ADHD After Dark
ADHD After Dark is the unfiltered podcast where a group of hilarious dudes with ADHD gather to talk about anything and everything that comes to mind. Brace yourself for an explicit and comedic rollercoaster ride, as we dive into the depths of randomness, pushing the boundaries of humor and edginess.
In each episode, we unleash our unapologetic, off-the-cuff banter, sharing outrageous stories, wild adventures, and side-splitting anecdotes that will keep you laughing throughout the night. No topic is off-limits for us—whether it's outrageous personal experiences, taboo subjects, or exploring the more intimate and risqué aspects of life, we bring a refreshingly audacious and humorous perspective to it all.
ADHD After Dark is your escape from the mundane and predictable. Join our crew as we navigate the uncharted territories of comedic chaos, reveling in the freedom to explore the untamed corners of our minds. We embrace the spirit of After Dark, where the content can get explicit, sexual, and edgy—pushing boundaries and challenging social norms with a healthy dose of laughter.
While we may not always offer informative insights, we guarantee an uproarious time filled with absurdity, spontaneous conversations, and unabashed humor. It's a podcast that's not afraid to go where others won't, creating an inclusive space for individuals who enjoy unfiltered comedic escapades.
So, grab a drink, kick back, and immerse yourself in the unapologetically hilarious world of ADHD After Dark. Warning: explicit content ahead—tune in at your own risk, but be prepared to laugh your way through our zany adventures, spontaneous tangents, and unabashedly funny discussions that defy convention. Welcome to the wild, comedic chaos of ADHD After Dark.
ADHD After Dark
S3 E6: Nippolas Cage
Use Left/Right to seek, Home/End to jump to start or end. Hold shift to jump forward or backward.
Ever found yourself chuckling over the enigma of belly button lint or the alchemy of toast-making? Prepare for belly laughs and nods of agreement as we wade through life's everyday oddities and the more profound waters of familial bonds and on-set safety concerns. We're not just here for the punchlines; we navigate the emotional complexities of having an engaged father figure, supporting family through tough times, and the delicate balance of humor and gravity that life often presents.
Imagine a world where 'katana nipples' and 'cannon dicks' aren't just the stuff of wild imaginations, but the topic of our latest banter-filled episode. We're crafting a superhero universe that's got us questioning the limits of love and the power of nipples – all in good fun, of course. But it's not all myth and metal bands; we also share a cautionary tale about keeping online transactions safe and debate the delicate etiquette around tipping our favorite delivery drivers.
Wrap up your year with the most outlandish Christmas action musical concept you've ever heard – yes, we went there, complete with 'Nipple Cage' and 'Dong Blade'. It's a roller coaster ride through the inventive to the incredulous, and we're taking you with us. From jury duty shenanigans to credit card point-hunting, get ready to be entertained, enlightened, and possibly a bit puzzled by our thrilling and sometimes absurd adventures. Join us, and who knows, you might just find yourself inspired to cast your own characters in the grand drama of life.
Twitter - https://twitter.com/DarkAfterAdhd
Wee, it's E, oh it's EOS webcam utility. That's when I told my dad I didn't care about a sexual line to Windows. What? That's what we were just talking about.
Speaker 1I thought we were talking about. Oh, oh, I see. Okay, yeah, got it.
Speaker 2What do you think I was talking about?
Speaker 1I thought you were having discussed your childhood trauma by getting beat by your dad.
Speaker 2Well, it was one and the same Must be nice still having a dad that's alive. It is pretty, it's actually pretty great. Yeah, I enjoyed my dad's company At least my brother's known in the hospital.
Speaker 1Jokes on or the fucking prison there you go Same. Thing hospital prison same thing. I don't have a brother's spoiler. Also, where's Markey?
Speaker 2I think he died.
Speaker 1He said he was going to go hang out with Dusty, but I'm pretty sure she's just going to beat the shit out of him if he comes out of the game. Yeah, she's 100% beating him. That's god intended right now Confirmed. Confirmed. Should we message him? Do we need to call for help? I'm going to message him. Alright, I'm going to message him. Poke a step, bro. Oh, there he is.
Speaker 2Fucking finally got demonetized.
Speaker 4Fucking late. The recording already started. As Christ the recording started.
Speaker 2I love how the first words out of your mouth wasn't sorry for being late, it was. I'm only one minute late. Hey, fucking Christ, dude Fucking, take this job seriously.
Speaker 1Remember whenever you had to weasel your way on the banner, weasel my way what?
Speaker 4is that Not factual? Not factual, what do you mean? Not factual?
Speaker 1You were not on the original banner for this podcast because you said you were going to be a sometimes guest and now you're a host.
Speaker 2Yeah, and then proceeded to come to every episode. You just wanted me around, sorry.
Speaker 4I think you just thought it was so funny because you wanted to be on the episode.
Speaker 1Didn't you say we had a guest for this week too? You said Ethan was going to be on the podcast. Oh yeah.
Speaker 4That's either next week or the following.
Speaker 1Oh, you lied to us again On his availability.
Speaker 4That's what I was originally told, but then that was changed. I think he probably got a work schedule and was like shit and let me know immediately upon the receivable of work schedule.
Speaker 1He never told us. I was expecting some cool Ethan stories.
Speaker 4Damn it. He's got some good stories. Yeah, he does.
Speaker 1Switch told me to tell the story of the Spanish job listing, but I don't know that I could tell it good enough.
Speaker 2I don't know if we can I don't know if I'm allowed to.
Speaker 1I think we need switch for that. We got to have switch for that Long story short. He was applying for hotel jobs, something, something, and then like the what was it? The laws.
Speaker 4There was a groundskeeper, the groundskeeper and the groundskeeper was the first one he applied for. Yeah, right Was in English.
Speaker 2Uh-huh.
Speaker 4And then he applied for the groundskeeper position.
Speaker 2Mm-hmm. Well, he was going to apply for the groundskeeper position.
Speaker 4Yeah, and it was only listed in Spanish.
Speaker 2Yeah, you could not find an English version of the application.
Speaker 4That was kind of fucked up. That's fucking, and switch was like oh here's a Spanish application.
Speaker 2Okay, so where's the English one was not to be found.
Speaker 1The hotel changes, assumes the person applying doesn't speak English. That's fucking so bad dude.
Speaker 2That's America, right there. Yeah, Yep, but you know what are you going to do I remember I was in Texas staying at a hotel on the day that was like a day without immigrants, that movement was happening. You remember that?
Speaker 1What Bigly yeah.
Speaker 2What is?
Speaker 1it what I don't remember this now.
Speaker 2It was a day without immigrants and it was a movement for immigrants to show, like, how important they are in daily society. And they all like boycotted their jobs for a day or went on strike for a day, rather. And I remember at the hotel they were like, hey, funny thing, because of this movement being observed, we have no housekeeping today. So sorry, but there will be no housekeeping and here's like whatever rewards or whatever and I was just like fuck, yeah, yeah, you do that shit. Good on you, housekeeping. That was pretty wild.
Speaker 1Pretty fucking wild bro.
Speaker 2Pretty fucking wild bro. Pretty fucking wild bro.
Speaker 1Hi Kate, hi Kate. Kate senses that there's some delicious food there. What you eating, zeno?
Speaker 4Did you end up going with tacos or with ramen?
Speaker 1Ramen. You're going to go waste on the fact that he held up an egg when you weren't here, that it was ramen.
Speaker 3And I just what if it was an?
Speaker 1egg taco. It'd be a very runny egg taco because it was a yolk.
Speaker 2It was very good. I got an extra egg because they're so good.
Speaker 1Got an extra egg. How much? That cost you as much as a McGrittle from Switch.
Speaker 2No, I think it was actually just a dollar, and actually I'm limiting myself. If I'm going to order DoorDash, I'm only going to take advantage of the 50% off DoorDash deals that they have, and this restaurant just happened to be on it, so it was like I got a drink and the ramen 50% off DoorDash menu.
Speaker 1Yeah, I don't have enough restaurants around me for that thing.
Speaker 2Yeah, probably not, but it was only 20 bucks for this big-ass bowl of ramen and a drink in it to be delivered to my fat ass Plus tip and I left a $7, $8 tip. Nice, it was like $7.50.
Speaker 1Yeah, that smile. You got to make sure that they deliver it. They did deliver it. If you don't give enough of a tip, they won't deliver that shit. Really, nobody will pick it up.
Speaker 2I've never had that problem.
Speaker 1That's because you live in a populated area. I usually tip pretty well.
Speaker 3Yeah, you got a lot of restaurants near you.
Speaker 1And you probably have a lot of dashers near you Over here. If you happen to tip the DoorDash default for an order, it may or may not get picked up.
Speaker 2If it's late in the evening.
Speaker 1And then DoorDash support is terrible. They're like well, it still says there's a dasher assigned to your order. It's been an hour and a fucking half. The restaurant's going to close in five minutes. They're like sorry, somebody's going to the restaurant. I'm like it's closed.
Speaker 2Somebody's on their way.
Speaker 1It's closed. You know, like I don't know, we can't give you your money back because it's said nobody. It hasn't been enough time yet I'm like, I'm fucking hungry, you could have just let me pick it up. And they're like sorry, sir, we can't do that.
Speaker 3You have heard their customer support's awful to deal with, like I saw a tick tock my ass, somebody yeah. Or somebody ordered through DoorDash and their driver did not have a car but still accepted the order, walking to the restaurant.
Speaker 1He walked like you. Walk like what? Seven miles.
Speaker 3It was like 10 miles to the restaurant.
Speaker 1They would have hours for the oil order to get delivered or something shit like that.
Speaker 3And they wouldn't let them cancel it with like a full refund. They would have to like pay to cancel it or some dumb shit.
Speaker 1They would, and I'm like that's unacceptable. You shouldn't have let Speaking of fast foods who's who's ready for fucking surge pricing and fast food.
Speaker 3Oh, actually, when these rolled that back, they said that, oh no, we don't do that.
Speaker 1But yeah, it's because the public went the shit. You are yeah.
Speaker 4Did you see the one? Did you see the?
Speaker 1one tick tock where the dude ordered Dave's single small combo. And then he get he orders and then like pulls up, and then his wife goes hey, you forgot to order my food. And he goes oh sorry, I'll just pull around. And then fucking dude gives him 13. He was like $13 for the meal. He pulls back around. He's like hi, it's me again. I forgot to order my wife's meal. Can I get another Dave's single? What size, small? And then, and then he goes OK, that'll be $28. And he goes the fuck. And the guy looking cuts back to the worker is like well, now we're into lunch hours, so the price is going to go up. Man, he's like this shit was just $13. He's like I don't care why.
Speaker 1Give me your money, I'm going to fucking stock market.
Speaker 4Back to the door dash thing when Zeno and I were, when I was living with Zeno, I do, or ask Jimmy Johns one night and I ordered like three BLT's like for me and then I think I ordered like another like couple sandwiches for Zino, if I remember right, right, and they never came. Mike, okay, they never know.
Speaker 4Like they took the money out and restaurant called me like hey, like we don't have any, like any bread left, we're canceling your order. I was like oh, okay, cool. And so, oh, fucking, what's my door dash? Like and like it would show the cancel never did and it just eventually said you're getting picked up by Dash, or. I'm like I don't want day old sandwiches tomorrow morning so like I canceled it. I was trying to get my money back. They want to give me my money back, like no, like they're still preparing the order. I'm like no, they called me so they told me they ain't testing this fucking bot and can you send us a picture of the food and tell us, like what's wrong?
Speaker 3Yeah, I remember they see it out because I could.
Speaker 4We had the table in the kitchen, so I cleaned off the whole table, like the mail and the bullshit, and I sent him a picture of the table of the bear table top.
Speaker 1You should have said did you set two plates down with nothing on them? That would have been even greener.
Speaker 4Shut up. It was just nothing on the table, like there is no food to send you. I just like they called me and canceled the order. Just give me my money back. I completely forgot about that.
Speaker 2Well, you remember this because I'm sort of you took a picture of the empty table.
Speaker 4when they asked for a picture of what's wrong, I was like I will say, which is, we don't have to do anything tomorrow except play video games.
Speaker 1Oh, you should have sent them a picture of your mom.
Speaker 2Jim McGill on sandwiches, because I remember Mercky was like what they want to send a fucking picture. Like what the fuck am I supposed to do? And then he goes, I don't want to do. And then he like went to the kitchen and he's like I fucking sent him a picture of the kitchen table Shawty. That's a fucking hilarious.
Speaker 1You know, did you even hear what I said?
Speaker 4There were still two more exchanges of like. Can you please send us, like a pick, a photo of what's wrong with the food? I'm like there is no photo to show you anymore, because there's no fun here.
Speaker 1Zeno, what I had said is you should have sent them a picture of your mom.
Speaker 2My mom.
Speaker 1No, Ricky's mom yeah.
Speaker 2At the time she might have been alive, Probably was so bitch, probably some of a bitch, maybe that that. That was not a bitch.
Speaker 1Yeah, couldn't have done that, never mind, yeah, jimmy. Jones, it wasn't even it wasn't Jimmy, it was the support is or she.
Speaker 4Joe Door, dash Fuck me.
Speaker 3You know, when it works, it's fine. Don't get me wrong.
Speaker 1Like it works less than it.
Speaker 4I didn't fucking I mean it does like, just doesn't longer than it should have.
Speaker 3Yeah, it's not great, let's be honest. Is it convenient? Yes, but when it fumbles, it fumbles the bag hard.
Speaker 2I personally not had an issue with, or that's because you have so much around you bro.
Speaker 1No.
Speaker 3Like I also haven't had an issue with them, but I've heard so many horror stories about them and I'm always like, yeah, yeah, they're booty.
Speaker 4I'm pretty sure I ended up on the phone for like 20 minutes At that point did you pay for it with a credit card?
Speaker 1Yeah, but you pay for it with a bank, oh yeah.
Speaker 3Credit card would have protected you a little bit more than a debit card would have. I would have, I would have, I would have. I fucking hear what happened to a woman in a subway.
Speaker 1Oh, where they took a thousand dollars from her yeah what.
Speaker 4I can't hear about this. Yeah, yeah, all right.
Speaker 3So I guess Coco and I can kind of explain it here. But there was this woman who stopped at a gas station to pick up a few sandwiches for her and her family and she didn't realize that for one of the sandwiches they charged over a thousand dollars but the other like sandwiches she got were normal priced. So it was like a thousand twenty something dollars is what she got charged for, which overdrafted her checking account. And then she kept trying to get a hold of the gas station.
Speaker 1Well, actually not that she always she asked them whenever she was there to refund her. She actually, before she left, they were like no, we can't, we can't credit that back and I'm like the fuck you can't. Why the fuck not, yeah, you could literally just void that check before any processing happened on it, Like you could void the transaction. So they were like you're going to call corporate and shit like that.
Speaker 3Corporate refused to do anything. The gas station refused to do anything. Her bank refused to do anything. And her bank was just like should you use a credit card? Could it protect you on fraudulent charges? Eventually, I think what happened was like the regional manager of the gas station chain gave her the one thousand dollars because she went back in, the subway was closed a week later. Yep, wow, they had a closed sign on there.
Speaker 1They packed up and left. They stole that woman's grand and fucking hightailed at the fuck out of there.
Speaker 2All right, we got enough out of this. Now let's fucking get out of here.
Credit Card Usage and Comedic Musings
Speaker 3So yeah, be careful about where you're spending your money here, folks.
Speaker 1That's also why I use a credit card all the time because you can dispute transactions easier, and then I just paid the credit card off.
Speaker 3I normally use my debit card, but if it's like a big, major purchase, I do it for every purchase. I use the credit card.
Speaker 1I do it for every purchase because they get points back.
Speaker 3That's fair.
Speaker 1I can also get points back, and then I just paid off at the end of the month, but then if something bad happens, I can always just dispute it.
Speaker 3I think my parents can always put that fear of using a credit card in me, so I'm always so timid to use my credit card Just make sure you pay it off at the end of the month and you don't pay any interest, and I always do.
Speaker 2And I don't know why you're fucking so scared about it.
Speaker 1I don't know, it's great, I get like fucking $500 back every three months or so.
Speaker 3Yeah, like my brains, like you can only use this in case of emergencies or really big purchases. But even like some big purchases, I'm still using my fucking debit card when I know I shouldn't.
Speaker 1I definitely do not use my credit card on big purchases. Gazz used her PayPal pay with friends for that one fee to the artist that and I was like man shouldn't have done that, because the dude immediately was like.
Speaker 1The dude was immediately like I'm so glad that you trusted me enough to pay, to select pay with family and friends, and then proceeded to bone her for the rest of the fucking time that he was working on her fucking avatar and like would just ghost her for weeks and then she'd be like, hey, you're going to finish this and she eventually finished it and he was like all right, you can pay me the other half of the money now.
Speaker 1And she was like bitch, no, you didn't fucking get it done in 21 days Like it was supposed to. You got it done in 210 days. You missed the zero.
Speaker 3And she kind of had to poke the bear on that discord.
Speaker 1Yeah, she messes the discord, Did you got so mad with her about that? He was like, well, I guess you can report me to the discord. But like I'm still going to work on this and finish it, and I'm like, bro, it wouldn't have got reported to the discord if you didn't take her money and then would be silent for weeks on a time and your excuse Shit.
Speaker 1Your excuse was that you were constantly in the hospital and stuff like that, and then maybe the correct thing would be hey, I'll give you the money back, go find someone else to do it.
Speaker 3That probably would have been the correct thing to do Because, like, if you are not able to provide the product, do not keep some money.
Speaker 1It was at that point. What are you talking about, Mary?
Speaker 4He spent all drugs and he started with Coke. And they found out Coke was really expensive, so he switched to meth and then he got into some bad strife and maybe some deals were involved and ended up in the hospital. That's how he was in the hospital.
Speaker 1Oh, we're talking. You like started just talking and I didn't know what you were talking about.
Speaker 2M nice Shyamalan twist ending Murky was the designer.
Speaker 4No, I am way too fucking thick to do those drugs.
Speaker 1Yeah, we're thick.
Speaker 2Yeah, three C's.
Speaker 4Yeah, if I did the drug, the drugs like that, I mean I'd be.
Speaker 1Dude, the other day, when we were playing you night, you were fucking, so you were so fucking just weeded up that you were good we did.
Speaker 4Yeah, we did up. I like that. I like that it's a fucking verb. Now it's yeah, we did it you fucking did a few joints over there. You know you did a few joints.
Speaker 2You eat it up, you're, you're you're weedle, you were, you were the good, you were just like.
Speaker 1I can only imagine that this was you in the couch. You were just like oh it was good. Yeah, see the see the fucking. The video on the fans.
Speaker 2I had to look over your long ass nipples while you're playing.
Speaker 1He was just like oh yeah, fuck you. Yeah, why are your nipples so long, bro?
Speaker 3Oh oh, you pull something out of your belly button.
Speaker 1That's always disconcerting. You ever like have an itch down there and like you come out and there's lint, you pull out and you're like man.
Speaker 4I fucking suck. Like every day. Yeah, every day when I get in the shower. And you're like where the fuck does it come from, you're like from your clothes, yeah, but how do you?
Speaker 1get how do you get so much like from one?
Speaker 4day.
Speaker 1You got stomach hair yeah.
Speaker 2Yeah, the fucking crap. That's fucking dude. I question how much how well God damn.
Speaker 1Every time you fucking wash clothes you have like a full fucking lint screen, right, you know where does it all come from. Like I feel like I've lost a full night, Joe.
Speaker 3where'd it come from? Where did I feel like if you wash a shirt?
Speaker 110 times. It's lost so much lint that it shouldn't exist anymore Like it's just now. All should be in the lint screen.
Speaker 4If only.
Speaker 2You might be on to something.
Speaker 1That's some voodoo magic we got going on there, yeah like the amount of lint that comes out of a lint screen and then like your clothes, don't like visually look. It's kind of like here's another one.
Speaker 2Like you have bread, right, yeah, okay, put bread in the toaster, push down the button. If you toast, correct. What happens to the bread? Where'd the bread go? It becomes put in bread. It gives you toast. Where's the bread go?
Speaker 4It's a toast.
Speaker 1It evolves you know that's nowhere near the level I'm talking about. How about?
Speaker 4how about this one Zeno? So, like, who decided to, who decided to, the fire is going to an EV.
Speaker 1Who decided to look at a field of wheat and said you know what, if we take this, put it in some water with some milk and fucking yeast and you get this nice delicious thing called bread.
Speaker 4I'm going to Assume all those things like fucked up and I like made them really sick. Think of all the berries that were eaten. Was like all right, we have to try this one next. There's a joke about that.
Speaker 1Oh God for meeting that berry. There was a joke about that, for, like, when people like the first people testing out mushrooms, they're like they were like something like. They're like something like well, this one tastes like steak. This one killed Joe and this one make Johnny see Jesus for a week.
Speaker 2I saw a comedian that had like a similar skit, except he was like you know, caveman, like testing out what animals they could eat and shit like that or what they could eat. And he's like all right, Jerry, Jerry had turkey. How was the turkey? Turkey's good? Cool, we can each turkey. All right, Jeremy, he had the rock, Jeremy's dead, OK, don't eat rocks. Like right that. And then it's like he went through a few others and he's like all right, Jack, he had the tiger. Where's Jack? Has anyone seen Jack? Nobody's seen. Okay, Don't fuck with tigers.
Speaker 3Actually, Zeno just brought up something that I recently learned. Have you guys ever heard of the mythological animal, the manticore?
Speaker 1I've heard the name, I don't remember what it is.
Speaker 3It's like a feline mythical animal but with like the face of a bearded man, and it's because before, like recorded history, people really didn't know how to describe tigers because it was such a quick thing and you were lucky to get out alive If you did that. When they tried describing it and people would draw pictures of it, it out came the manticores. So they legitimately thought there was this bearded freak monster out there just killing people. When it turns out it was just tigers.
Speaker 1Never heard of a tiger's bearded freak monsters from now on.
Speaker 2Have you ever heard of a hodag? What's?
Speaker 1a hodag Hodag, he's nuts on your face. No, I swear, I thought you were doing it, fuck.
Speaker 2I don't know what it was. No, it's actually a mythical creature in Wisconsin. It's a hodag. It kind of looks like a Komodo dragon with horns. Oh OK.
Speaker 1That sounds terrifying.
Speaker 2But it was a similar kind of a thing, like I don't know what it actually is or what they actually saw, but it's kind of like a Bigfoot kind of a thing or like a bunch of lumbermen. Yeah, would Tell stories of seeing some kind of a creature that's like a big-ass lizard like that roaming around.
Speaker 3Speak in a big-ass lizards and cryptids where my brother used to live before prison. Um, he was actually not too far from. It's called the lovelin frog. It's just a gigantic frog that crosses a fucking bridge.
Speaker 1That was a slurp and a half right there, bro. Yeah, let me see that bowl. Did they give that to you or did you put that in? Wow, that's a pretty fancy fucking takeout bowl there. Not bad, not a bad little dish.
Speaker 3D. Sorry, I'll let you know. Finished, it was an ADHD thought.
Speaker 2That was it.
Speaker 3Okay, do you guys know the band called Yerona? No, so it's a metal band and They've kind of gotten onto my newsfeed because you know I like metal rock, blah, blah, blah, whatever. I like you, and I have heard of them before, but I never really listened to them. Well, they popped up on my newsfeed because their front man Got kicked out of the band and originally I was gonna like scroll past that when I was looking at my newsfeed during my lunch break, but the one thing caught my eye was the reason why they kicked him out. Tiny penis, oh it's To that, really so say it's not what you're thinking, but you'll.
Speaker 3You'll see the connection here. So their front man I think his name is Diego, if I remember correctly. Let me see if I can find that arc again in my history. Yes, his name is Diego, and the band recently put out a statement saying all we, we separated ways with Diego. He admitted to doing something that made like the rest of us comfortable, so we decided that we are going to transition away from him and All this other stuff, and apparently he admitted to tampering with stuff. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Well, people started looking into it and what had happened was the front man was was spiking the protein powder of their basest, who is called six si xx, and Apparently he was spiking this guy's protein powder for like five months with estrogen. I Fucking heard about this, and the reason why he was trying to spike this guy's protein powder for estrogen was he was hoping this would de-masculate him enough that his fiance would call off the wedding and break up with him, and then this Diego guy could swoop in and steal his fiance.
Speaker 2I heard about those actually.
Speaker 1They grow titties before he noticed.
Speaker 4I do this.
Speaker 1You don't need any bigger titties, you already got the big ass. Dude, yeah, I big kids and big ass and long nipples his nipples would get even longer and dude would have samurai swords on his fucking chest.
Speaker 4What, what, yeah, you, imagine, if you got fucking, cold fucking.
Speaker 2Why did you imagine it, could you?
Speaker 1imagine he showed up to the dojo with like the fucking bamboo, fucking thing and just goes.
Speaker 2Oh shit, that was good. That was a good one, beautiful.
Speaker 1I get those every now and then not. But she don't, he just goes.
Speaker 4It's like the nipples are so.
Speaker 2All right, let's fucking go, bitches.
Speaker 1Oh, dude, dude. You would have the best time in a fight, dude, If they were like that sharp and that long you. You wouldn't even have to get naked, you just have to be like you've made a mistake. Now I'm horny and you're fucking.
Speaker 2This is like the name.
Speaker 1This is like the fucking sexual universe of wolverine, so like this is like the part of that we're gonna make a vulva ring. Somebody write this shit down dude.
Speaker 3I'd watch that, just like I want cocaine bear it's probably gonna be shitty, but I'd watch it better than cocaine bear. Let's be honest.
Speaker 4Yeah, I got all the saver stuff that one doesn't work, oh my god.
Speaker 2I would find, dude, we're gonna start spiking murky's drinks with.
Speaker 3That is transgendered. Maybe we can get a hold of those pills for murky.
Speaker 1I'm sure, I don't know if best feel like being cut by nipples when they're having sex.
Speaker 2That's bestie she would still love you if you had long katana size nipples.
Speaker 4I asked you a question.
Speaker 1And then come back, Bestie come back. That's a daddy come back.
Speaker 3Like no, I'm not come back.
Speaker 1Yeah, she's like oh cute, it's probably for the best.
Speaker 2I'm gonna text her right now.
Speaker 4Oh, oh oh oh, there we go, if you love me, if I had long katana like nipples, that's fucked what did you say just no, just no. She's like now Damn, maybe a worm.
Speaker 2Not even a worm.
Speaker 4Fuck.
Speaker 2No, that's not a real one. Take the wedding ring back right now. Yeah, take the ring back, I'm gonna read you it's still with the return window. It's like you're gonna be a fucking superhero and then she's gonna see you out there fucking vigilanteing up Fucking Villains and shit.
Speaker 4And then the fucking cypher.
Speaker 2You ask katana nipples and she's gonna be like man the sci-fi adept. This is a lie.
Speaker 4This is a lie. This is gonna be like fucking fruit.
Speaker 1Ninja, dude, you're gonna be like. You know those people that like, do this and get their nipples to like, do this and shit. He's gonna be doing that but slicing bullets out of the air, and then we can make a sci-fi edition of this with with lightsabers and they just come out, go. Oh, now I just want to see a movie where somebody has super long nipples Just starts doing an instant to flex bullets with their nipples. American can totally do that. There it is.
Speaker 1Fuck man, stars feet, wow, you know what. You know what? We need to pitch this to Netflix and they might make it. We'll get murky to start it. How are we gonna make fucking Like fucking katana length nipples? We're just gonna get a lot of hot dogs. Fuck A lot of hot dogs. No, cgi. We don't have the budget for that.
Speaker 4It has to be fucking. Yes, it has to be not yet.
Speaker 2Practical effects that comes in that comes in.
Speaker 1Fucking the nipple hunter too.
Speaker 2Return of the frozen section, or no, it'd be like big trouble and small freezer section or some shit like that. It's gotta be like an 80s movie title.
Speaker 1Yeah, we'll get fucking. Electric boogoo, we'll get what's it we'll get what's his name to fucking being it too. Oh, fucking austin powers nipples, blades.
Speaker 2Well, I thought you were gonna say Steven's a gore.
Speaker 1Yeah, we'll get Mike Myers in there too.
Speaker 2How about Steven's a gosh?
Speaker 3It will be Steven's a gore, maybe Bruce Campbell. We need some like beam of people.
Speaker 4The poses behind the, the nipple that by that, by that logic, we can absolutely nail Nick Cage.
Speaker 3Oh.
Speaker 4Hold on, get everybody from the cast of was it. Is it blood?
Speaker 1fighter. We should just get everybody from the castically.
Speaker 2Isn't a blood fight?
Speaker 3bloodsport bloodsport, yeah, yeah, everybody from that.
Speaker 1And. Zeno, uh-huh Coco oh my god, Zeno could be your nemesis because he'll have a katana length dick. It's just gonna be him like.
Speaker 4He's just trying to swipe your nipples off the earth and then.
Speaker 2I'm framing murky for all these crimes happening.
Speaker 1Cut people with my fucking katana, and he's just like one cut instead of two.
Speaker 2I have fucking two katanas. If I slice them they'd be cutting to three, but this guy's cutting to two. Obviously, this is the work of katana dick.
Speaker 4Albert dick dude, we'll just call you kadiq Kadiq, cannon dick cannon dick is the dick's got me way bigger than my nipple katanas, like fucking zeno zeno.
Speaker 1Oh my god zeno, your cock sleeve would literally be a fucking sheath for the sword If we have to have a close-up shot of you just going. This is, quite honestly, the dumbest episode of ADHD after dung. I don't even know how we got on this topic.
Speaker 2I know ADHD man, we just we ride with it.
Speaker 1I have to sit with a towel by my side from now on to wipe the tears out of my eyes. He's just over there like a fucking disappointed parent. Either that or he's fucking working on our submission to netflix. He's absolutely working on the fucking pilot episode right now. Oh shit, oh Do we? Oh, you know who else we should get. We should just hire amber herd as girl shitting on bed. Oh yeah.
Speaker 1Like we don't tell her that's what her role is, but we just say get up on the bed and crouch and then take a shot from outside With the just a silhouette of her.
Speaker 3We've had. You have experience in this role.
Speaker 1Oh, oh god oh fuck. I don't know how to top that. We still have fucking an hour hard left in this podcast.
Speaker 2All right so we're gonna start putting a movie board together for that, because that's, that's.
Speaker 1That's money.
Speaker 2Jesus nipple. It's gonna be amazing, it's gonna be great.
Speaker 1Oh, we could call it. We could, we could call it. Nipple Is cage.
Speaker 2You see the building inside her.
Speaker 1Yeah, man.
Speaker 2Oh fuck.
Speaker 1God yeah. I have a great idea. Every now and then I'm I'm out of this cage is absolutely gonna.
Speaker 2If we don't make him the main star, oh he'll absolutely be the main star.
Speaker 1He's the type of. He's the type of person that would be the main, just like he was in willy's wonderland or whatever the fuck it was.
Speaker 3Oh, wallies, wonder wallies.
Speaker 1I think it was willy. I thought it was willy, whatever he was in a fucking five nights of bready's knockoff film.
Speaker 2Yeah, I remember you guys talking about that and we have the mouth like willies, wonderland had me off.
Speaker 4What can we have? What like what we're saying right now? Our miles would not match any of the words.
Speaker 2So you want it to be like poorly dubbed. So what we'll do is we'll have we'll, we'll record it, we'll say we're gonna say this is a style.
Speaker 1So we want you to mouth the lines, but don't say them.
Speaker 2So we're just gonna. We want it to look like a 90s fucking Godzilla movie.
Speaker 1And then, and then we'll dub in over like the ADHD after dark podcast crew, speaking the lines for everybody.
Speaker 2But then we also still just get distracted and fucking talk about shit that's not related to the movie at all.
Speaker 1We start talking about the plot for movie two before they even find out. Bad guy is in movie one.
Speaker 2Just spoil the fucking ending and it's like all right. Well, the fucking part two, though. Fucking look out for this.
Speaker 1Is it, can I spoil endgame? Am I allowed to just say that right now?
Speaker 3It's been long enough.
Speaker 1Okay, it's like it'd be like at the start of the movie. We'll be like, oh yeah, by the way, iron Man's dead. Yeah, oh, my god, murky. Speaking of spoilers, I hope switch hasn't listened this far, but uh, it's been long enough for Game of Thrones spoiler switch, skip, like the next five minutes or so please.
Speaker 1But, dude, when murky was like I was like dude, switch just got all of Game of Thrones spoiled for him and murky was like there's no way. There's no way, switch Tell me. And switch didn't want to tell him and I was like it's pretty bad. He's like there's no way you could have spoiled the whole ending and then switch goes all right, fine, lena told me that John Snow kills Daenerys and murky's mouth just goes. I didn't hear anything. He was like I was like that is the biggest spoiler you possibly could have given him. Well, well, fun, funny story about that and I should be like ghost, or fucking weird.
Speaker 4It looks so fucking weird.
Speaker 1John snow had just come back to life, like that's where he's at, and came with the roads, john snow, and so it's not like they're even, they're even close to it. So like, actually, it was before he came back to life that Lena told him that John snow killed Daenerys and he was like, well, what the fuck? But he doesn't know that. It's like the last thing that happens in the show. So uh, so uh, hopefully he skipped this section and we'll move on to something else now.
Speaker 4Um, did you guys know if I hold on real quick? See now, I'm sorry, hold the thought. If I had a fucking giant fireball and I watched some bitch I fucking really hated, kill one of you guys, I would burn everything.
Speaker 1Oh, thank you, boo. What I really want you to do is to just have those huge katana nipples do the murder.
Speaker 2Yeah.
Speaker 4Artist for the dragon, I strength myself in that's how you actually tame the dragon. And I have two giant blades coming off the back of said dragon and I'm just fucking Bear a roll with it. So we turn into a breathing tornado and guys wild. It's a book. I'm writing. What is he?
Speaker 1What's the name of this?
Speaker 3book.
Speaker 4Fire and blades.
Speaker 2Guys, what if in the second movie, the sequel, fucking katana nipples and cannon dick have to team up?
Speaker 3And can. A dick has to put it in katana nipples. But so they fuse and become a new unholy warrior.
Speaker 1What would their enemy be in this, in the second movie? Oh Satan.
Speaker 3Dude, you guys are just like mini-years.
Speaker 2They're another enemy.
Speaker 3Well. I mean you're gonna be, an actor, but I have the perfect.
Speaker 2I can't keep my hand in Coco's ass when he's about to bust out laughing.
Speaker 1Burkey knew the minute I let out that.
Speaker 2Who do we have play them? The fusion of Ricky's mom and your dad.
Speaker 4Baldwin, individual. How you?
Speaker 2get out of the room for both. Get out like Baldwin. Yeah, I think.
Speaker 3I'll man slaughter.
Speaker 1Good he can play people that are dead Interesting, that he's going to manslaughter, considering it should be the crew that's going to jail for manslaughter because by all rights, he was given a gun that he was told was a prop gun and wasn't a real gun. And you know that's on the cruise, that's on the crew there. If you're told something's a prop gun and you're instructed to use this gun to point it out of the People so they can get the shot, you're gonna start to think that it's safe. And then Then it has a bullet in it and then it's like, well, maybe you shouldn't have given me the gun but I guess the other argument is he should have also not been pointing it in their direction.
Speaker 1As I can, I can see both sides of the Arg well, if you're giving a prop gun, the whole purpose of a prop gun for it to be like real gun.
Speaker 3Regardless, that's something that you they teach you early on in theater. You have a prop gun, you treated like it's a real gun. You point it like away from people, like when you see them like holding it, they kind of have it edited, they're like pointing like behind them. Technically, you should never have appointed directly at a person.
Speaker 1Fair, but they also should have probably not given him a real gun when they told him it wasn't a no.
Speaker 3They definitely should feel like if anybody, if anybody's at fault here.
Speaker 1It's the person that handed him the gun loaded.
Speaker 3Yeah, and that person got charged.
Speaker 1If I, then I don't see why they should be going after him, for because he's the bigger name. But that's dumb in my opinion.
Speaker 2Yeah, I'm not the case enough to have an is popped up enough on my news feed basically Accidentally shot somebody in the stomach or chest and they died.
Speaker 1Yeah but, Wasn't even trying to do anything and he was devastated when he found out that she died. He didn't mean to do it but, like 100%, somebody could have given that gun to him, knowing that it was loaded in an attempt to murder somebody, just to be a psycho, because people are like there shouldn't place a rubber's in it.
Speaker 3To begin with.
Speaker 1There shouldn't be anything in it.
Speaker 3Well, if you want the spark effect, there has to be something in it.
Speaker 1Yeah, but if you give it, but they gave it to him and told him that it wasn't loaded correct. So why that account that shouldn't have had anything in it?
Speaker 3Because I know the director also got hurt in that yeah, cuz the director was like behind the person right next to the game person.
Speaker 1Yeah, but again, even like in like those quick action scenes, though they can't, they, you can't avoid pointing it at people at all times, especially when you're like pulling it out to like do a quick shot, right Right. At some point in time that gun will be looking at somebody and if it went off during that point in time and somebody told you it wasn't loaded and it happened to be loaded a new shot, somebody the person who gave you the loaded guns should be at fault there for involuntary manslaughter. That's my opinion on it. I'd get kicked out of the case because of that opinion.
Speaker 4You see, neil deGrasse Tyson.
Speaker 1When he got called to a jury duty, when he was just like being questioned that like could you, could you trust the word like the police officer's testimony in this case, or something like that, and the guy was he was like no, I can't trust anybody's word, or something like that. And he was going back and forth and Eventually all the jurors were on the grass, ties inside like that they were gonna eliminate. So they basically want to eliminate the whole jury and it caused a problem for the trial because you can't do that. And then the judge said something and like quoted Neil deGrasse Tyson and Quoted it wrong. And all the jurors are like how can you expect us to trust the police officer when you literally just quoted the thing that this Guy said five minutes ago wrong? The judge was not happy.
Speaker 2When I was on jury duty.
Speaker 1You were on jury duty, you had to have to see a case. Or do they send you out?
Speaker 2No, I was actually served on the jury. Get fucked. Yeah, I've been called for jury duty like three times, but I've only served once.
Speaker 2But there was a lady that was just like obviously trying to get out of being on the jury, and they were like asking questions, and like one of the questions, like you said, was like Do you have? I was like Do you have the inability to make a decision, or something like that, on the case, or do you feel you would have an inability to Make a decision on the case? And the case was like possession of cocaine and Battery or something like that. And this woman just goes I have a. I have a problem making decisions every day of my life. So, yeah, I don't think I could do it. And the judge was just like okay, well, like you made a decision to be here today, right, so like you can make a decision. She's like well, yeah, I had to because, like, otherwise I go to jail. And he's like okay, but you could have chose to the not, though, too, but you did choose to be here, so we're gonna go ahead and keep you on the, on the jury and stuff. And she was like all upset about it. And then, like the next question was the Do you have any Medical issues that would hinder you from being on this trial for the foreseeable future. And she was like, yeah, I got really bad back problems. He's like, okay, do you have like a surgery planned or anything like that? She's like, no, I just I can't sit for too long, so like I just can't do it. And he's like, okay, well, that's, that's not excusable, so we're gonna go ahead and keep you on the jury.
Speaker 2There's like a couple other things that like she just kept trying. Every single question they would ask she would just be like, oh, yeah, I got problem with that. And then like the last one was like you have any reason that you would not be able to like give a honest Verdict and you have any reason to not trust or believe law enforcement or something. And she said, like her son was sent the prison or something. And she's like I don't believe he did it and I don't think it was right and I can't trust police now. And they were like, ok, yeah, we're just going to go ahead and let you go. And I was like you could have fucking got in contempt for court, because you were obviously just trying to get out of this the entire time.
Speaker 3Oh, I have once just told them straight up that I do not want to be here and I have ADHD, so I would zone out, and they've just passed me. They're just like, yeah, you don't have to be here, that's awesome.
Speaker 2My dad said he did jury duty once and the guy that was like sitting next to him was like man, I can't fucking do this. I got to get back to work, like what the fuck am I going to do? And they asked they asked this guy if he would Something to the fact of. Do you think, like you would be able to answer, if he was guilty, improving guilty, do you think you would be able to answer that verdict, knowing like he would be serving time or whatever? And the guy goes well, yeah, I mean, obviously he's guilty, we want to be here, right. And they were like, yeah, ok, we're going to go ahead and let you go. And he's like fuck, yeah, all right, see you later, dude.
Speaker 3Like what I've just learned. If you're just honest and you just don't do it, I straight up do not want to be here. They won't really try to argue most.
Speaker 2I was actually excited to be there. I was like, fuck yeah.
Speaker 1I'm worried. I've never, I've never been called for jury duty before. But I'm like I'm like worried that like I'll get called for jury duty and it'll be like one of those fucking national cases that lock me up for like six months, yeah, to make a shitty decision, and everybody hates me and I'm like, look, I want it out. So I had to agree with the majority.
Speaker 2Yeah, I was going to say it has to be unanimous, and when I did it I was a alternate and they don't tell you you're an alternate until it's time to deliberate for a verdict. And what an alternate is is you have, like a jury I can't remember if it's like eight people and then there's two alternates, so it makes a total of 10 or something like that. I think you're supposed to have 12. Maybe it is 12. So there's 10 actual jurors and then there's two alternates. But you don't know you're an alternate until you're deliberating.
Speaker 1That might only be for for small crimes, because I do know. For like a murder you need all 12.
Speaker 2Well, it's like you're still there and you sit through the entire court and then when you're deliberating, they tell the two people that are the alternates like hey, you're an alternate, you cannot say or do anything to influence the verdict. So me and the other alternate just had to sit aside and wait. Well, like, listen to everybody else talk and deliberate of like what they thought the verdict was and stuff like that, and then make a unanimous decision. Us two just had to sit aside and just kind of listen to them and not do anything. But if any of the other jurors were sick or not able to be there, then we would have filled that role for them.
Speaker 1Yeah, I think for a murder, though, you need to have every juror vote, like those big crimes.
Speaker 2Yeah, and then I mean the verdict was some verdicts don't need to drive for me.
Speaker 1Vertics don't need unanimous decision to.
Speaker 2This one was unanimous that we had. So it was like it was weird just sitting there and like having to listen to everybody deliberate it though, and not be able to put it in. But and then, when we had made her verdict, and everyone's like, ok, so unanimous, we're done. We just you can't leave that room or anything. You have to wait for the bailiff to just come and check in on you. And we were in there for like half an hour, and so we decided we were going to start playing hangman while we were waiting in there, because there was a white board, and we're like, ok, let's play hangman, something fun to do. And like everybody can do this and stuff. And like the bailiff came in and she was like, oh, hangman, and you think maybe that's, maybe your poor choice of a, of a game to play in the courthouse. And we were like, oh yeah, no, we didn't think about that fired back with what were we supposed to do?
Speaker 1We're bored Right. What other games can you play on a white board?
Speaker 2Yeah, we didn't think about that and maybe you should give us some cards or shit like that. Yeah, really, you can't take your phones on with you, of course.
Speaker 1Yeah, but you could have given you no cards.
Speaker 2Yeah, they could have Bitches.
Speaker 1Where'd Markey go?
Speaker 2I don't know. He's probably fucking stretching out his nipples so he can audition for the nipple.
Speaker 1Nipple is nipple is cage nipple is cage. Oh God, what's your character's name going to be? The Don Cannon or something like that.
Speaker 2Hmm, what's the thing?
Speaker 1about the dong blade.
Speaker 2Dong blade. Yes, beautiful dong blade.
Speaker 1He what you searching up over there.
Speaker 3Oh, trademark Scrolling through steam right now. Any good games. It is like the last day for most people at this apartment for their lease, so there's like a lot of banging moving around. That's happening like around this room. So banging. Certainly loud, so I'm just going to just zoning out.
Speaker 1Are they all having sex right now?
Speaker 3No, they're all trying to get for the first.
Speaker 1So when are you going to move out?
Speaker 3I don't know when I get a better job.
Speaker 1Yeah, how's that going? Terrible, that's unfortunate.
Speaker 2Doesn't feel good, don't worry. Once fucking nipple is cage takes off, you'll never have to work another day in your life.
Speaker 3Become a race car rolling in the money.
Speaker 1We'll just make seven movies, like fucking Sharknado did, and then fucking do anything for there, we'll sell it to the sci-fi channel. That still exists.
Speaker 2I think around.
Speaker 1So I don't have cable, neither do I, which is why I question if it exists.
Speaker 2Somebody tell us on Twitter Channel.
Speaker 1He's going to look it up right now.
Speaker 3Why the Apparently still going.
Speaker 2They still playing horrible B movies. Probably don't mind the story now. I don't mind the sci-fi B movies.
Speaker 1What was that movie, the fucking Shark man one where there was just like a shark on the moon yeah, that he was talking about that one time, where it was just so fucking stupid.
Speaker 3Oh, shark side of the moon.
Speaker 2Shark side of the moon. That's what it was. Yeah, I remember.
Speaker 1Fucking Christ when I could just fucking leaves and doesn't say anything.
Speaker 4Yeah, I have to have a schmig.
Speaker 2We were assuming that you were stretching out your nipples for your new role coming up, I was.
Speaker 3They're playing like nothing but one Tank top.
Speaker 2Oh, look at them long fucking katana nipples, can I?
Speaker 4wrap it. Holy shit, I can just stretch it out, dude you're going to cut through your fucking shirt Superhero, like I'll fit, like just tank top.
Sword and Katana Adventures
Speaker 2Fucking suck it in so you expose your nipples.
Speaker 4I can't remember the name so you can net what were you going to say. I'm trying. There was an old PS2 game that I played.
Speaker 1What's it about?
Speaker 4Me. You were a fucking like Dead soul kind of samurai. God damn it, I don't know. I remember dead soul.
Speaker 1I heard you say something, were you. Were you trying to say Ninja Gaiden, I'm?
Speaker 4going to pronounce Gaiden, whatever I possibly one of the Ninja Gaiden games, maybe.
Speaker 1I know all I heard you start to say was I?
Speaker 4was super, I was little.
Speaker 1I assumed you were going to be racist when you started that word.
Speaker 4by the way, no, but yeah, Ninja Gaiden. Ninja Gaiden maybe, but I remember like a few boss fights.
Speaker 1I got some wings upstairs. You guys need to be entertaining that happened.
Speaker 4I did my part for this episode. Bone.
Speaker 1It's. You'll see, I'm going to bring them down.
Speaker 4Oh, just should have got some spicy.
Speaker 1No, oh my God.
Speaker 4Oh, those ass.
Speaker 2That was straight up.
Speaker 4Do you guys see how pale and hairy it was?
Speaker 2Yeah, it was a very hairy ass.
Speaker 4It was, I think, the only one that could rival.
Speaker 3It is mine, but I'm not showing that on camera.
Speaker 4OK, come on. But the fans Lee. Someone was described to see all of our asses.
Speaker 2No, no, no, no, no. I got it. He is going to be the main villain in the second movie with this hairy ass. Oh, maybe Coco and he combined themselves to make an ultra hairy ass the Tangler the Tangler.
Speaker 4Oh my God, just wraps up your dick and wraps up my katanas. Yes, yes. Earth powers.
Speaker 2Oh yeah, that's why we got to combine our powers to rival them.
Speaker 4You're not not Katana cannon. Dude Can Dick Katana Nipples Katana cannon.
Speaker 2Wait, we came up with a name for me. What was it? I don't remember Dick blade or something like I fucking forgot it Dick.
Speaker 3It was clever and that's pretty good.
Speaker 2Now, it wasn't Dick blade, it was something blade and I had something to do with my dick. I remember what Coco said. Hopefully he remembers.
Speaker 3Actually, he's probably going to forget by the time he comes back.
Speaker 2Guarantee You're probably right.
Speaker 4Guarantee.
Speaker 2Good news is Marky's got to listen to this episode like five times tomorrow, so we'll definitely get the name again.
Speaker 4Hope for sure. I'll tell you guys the name of the morning. It's within the first hour of the podcast. I'll get through the first hour and days work. Yeah, oh, I'm just wearing my headphones and I don't have anything going. I'm just working.
Speaker 2Just make it look like I'm listening to stuff, so for people to talk to you.
Speaker 4Yes, so none of the other techs talk to me.
Speaker 3Excuse me, it's fair.
Speaker 4It works.
Speaker 2Yeah.
Speaker 4It's a good idea.
Speaker 2Hey Coco.
Speaker 3He doesn't have his headphones on. You can hear me.
Speaker 2Hey, what was my?
Speaker 1character's name Um Dongblade.
Speaker 2Dongblade. That's what it was Dongblade.
Speaker 1Oh, Merky wasn't here when I said that.
Speaker 2No, and you missed the actual villain for the sequel.
Speaker 1Oh, it's not mine and Merky's mom.
Speaker 2No, Merky hit him with the name. Oh, fucking the.
Speaker 4Tangler.
Speaker 2The Tangler, the Tangler, yes, and the Tangler is a fusion of yours and ease Harry asses.
Speaker 4They use their airy like powers.
Speaker 1Oh, Nipple blades Did I get you by showing you my hairy ass. Yes, I walked away. I was like I'm going to give them a little peek, and then I heard every go that goes to us.
Speaker 2Yeah, we were talking about how hairy it was. The knee was like I think the only person that could rival that hairy ass is my hair.
Speaker 1Yeah these wings.
Speaker 2Those look like some sexy wings it does. But then the Tangler was born. Fucking, don't play it, I fucking love it. How could I forget that?
Speaker 4That's a. It's your character Name, that's an.
Speaker 2S. Yeah, I know, don't blade.
Speaker 1I think Nipple's cage was also a pretty ass to your nipple.
Speaker 2This cage is pretty good. How does Nipple's cage come into the? It doesn't fucking matter, you know it's going to be movie.
Speaker 1It's going to be a B movie. Nicholas Cage is just going to show up.
Speaker 2Yeah, nicholas Cage is going to be in it For like two seconds. Nicholas Cage going to play. He'll be like a cab driver or something like that.
Speaker 1Drive room. We'll make a nod to him with murky saying my name's Nipple's cage, and he'll look over and be like mine's. I think it was like.
Speaker 4We like poster arts is going to be don blade like weak field. Ish him samurai doubt. But the sun, instead of being shaped as a sun, is shaped as a dick.
Speaker 1We'll have to make a joke about the sword and stone at some point, like somebody gets their sword stuck in a stone and then they can't pull it out, like Excalibur, and they're just stuck there for a little bit.
Speaker 4I think it's used their dick as a hammer, because they just just strength, pull the fucking rock.
Speaker 1That would be the villain. Mm-hmm Are we gonna make a funny be movie with the villain being like fucking spaceballs fucking you boy.
Speaker 2I didn't expect this was gonna be a serious be movie.
Speaker 1Got.
Speaker 2Katana nipples and dog play.
Speaker 4And nipples cage brows like I plan for four to five movies.
Speaker 1I think we hilarious though as serious because of how outrageous the concepts are. Right, right, I Nobody just acknowledges the nipples. They're just like well, that's a super problem.
Speaker 4I'll show what. So this is Lord the Rings level shit on a yeah absolutely for sure, for sure for movies, isn't it up? Like eight movies not like a first two movies.
Speaker 2I think Curies this might be generous, but I think the first two movies will hit theaters and then after that it will probably be direct to DVD.
Speaker 1Should we start with a movie, or should we write a book and hope somebody adapts it for the movie?
Speaker 3No, I definitely want to start with the movie our guile did, where they do both.
Speaker 4Cuz.
Speaker 1I'm not talented enough to write a book.
Speaker 4I'd send you guys a letter, straight us bail. It'd be like, all right, what's murky guy? I'd be like I know right good, I know right good, it's all you to give her man. Yeah, look with the book writing.
Speaker 2Are you telling Shan Shan about the fucking epic adventures of nipple katanas and dong blade? Were you telling Shannon about the epic adventures of fucking nipple katana and dong blade?
Speaker 3No, she was just curious if I used the last the, the turkey deli meat we had, and the answer?
Speaker 1he sliced it with his dong blade.
Speaker 3No, he tangled it with us, the tangler, I might as well like the dong dagger.
Speaker 1In that case, minds the dong needle, don't needle, oh dong blade.
Speaker 2It's catchy what else we yeah, it is, it is right. Like do we just call this episode nipple is cage. Yeah, absolutely, yes, absolutely we do what is them?
Speaker 1What is our movie title gonna be? That's the title this episode.
Speaker 2Movie title it's gotta be like an 80s movie, like an 80s or 90s action movie. Let's look up some 90s action movies nipple cage return of the dong blade action movies.
Speaker 3All right, so here are some 80s B action movies. We have Drive blood suckers from outer space, blue velvet action Jackson, I'm bringing up a GPT right now.
Speaker 4I'm still thinking dong blade nipples of steel cobra.
Speaker 2Raw deal it probably just nipples of steel would work right. Right, yeah, I think so. Let's see what chat GBT says, though. Like, give them the prompt of like this is what the movie is about. Give us an 80s, a 90s movie. Title.
Speaker 3Don't don't ask Google's Gemini, because apparently murky coated that stuff. I Don't know what that was for the nerdy guys out there a.
Speaker 1Character. One is the hero who has two giant nipple katanas on his chest right. And what's his name? I'm gonna give it nipple is cage and I pee, pee, oh la s. Is that how we want to spell it? Don't know how we spell. Nipple is cage. Oh god's the spelling we're going with. It works. And second, and a villain. He fights, he faces a villain, a villain named Dong. Is there a hyphen in this or is it one word?
Speaker 2It's one word for sure named dong blade.
Speaker 1It's gotta be, the name's gotta be, just as long as my dog name suggest, has a katana for a dick. Yeah, we would like what 80s, 90s?
Speaker 380s action.
Speaker 1Movie movie movie film title referencing these two characters.
Speaker 2I can't wait.
Speaker 1I've got four, five, six titles. Okay, I don't number one blades of fury nipple is cage versus dong blade the ultimate showdown.
Speaker 2I like it. I like it coming out strong, not bad.
Speaker 1The next one nipple is cage blade warrior clash of Titans. Okay, okay, katana clash. Nipple is cages fury versus dawn of dong blade. I. Must say that was my favorite. Yeah, I'm currently there nipple is versus dong blade, battle of the blades. This one's in all caps. Nipple is cage cutting edge, the dong blade duel, that's it that's gotta be it the dong blade duel.
Speaker 2And then the next one is blade battles.
Speaker 1The nipple is cage saga. Rise of dong blade.
Speaker 3Oh, that's also a good one.
Speaker 2I feel like that makes it sound like dong blade is a hero in all these kind of does.
Speaker 1Except for the dong blade, duel sounds pretty fucking good.
Speaker 4Yeah, we turn it into a musical, but we only make, but we make cocoa.
Speaker 1And he's saying all this now make the title of musical Melody of blades, nicholas cages. Nipple is cages, harmonic duel. The dong blade, operetta State, singing steel. The nipple is cage. Musical dong blades are a harmony of heroes. Nipple, listen. Nipple is versus dong blade, the musical battle. Nipple is cage, rhythm of rivalry, dong blades, serenade, ballad of blades. That's a pretty good one. Nipple is cages, lyrical quest, john blades, overture. I mean obviously like we could shorten these if we wanted. But these are just ideas. Nipple is cage, the musical blades and harmony.
Speaker 4That's hot.
Speaker 1Should I ask it's the best idea ever dude, all we have to do is ask chat, gpt, stupid stuff. We should literally just do that when we hit run out of ideas.
Speaker 2Yeah, definitely.
Speaker 1Now many good Christmas movie, like diehard.
Speaker 2Make it a.
Speaker 1Christmas movie like diehard.
Speaker 2Oh, this is my favorite episode. This is my favorite episode ever.
Speaker 1Nipple is cage holiday heist. Don't blades winter war.
Speaker 2Dude, I just I fucking figured out how fucking katana nipples is gonna beat dong blade.
Speaker 1Nicholas cage, you'll tie blades.
Speaker 2Yes, all right. So Nipples cage is going to Like be losing the fight against dong blade, right, right. He's gonna get the idea, though, that if he goes into the like freezer, cooler, and locks dong blade in it, his nipple katanas are only gonna get harder, while dong blades dong is only like his dog blade is only gonna get shorter and shorter Giving see how much my glasses are fucking up, by the way giving katana nipples the competitive edge. Right I'm walking full proof.
Speaker 1We're so fucking stupid.
Speaker 2Who let us four assholes have a microphone and access the discord?
Speaker 1the government gave us money.
Speaker 2Yeah, adult money.
Speaker 1Fucking jingle blades.
Speaker 4Hour 10 hour 12 minutes in Nothing beats jingle you know what?
Speaker 1you know what I'm gonna send, just a chat GPG. You know what? There's not enough Easter killing movies. Give me some titles for that.
Speaker 4Listen to those fingers. Go to work. God guess is a lucky lady.
Speaker 3Oh, absolutely, she is.
Speaker 1Oh my god, dong blade nickel. Nipple is cage. Bunny blades Dong blades. Easter hunt Um nipple is cage, resurrection rumble.
Speaker 4No, you're my family. Disown me. What if?
Speaker 1you had millions of dollars? I don't think so. I think they'd be like your brother is not going to for sure.
Speaker 2Oh, I'll have your brother, and no matter what we'll be like. Yeah, this fucking shit's funny as fuck. I watch this movie all the time fucking the Resurrection rumble that's pretty fucking bad.
Speaker 4Next shark NATO.
Speaker 1Except, oh yeah, we just don't have money to make it. We can make all the funny titles somebody, somebody who's rich and has a lot of Money to spend Jeff Bezos also listens to the podcast, not Jeff.
Speaker 4Bezos.
Speaker 2I bet Elon Musk would do it. Hey, have you ever seen chicken run?
Speaker 1Okay, okay, nipalus cage sculpted warriors. I Think it's giving me title suggestions based off of my YouTube, like preferences and stuff. That's why it's so long, which is why I'm like we could definitely modify it, but I love the shit that it's giving me. Battle of the baked Battle of the baked yeah, cuz the clay is baked. Yeah, or murky's just baked all the time, that's true. Yeah, oh, mudden metal the nipple is cage creation. I didn't have much hope for that one yeah oh. Now making an anime oh.
Speaker 1Nipalus cage blades of legacy or an Edge of destiny, oh.
Speaker 3Nipalus cage is honor.
Speaker 4Oh.
Speaker 2How much longer do we have I? Don't think I can stretch this anymore, yeah. We're gonna start working on that demo of fucking. Nipple is cage. What was the movie title we were going with?
Speaker 1Which, which era.
Speaker 2I think the first set. Then we have one that we really liked.
Nipple Is Cage
Speaker 1So the first set blades of fury. Nipple is cage versus Don Blaine. Nipalus clades, cage blade warrior. Clash of Titans, katana clash. Nipple is cages, fury, steel, courage. Nipple is versus Don Blaine, nipalus, cage, cutting-edge and blade battles the nipple is cage saga. I Think once I said jingle blades, all the knowledge of the first one left my brain, brain. Yeah, same, we're releasing it on Christmas and we're calling it jingle blades.
Speaker 2The Nipalus.
Speaker 1Story there once was a man related to Nicholas cage Was nipple is cage.
Speaker 2Nipple can't on us his name. Nipple is cage coming to a theater near you, oh.
Speaker 1My god, throw that in there with a couple of these. Yeah, nipple, is cage coming to a theater near you?
Speaker 4Democracy.
Speaker 2What happens when the streets are overrun by dong blades. Fuck thugs, fuck it liberating with their nipples only one hero can save us this Christmas season. His name Nipalus cage.
Speaker 1Chicken, but I'm gonna choke on it if I put it in my mouth right now. Dude Shit Damn.
Speaker 2I love it. I love it. I'm glad that we get together. Yeah, I just yeah. It's a never a dull moment, that's for sure. That's for sure. I'm gonna be thinking about this movie for the rest of the week if you're listening, this is going to work here, fucking wild. It's kind of like I was how's the divorce going for you? Cuz I'm assuming your divorce Was that too much? Was that too much? That's where we're drawing the line. This doesn't apply, you guys oh.
Speaker 1Oh god I guess news right now.
