? I don't know.
Speaker 3:I think they do Coco you're autistic, so you're like halfway to being a furry.
Speaker 2:And you've done door stuff.
Speaker 3:I'm pretty sure Put in between furry and book. Talk, coco. I'm pretty sure Put in between furry and book talk Coco.
Speaker 6:I'm pretty sure.
Speaker 5:I'm pretty sure. I'm basically a furry without a fursuit.
Speaker 3:Sometimes I envision myself as the spirit of a wolf. I did buy that tail that one time and Coco said he'd use it. But it's John Norris. I played a wolf in.
Speaker 6:Pocahontas have you ever heard the blue corn moon? Stupid motherfucker so, now that we've got this groundwork laid out, uh-huh, this is where I'm gonna take a little bit more control, because you guys have hit a few of the points that I've wanted to hit. But what we're gonna start? We're gonna start in between furries and monster fuckers. Now, if you really think about it, what these two things share in common the most for porn addiction is a sense of something different, something so other worldly role play.
Speaker 3:They all share role play wanting to fuck you am I the one wanting to get fucked there?
Speaker 6:yes, you're wanting to be fucked by the level of legs and feet shown in that.
Speaker 5:Coco, yes, you're trying to get dick down. Excellent, absolutely trying to get dicked down. Excellent, absolutely trying to get dicked down.
Speaker 1:Are you also trying to get dicked down in this photo?
Speaker 2:I mean he was the one taking down.
Speaker 5:He has, he has he did socks and shoes.
Speaker 1:Yeah, he does. Yeah, I see so you guys are going to do the come cake. Yes, yes, I see so you guys are going to do the cum cake.
Speaker 2:Yes, yes I see, I understand.
Speaker 1:Now Carry on.
Speaker 2:It's a cum carrot cake, cum carrot cake.
Speaker 1:For reference. This is a photo of.
Speaker 2:Coco and Ian meeting Farah in their carrot costumes. Good answer. Good answer, good answer, good answer, good answer Good answer Good answer Good answer.
Speaker 6:Now, what do book talk girlies and furries have in common? Well, I actually did a little bit of digging on this and it turns out, within their communities, by large, most of them, not all, most of them are all. Most of them are.
Speaker 1:What is this picture bottoms this is a picture of my bedroom. What?
Speaker 6:is the rest of this picture though it's so big it's so big that is America's ass, right there our bottoms. Now, what's the connection between book talk girlies and monster fuckers? That's kind of where I started to be like, okay, this is a little weird, this is a little different. This is a little different. Dragon smut, you're actually not that far off Fucking hobbit smut.
Speaker 2:Hobbit and dragon smut.
Speaker 5:Fantasy smut, magical smut.
Speaker 6:You're right there. It's fantasy, the thing that Coco can never get.
Speaker 2:I don't get it. There's a fantasy. Why can't he get fantasy? I don't get it.
Speaker 3:There's a fantasy. Why can't he get fantasy?
Speaker 2:I don't understand what's happening.
Speaker 1:I think it's just he can't get a kiss from me and it's like he desires it, so it's a picture of me. That's his fantasy.
Speaker 3:I get it now.
Speaker 6:Now, what do they all have in common? And, after a strenuous amount of research, the one thing I've noticed that all three of these really desperately want.
Speaker 2:What is this?
Speaker 1:Oh no, this is also my house.
Speaker 5:That's what he knows. I don't like that no.
Speaker 4:I don't know, Dude.
Speaker 5:I'm smashing the fuck out of that five layer dude. Oh, we got a little belly going on. There we go.
Speaker 1:I was nervous for a second because I was like this picture was also taken at my house it's not the fact that I could figure out which one was worse.
Speaker 6:It's the fact that I learned that all three of them really want a dominant figure. Furries really want a dominant figure to pick them up for uppies and other little plays. The love interest is normally a big, strong, masculine character and monster fuckers. They want a gigantic monster to go after them. Normally a big, strong, masculine character and monster fuckers. They want a gigantic monster to go after them.
Speaker 2:Gaz. Can you give me uppies, Uppies. That's what broke season three episode one, I hope, our ai picks up on that, not the uppies. Oh no, murky said I gotta pour me another one of those 100 proofs. This is fucking getting wild.
Speaker 1:This is funny I'm doing dry January.
Speaker 5:No, I remember why we're doing this. It brings joy and laughter to our lives.
Speaker 2:You're doing dry, aren't you drinking an alcoholic drink right now?
Speaker 5:No, it's just a cream soda. It's just a cupcake cream soda, dude. That's all nuts. That's all nuts.
Speaker 1:Made with real pecan.
Speaker 5:Yeah, pecan cream soda.
Speaker 2:Yeah, Our podcast is going to go wild tomorrow and it's going to get so many views. And then the fucking owner of that beverage company is going to be like why is our name trending? But it's come cake instead of.
Speaker 5:Whatever the fuck it actually is.
Speaker 1:They're like no, no, no. This is good for us remember what happened to twisted tea. We can make this work for us guys.
Speaker 2:Just change the name to come we're gonna have to fucking make a blue sky for fucking adhd after dark a what a blue sky.
Speaker 6:It's like the non elon version of twitter. Oh yeah, it's where everybody's made by the guy who made Twitter.
Speaker 2:It's by Jack Dorsey, right.
Speaker 4:Yeah.
Speaker 2:What is happening on this?
Speaker 4:Oh, what are you doing, are you just?
Speaker 2:cropping it to say sex with miles right underneath it.
Speaker 1:It would appear, so I think that's what's happening.
Speaker 2:So venn diagram, sex what is? What is what is happening? I'm very invested in this. I'm very upset that the viewers can't see this and I have to keep filling in the fucking dry space it's keeping me more engaged that he's not responding to us, to our questions.
Speaker 1:Yeah, he's doing the work and I need to know what is going to happen next.
Speaker 2:Gaz's mouth is just sitting there wide open.
Speaker 1:Yeah, gaz, how are you doing after that up-ease Sorry.
Speaker 3:I'm trying to multitask and you know undiagnose ADHD, therefore no medication.
Speaker 2:Mm-hmm, you can blame your mother for that one yeah, it's my mom's fault fuck your mom not like sex do I?
Speaker 1:I hate my life choices welcome to the podcast, july to be back.
Speaker 2:Oh, that is very funny oh, jesus christ, I can't believe he had a whole skit ready. I love it he was. He was ready for this. He was like all right, I'm good for adhd now um, so you guys gonna download, um what's it called?
Speaker 1:uh, red note. Uh, you, you have to pledge yourself to the communist party, but I'm good, you know thinking about it tiktok, I'm not gonna do that thinking about it
Speaker 6:I'm. I'm just gonna ride tiktok until it just dies and fries out.
Speaker 2:I'm just gonna start reading fucking fantasy, smart dude yeah, then I'm just gonna go back to fucking 4chan and and get all my horrible stuff from there yeah, I guess reddit's still around yeah reddit's still around, I'll go to the fucking watch people die sub page.
Speaker 1:Oh um, okay, all right. Well, yeah, that's the end of the episode. People die subreddits and one's just like a joking version.
Speaker 6:That's the one of the episode. There's two different why people die, subreddits and one's just like a joking version. That's the one that I'm actually on.
Speaker 2:No, I went to the one where I saw a guy get electrocuted and fall limp.
Speaker 4:I've seen those videos before oh.
Speaker 1:Yeah, he died. Yeah, instant, Instant kind In the automotive industry actually. They tell you like if you're disconnecting a hybrid battery on a vehicle, you do not depower it correctly and you get shocked. They legitimately tell you like there's a big fucking pole with a hook on it that shops have that you use to pull the person away from it, and they'll tell you point blank that person is dead. Nothing you do can or will save them. They are dead. All you can do is pull their body away from it to close the circuit, but you are not going to resuscitate them. They are dead the moment they touch that battery.
Speaker 6:Yeah, that's what our shop owner actually told me, because I brought in a hybrid car, was washing it and he was like hey, can I show you something? I was like sure he opens up the hood. He was like you see this orange thing here. Yeah, never touch that. You touch that, you are dead. You see anybody reaching for that. You stop them.
Speaker 4:Yeah.
Speaker 6:And yeah, he went on through this whole spiel about this one thick orange wire that even if just looking at it wrong, we'll just kill a man. Yeah, and I've never been afraid of an inanimate object more than I have.
Speaker 5:Yeah, we had a truck in the shop today that a guy came from it took. It ended up taking like seven hours because of the weather, but he lives roughly four hours from the shop and he's the head of the company's I don't want to say head, but basically the best guy available for the repair and engineering side of things and he came out. We got a truck in today. That's a brand new EV vehicle that apparently has a load of these fucking batteries in it. I didn't know that these trucks needed more than half a dozen EV batteries and I'm like if someone touches that wrong, they're gonna die.
Speaker 5:If you stick your hand in the wrong place, not knowing what the fuck you're around, you're gonna die.
Speaker 1:Yeah, if you stick your hand in the wrong place, not knowing what the fuck you're around. You're gonna die. They could send you to the fucking moon. Oh dude you're gonna feel like you're going to the moon yeah, you're not gonna feel anything you're just gonna, all of a sudden, it's gonna be night night forever you're gonna find out what's on the other side. You're gonna go welcome to hell you aren't mad that we didn't send you a christmas card, are you? He doesn't celebrate. You think I'm fucking religious? Fuck that guy. You're right.
Speaker 6:I don't know why I was worried man well, I mean, isn't christmas technically a holiday we stole from pagans? Yes, actually, if anybody was going to celebrate it, it would be Satan.
Speaker 4:Let's not give it a second thought. Is this the?
Speaker 1:thing we're learning today on the podcast.
Speaker 6:I have a generalized idea. Did you guys not know that Christmas is not a Christian holiday? I did not know that the trees and the decorations and the bright lights and all these things.
Speaker 5:It's a capitalist holiday. Yes, 100%, Every holiday is a capitalist holiday. Coco.
Speaker 2:Jesus is dead. Buy candy, You're not wrong. Here would you like this candy bar that is shaped like a cross and has a man nailed to it.
Speaker 1:I read that the reason we? I don't know if I've ever seen a candy bar that is shaped like a cross and has a man nailed to it. I read that the reason we? I don't know if I've ever seen a candy bar like that.
Speaker 5:Coco, when the fuck are you going to find me a candy bar like that?
Speaker 2:The autistic store you can find some weird shit.
Speaker 5:I went to the Bible shop and they had these crazy fucking crucifix chocolates.
Speaker 1:I read that the reason we exchange wedding rings and during proposals is because the diamond industry was like if your man really loved you, you would get you a diamond ring when he proposes.
Speaker 4:Yep, I got gas.
Speaker 5:I hope you're hearing this yeah, I am, I'm going to go tell fucking daddy here.
Speaker 3:I go tell daddy I guess my man doesn't love me. Then you told me what to get, because he got me exactly what I asked for.
Speaker 2:You told me what to get Same.
Speaker 1:I saw a TikTok today and actually told her boss that I was going to do it to a co-worker. And it's like when a co-worker approaches me and asks for help, I'm going to say not now, kitten, daddy's busy, oh, no does your work? Have an HR department?
Speaker 1:no he has to put his HR hat on. I told him I was like, hey, I'm going to do this to Ryan, and he looked at it and he goes yes, yes, please, that that would be great because he's gonna feel so uncomfortable just by design and why we probably should have an hr department 100. I'm just gonna look at him and be like not now, kitten daddy's busy. I feel like patrick would laugh.
Speaker 6:Oh, pat, he would be so confused.
Speaker 1:There was one day our office lady her name's Betsy. She's the sweetest lady ever.
Speaker 5:That sounds like the lady that's been there for like 40 years. She's been there for like 25 years.
Speaker 1:Hell, yeah, she was invoicing something and Patrick, one of the technicians, needed some, or I needed the paperwork. But he needed me to help him. And for me to help him I needed the paperwork. And so I was like, hey, when you're done with that, I'll take it. And patrick goes yeah, betsy, we're waiting on you. And she just like, quick as a whip goes, well, I'm working on it. So are you gonna stand there and wait like a good little girl? And I was like, oh damn, betsy, just straight up, fucking got you. And he was so stunned he was like, yeah, no, I'm gonna stand here and wait like a good little girl. Betsy, I'm sorry to have offended you or pushed you at all. I lost it. I was laughing so hard. I was like you made this sweet little lady fucking burn you like to a crisp bro.
Speaker 5:She's been waiting the last six years. Six years ago was the last time that happened and she got to say that exact same line.
Speaker 1:She denies that she said it. I was like you must have blacked out for a moment and like the bad half of your brain took over the dark side of Betsy and that came out. She's like I remember saying that me and Patrick are like you. Verbatim said that that's funny, it's good shit. It's good shit.
Speaker 2:Made me laugh it's like whenever I got you the other days, you know, not even trying fucking over here, like look at me with this 99 accuracy. Doesn't your character have auto aim it?
Speaker 1:does, it doesn't, it doesn't, it does and then we started.
Speaker 5:Murky was just like he fucking got you cloaking daggers got cloaking auto-aim is fire, fire, fire.
Speaker 6:I don't know anything about Marvel Rivals, but I'm just not a PvP guy.
Speaker 1:It is I enjoy it. I'm a Moon Knight main. I fuck shit up with Moon Knight.
Speaker 2:I wonder what I mean. Autism, Autism yes.
Speaker 1:He does do that.
Speaker 2:Speaking of funny, embarrassing stories, I just remembered one from Christmas.
Speaker 6:Okay, let's hear it.
Speaker 2:This is when Gaz was using the restroom oh no.
Speaker 4:Oh no.
Speaker 2:So the entire time we were at my parents, uh, she kept going to the bathroom downstairs because she was just afraid that, first off, she didn't know that their bedroom had a bathroom. So she was afraid, if she was in the bathroom, taking up all the time, that they weren't going to be able to use the restroom while she was there. So she kept going downstairs. You know, because I'm considerate, because she's considerate right right and she was also worried about the smell, because Wigovian stuff like that makes her poop smell a lot more.
Speaker 2:It doesn't smell that bad okay that's what you're worried about that's what she said.
Speaker 1:She's worried about.
Speaker 3:I don't poop as often but, like you know, I get backed up and like sometimes like that shit's been marinating for a minute.
Speaker 5:That shit happens when you're grown. But I've never. I've never fucking thought I was gonna die on a toilet until after I turned 30 I never thought I was gonna die on a toilet until I had to fucking have the ambulance
Speaker 4:I never thought I going to die on a toilet until I had to fucking have the ambulance.
Speaker 2:I never thought I was going to die on a toilet until the ambulance had to be called for me on the toilet.
Speaker 3:You know that did happen.
Speaker 6:And because of that I have now put my medical information on my phone.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah. Because, they can look at all of your medical information from your emergency screen. But anyway, so she was using the bathroom downstairs the whole time, except for the last day of the trip, because we were just about ready to head out.
Speaker 1:And then her worst fears were realized.
Speaker 2:Well, I mean, I kind of made it worse for her.
Speaker 1:Oh no.
Speaker 2:She was using the restroom and I'm sitting out there and I'm like, oh, it smells bad out here. So I so this piece of shit sends me a message. Let me finish this. You ignore those thoughts. I send Gaz a message while she's on the toilet. I go hey, are you pooping? She goes yeah, what I was like. It smells kind of bad out here. You should turn the fan on.
Speaker 1:So, then I'm sitting out on the couch, so then, I'm just sitting out on the
Speaker 2:couch and I hear the fan come on and I'm like oh, she heard it.
Speaker 4:She was like. She was like did they smell it?
Speaker 2:did they smell it? I was like I don't know. She was like well, why didn't you tell me? And I was like, well, I mean, somebody had to. I was laughing the whole fucking time.
Speaker 3:I believe the exact message said the stink is leaking out.
Speaker 5:Yeah, something like that oh no, you're a brave motherfucker dude. I'm autistic, it was funny maybe it's just stupidity and bravery, but god damn it, I respect it it makes for a great story and it was funny.
Speaker 1:If you can't joke around like that, then like yeah, I would probably do the same thing to Chris you know.
Speaker 5:Luckily there's no one else in this apartment, so I mean, it's not like.
Speaker 2:It's not like I went hey mom, hey stepdad, it smells like shit in here. She's pooping up a storm. At least I said, she's obviously shit in there at least I sent her a message to say, hey, you might want to turn the fan on, so it doesn't leak out here anymore, that's more considerate.
Speaker 5:The other day I just had to be like I can smell it in the hallway, and then Dusty got mad at me.
Speaker 2:What would have been, you know? What would have been really funny is if one of their neighbors went. One of your neighbors down below was like yeah, I can smell it down here too even I fucking killed you, and I'm pretty fucking funny though.
Speaker 5:Oh man, yeah, I can't say I don't think, I don't think I'm brave, I think I'm just stupid. I peeled the pain off of those walls.
Speaker 2:Dude, see, I was trying to be nice because she I knew she was super conscious about the smell reaching it out there and I was like maybe I smelled it first and I'll let her know to turn the fan on so that it doesn't escape out. They smell it more. But then I also remembered that I have a terrible sense of smell and they probably smelled it well before me.
Speaker 1:You should have done it Nah nah. Smelled it more. So then you took up all the smell. So the smell wouldn't get to them. So then you took up all the smell.
Speaker 2:So the smell wouldn't get to them. I don't think that's how fluid dynamics work.
Speaker 1:I actually saw a tick tock of a guy talking about that where he works at a fucking restaurant and he's a dishwasher and he's like, yeah, when I'm fucking back there washing the dishes, you know I'll fucking let them slip out every now and then if they smell bad, I try to sniff them up really fast. So the girls bringing the dishes, they don't have to smell that, because that's kind of gross and I'm like that's not how it works man, why Wish what?
Speaker 2:Oh no, I hope that was a joke. No, no, absolutely.
Speaker 1:This man is. He's also autistic. Well, he should. This man is, he's also autistic, and he should be smart.
Speaker 1:Then he's not I can't remember his name, it's like Gothic Cobra or something like that and he usually wears like a cowboy hat and he has glasses. And like he's always talking about how like his account is overdrafted. And he's like I don't even know how I fucking do this, how like his account is overdrafted. He's like I don't even know how I fucking do this, but my account's overdrafted. And then the next fucking clip is of him fucking door dashing a bunch of shit. He's like yeah, I called into work today and I just door dashed this food because I don't really feel like going anywhere. Um, so this is happening like one of his fucking um clips. He was like said he was at a bar and he was hitting on this chick and then her boyfriend started getting mad and he turned around. He's like, oh, okay, well, this dude's fucking autistic. I was like how are you this self-aware but also so fucking dumb?
Speaker 2:Oh.
Speaker 1:Jesus Christ.
Speaker 2:That's him.
Speaker 6:That's the guy, oh my.
Speaker 2:God dude.
Speaker 6:He knew exactly who you were talking about, because he sent me videos of this motherfucker I have.
Speaker 1:It's so, so awful. People send him glitter bombs all the time, like there was one clip of him. He's like, yeah, I'm not fucking opening this, I know it's obviously a glitter bomb and not fucking prequels and shit. And then the next po box that he got was like of cigars or something like that. It was cigars, I know. It was like hey, you're my YouTuber.
Speaker 1:I was in the fucking wherever across seas Like I found these really good quality cigars and I thought I'd send them to you. I smoked a couple myself and I was like I knew a guy like you would appreciate them. And he's like, yeah, you see, this is the fucking shit I'm talking about. I appreciate people like this. And he opens it up and it's a glitter bomb Fucking blows up in his face. Oh dude, he is something else he's always making, like the most horrendous food to like. He'll make steak and nachos and he'll like cook the steak in a frying pan. The steak in a frying pan that's like got grease in it from, like obviously, whatever else he's been cooking and then he'll dump the grease over like doritos and fucking eat this shit.
Speaker 2:I'm about to throw up. That's fucking awful yeah, it's so fucking gross I bet you it's got dust and shit in it too.
Speaker 6:What the fuck is that that is him holding a staff with his deceased pet mantis named mrs green glued to it I was about to ask did he fucking resin resonate in glue?
Speaker 1:yes, yes, he did uh, he's always talking about how much of a chick magnet he is too here are some popular quotes.
Speaker 6:According to his fans, this is my favorite I'm God's gift to vagina hey yo, that's your pickup, line Zito.
Speaker 1:God's gift to vagina. Yeah, I'm actually the bane of vagina's existence.
Speaker 4:Which cat is that?
Speaker 2:I can't tell Little.
Speaker 5:Little, little, not so little.
Speaker 6:This one sounds like if murky and cocoa combined into one body together. What um spill the tobacco.
Speaker 1:I feel an autistic freak out coming on we got the worst parts of me and murky the freakouts and tobacco addiction that the bolts playing dead by daylight go figure I mean, this guy kind of looks like if Coco and Murky got like mashed together.
Speaker 6:Apparently he's been arrested for public defection. Excuse me.
Speaker 1:That doesn't surprise me.
Speaker 2:That doesn't really surprise me at all.
Speaker 6:Oh.
Speaker 4:Jesus, is that blackface? Oh, my god.
Speaker 1:Looks like a fucking caveman.
Speaker 5:I feel like you just had a shower a few days ago without putting on this shot what like I don't know what's going on here.
Speaker 6:There's no description on this picture it just exists, he just a fucking cartoon and he opens up a fucking bomb.
Speaker 1:I don't like that. That's his mugshot, Dude.
Speaker 2:I see why he wears a hat now.
Speaker 4:That's like a forehead man.
Speaker 2:Dude, he's like almost conehead level there.
Speaker 1:He's an interesting person.
Speaker 2:You're an interesting person, he believes he is incredibly famous. I mean you know about him To an extent Everybody's an influencer Except me.
Speaker 5:You just influenced my blood. You know about them to an extent. Everybody's an influencer, yeah, except me you just influenced my blood there's a lot of influence that shouldn't be happening from people in this world. They're not smart enough to influence others like us yeah, you shouldn't be listening to us right, yeah what are you? Doing right now.
Speaker 1:I mean.
Speaker 5:I guess on a general scale we gotta be at least around like if you ranked it on like a D&D out of 20 rating.
Speaker 2:I mean considering you thought 10 was pretty fucking stupid Combined intelligence.
Speaker 1:Murky, we literally invented Tumcake earlier.
Speaker 5:Yeah, we did Because we're smart as fuck. And then we immediately made the biggest tag on Pornhub in like six days. Cum cake's gonna blow up, dude.
Speaker 2:Cum cake's fucking lit. What the fuck are you all talking about Everybody say cum cake, Cum cakes bitch.
Speaker 1:Cum cakes, dude. You would know if you were here, Farah.
Speaker 2:We all spell it wrong.
Speaker 5:You like the way I spell gum cakes?
Speaker 2:Yeah, we all spelled it differently. That's amazing. I'm just going to tell him.
Speaker 4:Go up that last pick looks like Zeno's.
Speaker 2:I'm just going to tell him go up. Wait, that last pick looks like Zeno's if he's in the chat, I'm going to say this.
Speaker 6:Farah's typing.
Speaker 2:Let's see now that I know he saw it, he's probably like god damn it. Now that I know he saw it, he's probably like God damn it, kennedy, avert your eyes you should not open this chat next to her. He should know that by now.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I'm sure he does.
Speaker 5:I'm sure he does. I'm on my way to the frogs to get LASIK tomorrow morning. Oh man, Well, there's some cake, I guess.
Speaker 1:Yeah, there's a cum cake for you, Farah.
Speaker 4:Yep.
Speaker 2:I wonder if he even noticed the dick in the fucking picture.
Speaker 1:I probably wouldn't have either.
Speaker 2:I had not known it was on.
Speaker 1:Pornhub.
Speaker 5:A cum cake oh.
Speaker 2:God, oh god, wait. So like that's the most solid hour of podcast entertainment I've ever heard in my life. Yeah, are we cutting that an hour? Are we gonna go a little longer? We, we done, we out what else, what else? We got here I don't know, I'm out of ideas.
Speaker 6:Fuck. Did he respond with a picture of his child. I don't know I get here that made me uncomfortable. Wait what he reacted with a picture of his child.
Speaker 5:Oh, jesus, god he just he really wanted. The side-eyed Mr Mime meme for the win. Oh boy.
Speaker 1:I think that's.
Speaker 2:Didn't this come off of like one of our episodes of ADHD After?
Speaker 4:Dark.
Speaker 2:This is where this fucking image came from it's the Mr Mime because we were watching the episode and we were like what the fuck?
Speaker 1:Yeah, that shit was wild.
Speaker 6:Yeah, because Ash was borrowing Mr Mime For a long time.
Speaker 2:It's been a while. How long have we?
Speaker 5:been fucking doing this for Well a couple years.
Speaker 2:I lived in Pittsburgh.
Speaker 6:Right? Was I still married or was I divorced by that?
Speaker 2:time you were divorced. You were definitely divorced.
Speaker 4:It was 2022.
Speaker 5:I'd rather refer to it as moving on to bigger and better things, growing, something I say.
Speaker 1:And showing Growth led you to cupcakes.
Speaker 6:Just remember, all of your life choices have led you to cupcakes.
Speaker 1:That includes you listener driving in your car on your way to your nine and five.
Speaker 2:Hey, listener, listener, listener. If there's a version of God.
Speaker 5:I have no idea how I'm going to explain cupcakes well, you have.
Speaker 2:You have jc's pizza. Go talk to him there, dude that pizza's so good but fuck, that was awkward man what happened. You gotta tell the story.
Speaker 5:I'm too autistic oh yeah, so Pogo was in town. Yep, whoever could make it made it out to Dusty's birthday thing at JC's Pizza. You guys were at the con down, or no? You were playing Shadowverse down. Yeah, down, a few towns down. And so we go to this place because it's a coal-fired fucking pizza and we heard some rumors it was really good, and so Hold on a second Kings.
Speaker 2:Oh fuck, king's doing stuff. Murky has to do things. Uh-oh, is he throwing up back there Seems like he's doing a little asthma dude, I wish I didn't have ADHD, it wasn't so autistic or I could explain this story way better. But but we're at this JC's pizza place because you know, I came in after they, they did all the scheduling stuff.
Speaker 3:I came in and my god what I think she has to cut herself to relieve stress.
Speaker 6:This game is so uh what well that took a sharp 180.
Speaker 4:Okay, what the fuck?
Speaker 2:It literally says self-destruct. Continue your story, Murky. I've got distracted by that.
Speaker 5:So you know, a bunch of people show up for Dusty's birthday at this pizza place. Come out, they get drink orders, see if we want any appetizers or anything, and the owner comes out who we did not know was the owner at the time and he comes up and puts his arm around like my dad. I was like, oh, my dad knows this person. And he starts talking to everybody. You know, I hope you guys are having a good time. Thanks so much for coming out here. Blah, blah, blah, blah. And I'm like, oh, like dad must know this guy.
Speaker 5:Not the case, Definitely not the case. He's like have you guys heard the story of how he came to be? And everyone said no, apparently, because we're not liars. And then we got a fucking 15-minute spiel about how this guy was working for a business, put everything he had into, it went bankrupt. The place went bankrupt. He lost everything. He was living in a hotel across the street. Me and Dusty had known about this guy through stories from a friend that he was one of the chefs living at this hotel for the business and how Jesus Christ fucking saved him and fucking now he owns this place and they only get the best ingredients from blah, blah, blah and the food is fire. But I did not sign up for a 20 minute, for a 20 minute church spiel.
Speaker 5:It was definitely trying to order what I was trying to order some drinks and some appetizers I was like.
Speaker 2:You were like I want a cider. Uh, yeah, I don't need a 20 minute sermon from yeah about how.
Speaker 5:However, he's like I'm so glad you guys are here. Like I, love having big parties and he gave us a hundred dollars worth of gift cards and the food is spectacular.
Speaker 2:So we've used fifty dollars that hundred but but it was really funny because like somebody in your party was like so your name's not jc, right he's like no, no, jc stands for Jesus Christ.
Speaker 5:I was like oh, I was waiting for, like Jesse or you know James, something Nope. Instead it's my moral enemy. Satan, do you make better pizza? I bet you do.
Speaker 6:Bro, I have more than one fire pizza down here. I got people fire pizza. I bet you do, bro, I have more than one fire pizza down here. I got people fire pizza.
Speaker 1:I bet you make some fire ass wings down there.
Speaker 5:Yeah, how hot, you want it.
Speaker 1:Not very hot. I want it to melt every layer of Murky's ass. We got that. The lava chicken special the. What? The lava chicken special Lava chicken special.
Speaker 6:What the lava chicken special? Lava special chicken special.
Speaker 2:Yeah, hey miles is streaming if only we could rate him as adhd after dark and we can all.
Speaker 6:That is not the rate he wants oh, he's playing pow world. Oh, he's playing power world, so don't be he's playing.
Speaker 3:Palworld.
Speaker 1:Started a new world over there.
Speaker 5:I'm going to start I should get a little bit of Marvel Rivals after this.
Speaker 2:I'm going to have to do the quick little edit. Then I can hop in and play. By edit I mean put it into the audio application and get the audio out. As long as we don't lose another great episode, like we did with me and dilla well, yeah, that's why I now, that's why I now interact with the podcast from the recording screen, so I can see when it fucks up yeah, the one, the one fucking episode that dilla was on um and uh, it got lost.
Speaker 5:That was back in, like the still watching Pokemon days and he never wanted to be on us again.
Speaker 2:I mean, we could still go back to watching Pokemon then he had a kid. I mean to be fair. He hated us before that did he? Yeah, he had a kid last year, wasn't it?
Speaker 6:No, he like technically.
Speaker 4:Yeah, technically because it's a new year.
Speaker 2:Uh-huh but yeah, it was just a few months ago, yeah, so it was like we had a lot of episodes out that he could have been on.
Speaker 5:Daddy Dilla.
Speaker 2:It was like what did we do wrong?
Speaker 5:That Daddy Dilla what did we do wrong.
Speaker 2:That's Daddy Dilla. He just disappeared. Sorry, Daddy.
Speaker 6:I'll look at him wearing that Xenostream 38 shirt. It's a pretty sick shirt.
Speaker 2:We're going to all get a message from Dylan House. He's going to be like what the fuck are you guys slandering me for on your podcast?
Speaker 4:We didn't know you were listening.
Speaker 1:Slandering. We want to know why he doesn't like us anymore.
Speaker 2:He's got a kid. That's probably much cooler than us.
Speaker 1:His kid is pretty cool.
Speaker 2:At least for another four years, until they get a mind of their own and become a fucking pain in his ass.
Speaker 1:I liked how the other day he commented that he could shit on his dick and Bruce's dog would eat it.
Speaker 1:What I was laughing was that in the snap chat, group chat yeah, cause he had sent the video of him with the orange and Monty was all interested in it, but then he let with the orange and Monty was all interested in thinking it was a snack for him. But then he let him sniff it and Monty was like, oh yeah, I don't give a fuck about that and turns around and runs away yeah, and Dilla's like I could literally shit on a stick and Bruce would eat that shit laughing, laughing laughing. I was laughing pretty hard about that.
Speaker 2:Oh god.
Speaker 1:Kate is pretty, pretty picky about his treats and snacks too.
Speaker 2:I'm pretty sure Key Lala's not picky. She's licking paint cans.
Speaker 3:Very true.
Speaker 1:How big is she now?
Speaker 3:She's getting shonky.
Speaker 2:About like that, felt like that big that's crazy.
Speaker 5:Rivet and dry or have team up on her.
Speaker 2:They're always gonna lose no, she's, she's still a pushover because she's the first one to go down and then gets on her back oh really yeah. And then she's battling like this. She's's not on top, it's a losing fight, yeah.
Speaker 1:She hasn't figured out that she's much bigger than them yet.
Speaker 5:Yeah, fighting off her back. We're going back to submissives. We're going back to the beginning of the podcast.
Speaker 2:I can't wait for this title to be called Come cake Come.
Speaker 5:There was something.
Speaker 4:I yelled in the middle, come full circle.
Speaker 2:It was obvious All right, goodbye everybody, come cake, see you, bye, see you in the future.
