Ever been tickled pink by the thought that our quirkiest traits might just be a maternal gift? Our latest ADHD After Dark episode is where genetics meets jest, as we chuckle over the legacy we inherit and the odd legacies we could leave behind. It's a wild ride through the comedic mines of familial traits, complete with risqué hypotheticals that'll have you clutching your sides in laughter.
Navigating the laugh-out-loud labyrinth of politics and privacy, we sidestep the usual banter for a satirical romp through the world of microtransactions and gaming reviews. Remember the time a Kung Fu Panda character's demise became an adult entertainment hit? We're still scratching our heads too. From the state of Texas to the state of confusion over Dragon's Dogma 2's microtransaction mania, we've got hot takes that are more entertaining than a cat interrupting a gaming session—though that happens too.
But it's not all fun and games—well, actually, it is, but with a thoughtful edge. We wax poetic about the universe with a dive into quantum theory, musing on the existential hilarity of quantum immortality. Plus, join us as we muse over the therapeutic nuances of gaming content creation and the balancing act of life, hobbies, and relationships. Whether it's Chicago's Mexican Independence Day fireworks or navigating the Havencraft card chaos, we promise an episode that's as insightful as it is uproarious. So if you're craving a dose of humor with your daily dose of pondering, plug us into your speakers, and let the good times roll!
Twitter - https://twitter.com/DarkAfterAdhd
Ever been tickled pink by the thought that our quirkiest traits might just be a maternal gift? Our latest ADHD After Dark episode is where genetics meets jest, as we chuckle over the legacy we inherit and the odd legacies we could leave behind. It's a wild ride through the comedic mines of familial traits, complete with risqué hypotheticals that'll have you clutching your sides in laughter.
Navigating the laugh-out-loud labyrinth of politics and privacy, we sidestep the usual banter for a satirical romp through the world of microtransactions and gaming reviews. Remember the time a Kung Fu Panda character's demise became an adult entertainment hit? We're still scratching our heads too. From the state of Texas to the state of confusion over Dragon's Dogma 2's microtransaction mania, we've got hot takes that are more entertaining than a cat interrupting a gaming session—though that happens too.
But it's not all fun and games—well, actually, it is, but with a thoughtful edge. We wax poetic about the universe with a dive into quantum theory, musing on the existential hilarity of quantum immortality. Plus, join us as we muse over the therapeutic nuances of gaming content creation and the balancing act of life, hobbies, and relationships. Whether it's Chicago's Mexican Independence Day fireworks or navigating the Havencraft card chaos, we promise an episode that's as insightful as it is uproarious. So if you're craving a dose of humor with your daily dose of pondering, plug us into your speakers, and let the good times roll!
Twitter - https://twitter.com/DarkAfterAdhd
Are you actually ready?
Speaker 2:Yeah, Are you sure you're ready? We Okay, because I hit the record button during all of that.
Speaker 3:I'm the most ready.
Speaker 2:We're back. Adhd After Dark with three people Zeno, do we Zeno? Are you busy getting your thingy wet a little bit? Is that what's happening tonight, or?
Speaker 1:are you two? We all know Zeno is celibate.
Speaker 2:He doesn't do that, zeno. No, I mean, did he drive to Chicago? Yeah, he's celibate.
Speaker 1:He's never gonna get laid. What are you talking about? I?
Speaker 2:don't know what that word means. It's too big for my brain.
Speaker 4:It means he doesn't drive.
Speaker 2:It's not a drive spell. He's fucking talking to women and so he's too good for the podcast now. What a bitch exactly. What a fucking asshole.
Speaker 1:What a fucking asshole man oh, a girl finds me attractive. I'm no longer gonna be part of the podcast.
Speaker 2:Apparently she's also uh worried. You're not worried. She's uh interested to see his huge dong, thanks to the podcast. So this, just in adhd after dark, is now going to start up a dating business subsidiary where uh the ultimate wingman yeah, we're the ultimate wingman. You just give your girlfriend this podcast and tell us your name, and for five dollars we'll talk about how big your dick is as much as you want coincidentally, that's how much a month it is for the fans that nobody follows or is subscribed to.
Speaker 2:Correct, I'm going to keep uploading stuff there. Go look at our fans. You fucking pieces of shit. Why are you not there, you fuck? Do you want E to eat?
Speaker 3:Do you?
Speaker 2:want E to eat tonight.
Speaker 3:Yeah, because TJ ain't doing it. Okay, we need something to, we need a side hustle, and this is it. We do this for you guys.
Speaker 2:Remember when we used to shit on our listeners? Yeah, what the fuck are you still listening to us for?
Speaker 1:Yeah, but we're not Game of Tears, we actually care a little bit about.
Speaker 2:Uh, it's what's your superpower game of tears was like hall's last ditch effort to save the fucking podcast um, I was going by the last thing.
Speaker 1:You guys were fucking called, I mean to be fair.
Speaker 2:Game of tears is a great way better idea than what's your superpower.
Speaker 1:I'll be honest I think it would have been a better youtube channel than a podcast idea.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you're a better my dick thing christmas, hey yo jingle blades jingle blades christmas. Yeah, you gotta go subscribe to the fans so we can afford to pay for jingle blades. Right, like if, if you listeners actually at least follow.
Speaker 1:At least follow so we can unlock shit on Fansly, we will actually attempt to create Dongblade and Nippleis Cage and all their friends.
Speaker 3:It'll just be us and fucking Zeno's backyard.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and why not? Why wouldn't it be? I mean I love, love it, I love you. I don't know what to talk about. We kind of overdid the nippleless cage thing and I don't know what to do now. Anything interesting happen in your life. What about the pee in your pussy story? Yeah, murky, you have a story to tell this story today.
Speaker 3:That was like kind of you were allowed to tell it on the podcast yeah okay, just change out names it's just odd, it's very odd, and I was well, whenever the story is described as peeing and pussy, it it's Prince.
Speaker 3:You know where we're going A friend of mine and his two co-workers. They all work as a three-man team. Two of them are brothers and the two brothers are not my friend. Okay, so my buddy and one of the brothers is on the roof and the other brother is up on some scaffolding. They work in a factory. And the brother on the scaffolding looks over towards him and goes stop peeing in my pussy, you're gonna make me queef. And they both stop and look and the brother that's on the roof looks at the brother in the scaffolding and is like pee in my pussy and you're gonna make me queef. The brother's like yeah, brother on the roof, porn hub Question mark.
Speaker 3:Brother on the scaffolding's like yeah, porn hub homepage. Brother on the roof, did you click it? Brother on the scaffolding's like yeah, porn on the home page. Brother on the roof, did you click it? Brother the scaffolding like doesn't want to admit it first. Yeah, did you come? Brother on scaffolding? No, but I did like kind of fast forward through it and but I did like kind of fast forward through it and kind of watched it, I guess, and it was a guy actually peeing at someone's pussy and it was fucking awful. Basically, he let the intrusive thoughts win and guys, you got to find it Okay.
Speaker 3:I would have a hundred percent clicked the video when you're walking down the street. He said it was on the homepage. Like he said it was like one of the first few videos.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you know why it's on the homepage Because enough people clicked it out of fucking curiosity that it tricked their algorithm and they're like man, fucking Americans, dude.
Speaker 3:So that was my disturbing story of the day.
Speaker 2:I went to Pornhub the other day and fucking what's the turtle from fucking what's it? The Kung Fu Panda movie.
Speaker 4:Master.
Speaker 1:Oobway.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, the fucking most viewed video in the United States was Master Oobway dying, and it was a 14 second clip of him fucking dying. Of course I clicked the video. I was like I have to click it. It's fucking top recommended for the US right now and it was just 14 seconds from the fucking movie.
Speaker 3:Porn's weird man.
Speaker 1:You gotta remember when Pornhub used to just randomly have let's Plays on there that had like thousands.
Speaker 2:There still are. Let's Plays on there. That has thousands of views. There are, but they kind of also did that random purge well, it's because now you have to be verified to post shit because underage stuff. Um. Speaking of weird shit, fucking texas sucks. Were you here when lil was talking about the shit that their governor did? Um?
Speaker 1:no, but I wouldn't be surprised.
Speaker 2:So he was like they, they banned porn hub in texas and I was like what do you mean?
Speaker 3:they've been in general did they also ban porn in uh like utah as well. There's another state that did well, they didn't they.
Speaker 2:They banned it. But like the way they banned it is, they're like, yeah, you gotta create an account to uh, to the driver's license with a driver's license and shit to fucking to view porn on Pornhub.
Speaker 2:And I was like, oh boy, I think I think what I was just like. I think, oh yeah, I was talking to Lil about this because I was making a joke and this should have been on the podcast. But I was just like I hope to fucking god a bunch of people who are just super horny goes to their governor's uh, fucking, um, uh estate and just make a giant fucking cum line like just to protest the bill. And then I was like, yeah, but it's also texas, so it's probably going to be the largest mass shooting in history if they did that you're also not wrong am I wrong?
Speaker 2:I'm pretty sure their fucking governor would shoot a bunch of people coming on his driveway and fucking cold blood and claim it was self-defense, because he was afraid of getting pregnant because they were all.
Speaker 2:They were all beating their dicks at me I was at the same state that considers like a frozen embryo person yeah, he was afraid of having to pay fucking millions of dollars of child support because my fucking unfucking underdeveloped child was on his yard just dying there wriggling. Yeah, fucking an egg so if they say an embryo, like embryo, that's fertilized, right, yeah, how far do you think they would go? Do you think they would say, well, like, well, then, my sperm must be half of a human. So me nutting into the toilet is committing genocide. Every fucking time I do it.
Speaker 1:To what you did this morning that.
Speaker 3:I've killed.
Speaker 2:I've killed trillions too.
Speaker 1:We should be in jail for manslaughter.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I feel like all the Republicans and Democrats and everybody in the state should just be jail for manslaughter. I feel like all the Republicans and Democrats and everybody in the state should just be arrested for manslaughter because of the amount of fucking sperm flushed down the toilet per year.
Speaker 1:Especially the Republicans, for what they were about to fight.
Speaker 2:Yeah, but Republicans touch children, so that's a complete like actual children.
Speaker 4:At least the ones in Texas.
Speaker 2:I don't hear about any of this.
Speaker 1:I don't watch the news enough, apparently I get my news through tiktok and maybe that's why they're trying to get rid of tiktok is because they're like, oh no, with the mass media is not reporting on this fucking app.
Speaker 2:Let's ban it, because facebook and youtube are giving us money, it'll just go to other sites.
Speaker 1:They know that also did you see, the guy that was like streamlining, getting tiktok banned, and was like trying to could use this as spyware on the american people. He fucking dropped out of I forget what it was congress or whoever that passed the first. He dropped out of it after they had passed it so he could go into an American own like uh, trying to remember basically a spyware company where he could look at what the American people were doing.
Speaker 2:Well, go to fucking, go to fucking porn hub and search peeing and pussy.
Speaker 1:I'll do that, but.
Speaker 2:I'm not. I'm not gonna go look it out, but if it comes up on my home page. I didn't see it that's one of those ones where, like, somebody clicked the video and they're like I guess I'm fucking close, I might as well just rub it out, right.
Speaker 1:It's like I'm already here. I've already gone through like two stages.
Speaker 2:I've seen worse.
Speaker 1:I've seen the ADHD after dark fans leave page. I've seen worse.
Speaker 2:I've seen way worse than somebody peeing in a pussy.
Speaker 3:Yeah, look at my butt hole. Oh same, Absolutely.
Speaker 2:If anybody I've never personally watched Two Girls, one Cup, but if anybody's ever seen that, that's definitely worse.
Speaker 1:So I've seen it and it made me throw up. Uh, so what had happened is this was all the way back in high school for me, and it was me, and these two people have sadly passed on for various reasons, but it was a friend named james, a friend named lucas and, uh, an ex from high school of mine. Do you kill?
Speaker 1:all of them showing at james's house and I forget how it just randomly came up, but like three of us were just like oh yeah, I'm glad I haven't seen it because it was like a stupid thing.
Speaker 1:And then james decided to just be a little shit and he snuck over to his computer without like telling anybody and like he was able to like move the screen to where nobody could really tell what he was looking up, because he was playing like music off youtube. And then he turns the screen over and then, boom, there it is, as they're defecating into the cup or the blender or whatever the fuck it was. I don't remember, and just I, I just wanted to bomb.
Speaker 2:It is the only thing I remember fun fact because xeno's not here and can't defend himself. He recorded that. Yeah, yeah, zeno recorded two girls one cup. Yeah, he does. Uh question uh, you get a thousand dollars, marky, but you have. But, but you have to come to either two girls one cup or the pee in the pussy video. Would you do it, and which one? Would you take? A thousand dollars, yeah, thousand dollars.
Speaker 3:I've never seen one of the videos. Can I just like close my eyes now you gotta watch it, no I actually have to have open eyes but it would probably be they say hello um it. It would probably have to be like the pee in the pussy one, because I love it.
Speaker 2:I love dusty turning around I mean yeah, you're gonna have to turn around and explain to Dusty. Did you see the fucking quick take that she did when you said that? Go check the fans for Dusty's reaction?
Speaker 4:Oh my God, the one person was like Pornhub, the other person was like yeah, the other person was like did you watch?
Speaker 2:it. The other person was like yeah.
Speaker 3:The other person was like did you watch it? He was like no, it was just exactly what the title said IP is the girl's pussy. So that's what we're talking about Horror's weird man.
Speaker 2:Dude, did you see her reaction on your camera? She was walking out the door and she turned around so quick it was like the fuck Go check out the fans. You won't get that reaction in an audio recording because Dusty was silent in the background.
Speaker 3:Also you can see Dusty fucking dancing with the cat in the hallway.
Speaker 2:Hey, look at that, she's got a pussy that came out wrong.
Speaker 1:Whoops, party foul On the shit that's happening in Dragon's Dogma 2.
Speaker 2:What.
Speaker 3:I'm sorry.
Speaker 2:Maybe you should explain, because we're both stupid.
Speaker 3:Save some pussy for the rest of us.
Speaker 1:While I may get it, I can't save a lot.
Speaker 2:Do you remember telling us your vivid adventures last night, Whenever you were like super drunk. After you came back like after like two hours.
Speaker 1:Oh, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2:Okay.
Speaker 1:Okay, you came back like after like two hours.
Speaker 1:Oh yeah, yeah, okay, okay, uh, so dragon's dogma 2 just came out within the past couple of weeks, and I want to say within the last week, but it's under a lot of controversies right now because apparently there's a fuck ton of micro transactions, like there's a lot to see it. Uh, micro transactions for character customization, which, like the week before its release, they came out with like a free like hey, test out our character customization thing and a lot of people loved it and they're like, oh my god, this is going to be amazing. And then it came out and a lot of the shit people were using were locked behind a paywall and they're like what the fuck? And then they found out that like the ceo of whatever developer made dragon's dogma I forget their name but uh, he came out on record and said that he like didn't think fast travel was a good thing to put in dragon's dogma 2, even though it's supposed to have like a bigger map than the first one. And guess what? They locked behind a paywall for like three bucks did the pay?
Speaker 2:was it three dollars every time to pay for fucking faster.
Speaker 1:Was it every time?
Speaker 2:every time you have to spend three dollars to fast travel just to have the feature. Look, look, we're entering territory of fucking my gripe with how cars are selling features too. But fuck, I'm never getting this game. I don't even know what this series is, and it sounds terrible, it's kind of like have you ever played Shadow of the Colossus?
Speaker 1:I've heard of it, Great game. I would highly recommend it. It's a PlayStation 5.
Speaker 3:I think I watched you play it you watched. Xeno.
Speaker 2:I've watched bits and pieces of it.
Speaker 1:I just don't understand it it's one of those where there's no words, but you kind of piece together the story by what's kind of happening. See, that's my problem.
Speaker 2:I'm not creative anyway, so be more like hell divers fucking democracy.
Speaker 2:Yeah make the mic dude, they did microtransactions the right way. I didn't have to buy the first premium warm. I didn't even have to buy the first war bond because I played the game enough. Want to fucking unlock max, fucking put it behind a story. And they have, game master, joel, have the fucking stuff delayed. And then if you guys didn't finish your fucking work, you can just say, joel, make the order really hard, so they can't do it, and then it's like oh no surprise, popping in people's games it's actually not him.
Speaker 2:They're dev imposters who are riding the Joel train, but they're popping in people's games and it was like here, have fun. He dropped the fucking apc and then left. It's not even a thing that you can select. Yet people are like this is already in the game.
Speaker 1:They're like yeah we're just in the files. Have fun. Here's the thing it's fucking I don't know.
Speaker 2:I mean more games need to be more like helldivers yeah, just come out with a complete game let me just come out with it's not even.
Speaker 1:It's not even the fact that hell divers is complete, because no um, yeah, we don't need microtransactions to be effective and that was supposed to be a fucking halo game to a halo reach game.
Speaker 2:Hell divers right now has 235 497 in game. If you go look at it, how much does?
Speaker 1:halo infinite. Have right now on steam.
Speaker 2:I've do you want me to even bother searching here? Yeah, let me, I do. Let me share my screen for you guys so we can do this accurately. I just need to make sure that I manage my monitors correctly.
Speaker 1:Uh, yeah, let's do this yeah, all right, let's go ahead and watch this here, so now the viewers can also see.
Speaker 2:See this is how diverse tours look at the. Look at the chart. It's really not that bad of a drop, I mean, especially if you look at this, if you look at this chart. It's very I'd call that pretty consistent I would say so yeah let's go look at power world, which is also a great game.
Speaker 2:The I'm a human, I promise. Um, let me, let me pull up. It's in game. It's in game. Its problem is is it probably was only ever going to attract this much of a standing audience. Right, its problem is which is everybody talking about it at this big spike? But it's not really meant to be a long live service game. It's going to be one that gets new features over over updates. So what's actually going to happen is you're going to get this and then they're, they're going to. Yeah, they, they have. So that's so small that they they actually don't want to be that big, so they're happy. They thought they were going to get five. They would be happy if 5,000 people played this game and people are complaining. People are like oh no, it dropped so much. Yada, yada, yada.
Speaker 1:I'm like bro, it has to be expected with the type of game it is.
Speaker 2:It's a survival. It also is the second raid DLC or something that adds more to the game. It's going to jump back up into the millions easily, absolutely Like. This game is going to be one of those ones that jumps back up and you said look at Halo.
Speaker 1:Yeah, Halo Infinite.
Speaker 2:Halo.
Speaker 1:Because for most of me, the follow-up was basically what Helldivers 2 is.
Speaker 2:Palworld is still beating it. The follow-up was basically what hell divers 2 is? Pal world is still beating it. In fact, it has so little people in it that you can see the granularity in the twitch viewers on the graph oh yikes um, let's see, that's three months, that's six months, that's one year. Here's all-time high at release is less than Helldiver's current number of players.
Speaker 2:I gotta say yikes, that's tough um, and let's go look, let's. I also want to show you something cool that I noticed when I was looking at hell divers too cool that you noticed um. So you notice how you can hit the all button on the graph yes, yes, I did notice that look, who forgot to hide their id on Steam whenever they were testing it back here.
Speaker 2:Oh you can see that this is when they were running their internal tests on Helldivers 2 back in January 2018, when they had a build that they could start up. It's like this is fucking weird. Guess you should. I guess this is when they were testing Steam integration. But what's? The other game Is Dragon Dogma. Whatever it was, dragons dogma is that on steam it should be. Yeah, I think it's all platforms two, let's see, let's see there's it's got a 54 rating yeah, that's because the micro transactions uh, let's see here when did it release.
Speaker 2:Here it's going down pretty quick.
Speaker 1:I'm not surprised. It probably had a decent release and then people started realizing oh, if I want to do anything in this game, I have to pay real money.
Speaker 2:Holy fuck. Dragon Dogma 2 went below Cities Skylines and the only reason people are pissed at that is because it fucking isn't a complete game. That's just because colossal order apparently went public three years ago and they have to please shareholders oh, um so there you go on that one. Well, yeah, fuck. You don't add microtransactions to your game, does it have? Is this all the fucking microtransactions that exist in it? Because they have to list it in the steam dv that I'm aware of.
Speaker 2:Yes, points to spend beyond the rift uh. Restore warp location marker yep obtain a portal crystal which can be set as a destiny. You are a fucking piece of shit. This, literally, is just fancy words for fucking art of metamorphosis. Character editor. How much is this all?
Speaker 1:this shit. That should just be part of the base game it's a $2 fucking.
Speaker 2:It's a $2 fucking charge yep how much is the base game?
Speaker 3:uh, seventy dollars.
Speaker 2:Oh, get fuck yeah the base game is sixty, nine, ninety nine that you can eat my fucking ass, dude let's go look at the reviews for this game that's for can you take us to the steam and can you take us to the steam page?
Speaker 2:oh, come on, let's look, let's go to. Let's go to the Steam page. Oh, come on, let's go to the Steam page. It's got a 6 out of 10. What's your birth date? I'm not putting this publicly on the podcast but, surprise, I'm actually 1903. I'm actually from 1903. Uh, let's see here what are some of the reviews, because there have been some good ones. Oh, hang on, let's look. Do we want to look at the positive ones or the negative ones?
Speaker 1:oh, you know, negative ones start negative and then look at positives all right, uh, let's find review type negative game runs terrible oh yeah, I can't even meet 60 fps. I forgot to mention that that's good, oh my god oh, homeboy wrote a novel not reading it.
Speaker 2:Spoilers do you care about minor spoilers?
Speaker 1:I could give less of a fuck in summary, summed up as a disappointment.
Speaker 2:The short and sweet of it is what people wanted was a fixed, and it was a fixed, expanded version of drag ddda, which, whatever that means, uh dragon's dogma ascension or something uh, but it doesn't have better combat and it's a side grade or a downgrade.
Speaker 2:That's what this guy says. The game is incredibly, incredibly good and entertaining. Nobody is asking you to pay for microtransactions. This is only for individuals that are lazy and don't want to farm anything, as all currency in the game can be attained without difficulty. The only complaint I have from this game is that it's poorly optimized. Thumbs down until this is resolved. Sounds like that's just somebody who can't understand microtransactions. Apparently, they don't have skill slots. Play Dark Horizon instead, basically.
Speaker 3:Dragon's Dawn 1, but the story ends abruptly and is a lot worse.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's fun, but kind of doo-doo. Should we just go to Steam pages and do Steam reviews of shit? Like look at shit, what's a game that you think has terrible Steam reviews?
Speaker 1:Oh that is a good question. I know city skylines 2 has some pretty. I know city skylines 2 has all right. Let's take a look at city skylines 2?
Speaker 2:uh, they have. They have pissed off a lot of people. Do we look at the dl DLC that they just released?
Speaker 1:Wasn't it like Beachfront Property or something like that? Yeah.
Speaker 3:City Skylines 2.
Speaker 2:City Skylines 2.
Speaker 3:Everything is made up and nothing bad.
Speaker 2:Let me make this bigger for the viewers.
Speaker 1:Our one viewer that's going to go on Vansley now.
Speaker 2:It's the game equivalent of the DJ pushing all kinds of buttons on his mixer that's not plugged in, while an mpp mp3 just plays on his ipod that that's fucking incredible. Oh wait, we can. We can filter. Can we filter by like fucking funny, like like it's got the funny tag, like there's a funny tag? Can we? Can we sort by the people that found this review funny? Um? You would think we could you think we could it, lets me it. Lets me display as funny.
Speaker 2:I'm too lazy, firing my wood stove, so I got this to heat the room with. Oh, firing my wood stove, so I got this to heat the room with 900 watts, no one reads the review, so I will write that I am gay well, guess what only cams on twitch, we know oh my god, oh my god, product refunded best slide show I've ever purchased nobody can afford rent and there's too much traffic, so realistic recommend that's beautiful oh my god, dude, performance is fine.
Speaker 2:Buy a better pc. Nerds. Great new benchmarking software. Oh jesus christ, the fuck, it just left the cat. These are great, honestly. Um, let's go see what the dlc has in store, because I know they just released the dlc and I know that dlc has a uh, a separate, um sort of review system, I think yeah, I think it's separated yeah, at this point I think they're releasing the dlc only to avoid possible legal liabilities from those who bought the deluxe edition.
Speaker 2:Okay, let's see, can we search it? I guess that's how you forgot the C in DLC. The DLC is not a joke. That's not even worthy of review. Ps, this review has more content than this DLC would. Would recommend four trees would buy deluxe edition again. Yeah, they had. They added four trees in like two houses sheets. It's a DLC. You've, um, I think it's nine bucks, yikes. Uh, it's a DLC. You forgot the DNC and left us with a big L. Where's the beach for the beach properties? I bought it to support the developer. Four new palm trees, shows three. Let's go do this filter on dragon's dogma again all right we've entered a new realm of adhd.
Speaker 2:At this point, go to steam and find the worst reviews ever. All right, any bets on what the what the top review is gonna gonna talk about? Probably the frame right hey, cap Capcom, you can purchase a good review DLC for $1.99. Let's see Recommend, Just a recommend. I thought you had to get a review. I thought you had to put text in here. This looks like a spam.
Speaker 1:I thought you did too.
Speaker 2:This looks spammy. He's got way too many products um nothing. You'll never wonder where a ladder is. Again, product refunded. See you guys at the 50 sale uh that motherfucker left a novel yeah, I'm not reading novels. Look how they massacred my boy and turned him into a cast grab and murdered his soul. Should have just let him rest, but instead you dug him up, waved his corpse around with makeup on, like the rats you are.
Speaker 4:Damn.
Speaker 2:Oh, okay.
Speaker 1:Do not buy A ladder, a risen. Is that a joke in the game that I don't get?
Speaker 2:probably probably all right any other games that we want to look at, or we don't want this whole scheme uh, yeah, yeah, I want to look up.
Speaker 3:Funny on funny, negative on fucking Destiny 2 oh god, that's gonna.
Speaker 2:That's gonna be Phasmophobia, phasmophobia. People hate that game.
Speaker 3:Now, well, that's fine, we can look at the funny reviews and it'll probably be spooky funny very positive.
Speaker 2:Funny. When you look down, you can see your legs. Should I make them recent? Yeah, make them reason uh, how do I make it recent date range only? Specific range select on the graph above. Sure, give me this range. How do I have I done it?
Speaker 1:I don't know.
Speaker 2:Do I do this?
Speaker 1:Oh, there you go.
Speaker 2:Jesus Christ. We have to read this.
Speaker 1:What is this? I got this.
Speaker 2:You got this Okay.
Speaker 1:I had to eat at my favorite restaurant the other day. You know what I ordered. I got a mouth-watering hamburger. I waited 20 minutes for it to arrive and they gave me only the damn buns. I asked them what the hell.
Speaker 1:The waiter responds calmly sir, you must wait the rest. Uh, wait a minute, the grammar here is bad. Sir, you must wait the rest of the burger to arrive. I think it's. You must wait for the rest of the burger to arrive. I told him in an annoyed tone fine, as the evening progressed, I kept getting bits and pieces of the burger, first the lettuce, then the cheese. Once the patty finally came, they started taking parts of the cheese and top of the bun from me. I asked the waiter in a pissed tone what the fuck? Where are my top bun and cheese going? He told me, since your plate lacks sufficient room and you are no longer enjoying them, we are removing them from your plate.
Speaker 1:Now I'm stuck here with parts of the burger and throughout my service I get different types of the same toppings. First it was romaine lettuce, then it was iceberg, I get basic white bread buns, now I have brioche. I have lost all sense of time and understanding of what my meals should look like. The patty has grown cold and I swear I heard it mooing from the underdone half. This shit is coming out. Yeah, it just seems like they're just grumpy boys. I'm done reading this.
Speaker 2:I mean to be fair. They actually described sunsetting, but saying they took my cheese away. That's the antidote that they fucking made dude, this one's just a picture of a cat.
Speaker 1:A grumpy cat, nope, oh, I know. Look up the new South Park game, because apparently people aren't liking it.
Speaker 2:Wait, did it release?
Speaker 1:Yeah, it came out like a day or two ago.
Speaker 2:Oh is it South Park Snow Day.
Speaker 1:Yep, that's the one. People are not caring for it, okay.
Speaker 2:Three out of ten positives I like that looks nice, I like it looks nice. Cons, basically everything else. The jokes are turned toned down compared to the last two games. Yeah, how are you gonna top the fucking? The skin color? Was your difficulty slider right? That was pretty fucking great.
Speaker 1:But well, in all fairness, you're kind of being compared by two games that people really liked and really enjoyed, and this one apparently has like a card combat system which I mean could work.
Speaker 2:But oh god, is it south park's chain of memories? Yeah, it's south park chain of memory this looks like ass already looking at that, so wait.
Speaker 1:When I looked at this gameplay it looked like it could have been something okay. But then you watch people on twitch play and you're like, oh yikes, this is.
Speaker 2:This is not great yeah, so they're like lining up to fight thq nordic. Uh, what is? I'm playing it without sound. Oh, what? I mean? It doesn't look like a card. Oh god, this looks too much like a fucking thing is it?
Speaker 1:it brings it up and it mentions that it's a card combat, but when you're watching the gameplay, they take all like the hud away from you. Oh, yeah, I think there's also a multiplayer to this. Oh, or like you and your friends can play together. Yeah, like right there, like you have different cards that can change, like how the combat goes and shit. I don't know. It's fucking weird.
Speaker 2:I don't really understand it. Dumb as shit.
Speaker 1:I was slightly hoping this was going to be okay, but the moment it came out and when I started seeing the reviews, I was like I kind of anticipated this was going to happen. What about the new Alone in the Dark? It's supposed to have that one dude from fucking. What's that? One dude from uh, fucking uh. What's that? One netflix show. That's kind of spooky.
Speaker 2:That's not really describing much um uh, it's set in the 80s.
Speaker 1:Dungeons and dragons strange what?
Speaker 3:okay, I thought you were gonna make a joke about it.
Speaker 1:No, no, no, no, because it actually has one of the actors in it.
Speaker 2:I mean. Out of 611 reviews, it's mostly positive, Mostly positive.
Speaker 1:But I've also been hearing mostly meh things about it.
Speaker 4:Well, I mean it's 77%.
Speaker 1:This is the game that created survival horror.
Speaker 2:I mean it's at a 77%. It seems like it's just buggy. I mean that's a horror. It's at a 77%. It seems like it's just buggy. It seems like it's just buggy.
Speaker 1:Maybe once they fix it it'll be better. But it's supposed to have the police officer from Stranger Things in it. He plays like the dad. But it's supposed to be a remake. But it doesn't follow the original story at all, which I'm okay with Daddy.
Speaker 3:Hopper, daddy Hopper. Holly watched it. I stopped it. There he is.
Speaker 1:I only ever saw season one. I never saw anything past that.
Speaker 3:I watched one and two. I got an episode and a three and I was like I'm over it.
Speaker 2:So what do we do now? To shit on Xenomore?
Speaker 4:Hmm.
Speaker 2:Have we got any cool stories? I'm kind of running out of ideas for ADHD after dark.
Speaker 1:Uh shit, I'm trying to think of something to shit on Got tiny peepee. We all know that's a lie, super lie, it's too big, that fucking hog dr fart.
Speaker 2:You better run away. It's gonna never mind it's gonna hurt girl if you made it this far in the podcast you're gonna, you're gonna go, you're gonna want to go search the all the way through category on Pornhub.
Speaker 3:Back when me and Zeno worked together, there was a certain technician that everybody would always call him by his full name. The only reason is because he's so fucking over the top.
Speaker 2:So every time, Was it the Pipelair? God damn it no it was not.
Speaker 3:It was not the pipe layer god damn it. No, not the god damn guy. Um, this is the guy who gave me my fucking first ever random boner pill. It works like here.
Speaker 2:Take this and I'm like what's the one that made you shit your pants no, I didn't shit my pants, but it made me shit crazy.
Speaker 3:But yeah, it wasn't in his pants. Every time Zeno walks through the shop and a lot of times we'd walk through the shop together when we'd get out of a meeting, go out to have cars to look at and shit and we'd walk through the shop and every time this tech would completely stop what he's doing, turn around and just stand, put his hands on his hips and kind of like flex out his dick and stare at xeno's dick as he walked through the shop. Go, god damn it. Like if I had, if I had half that, I tell you what I do. I'd I'd have a thousand children. That's what I'd fucking do, jesus Christ. And this is at work. This is a professional setting and we would just call it a lot of times.
Speaker 3:Call by his last name too Be like dude. You're like love you. You're wild though You're crazy. And like like he'd come up and walk, put his arm around Zeno, just fucking with him, like he didn't really mean any of it and they were close, they worked together a long time and just like hang over the front of him and stare at his fucking bulge in his pants. I'm like I'm, I'm telling you, zeno, let me have some of that. Like just I'm, like I'm, I'm telling you, zeno, if it, let me have some of that like just I would do terrible things to people. It'd be awful, like how do you do that? How do you do it? Just all kinds of random wild questions about Zeno's huge dog.
Speaker 2:I want to see Zeno's huge dog. At one point I'm going to get a peek at it. He's not here. He can't say no.
Speaker 3:There's that one picture in that one chat, of that one time you could probably zoom up on it, just saying I mean, Murky could have almost seen it. I didn't. There was one time it was close. That was like season one content yeah, zeno's bed. I was up early and I was waiting for Zeno to wake up so we played video games and then I heard him. I was chilling in my room and heard Morton get up. I think she like went to the bathroom or something. I was like Bet Zeno's awake.
Speaker 2:You're gonna touch his dick. So I heard him getting around.
Speaker 3:Yeah. So I looked in the room and he was laying in bed under the covers. So as soon as I saw him, I just run and I jumped in bed, Grabbed him around the top and he's like dude, I'm fucking naked. I was like no, You're not fucking naked.
Speaker 2:You're not naked.
Speaker 3:I'm gonna fucking put my fucking hand up here. He's like. I'm telling you, he's like man, man, right now I am butt-ass naked underneath of this blanket. Mercury was like. I was like, oh well if you're naked. I thought. I was like, oh well, if you're naked, then fucking. I thought he was lying. So I started fucking with him around the blanket and said he's just holding on for dear life. He's like dude, I'm telling you I'm 100% naked. I'm like no. Well then Morgan walked in the room and was like does he know? You're fucking naked. Oh, got him on the bed.
Speaker 2:What would have happened if you did unveil the blanket and you were face to face with Dick?
Speaker 3:I probably would have ended up just offing myself. I could never be the man that he was. I could never be the best at anything, but there's still that wall. I've never be the man that he was and I could never be the best at anything, but there's still that wall. I've never seen it in person to where, like I, you know, you know there's no point in trying to really be the best at anything anymore.
Speaker 2:Yeah, has got too big of a dick.
Speaker 3:Yeah, oh, natural.
Speaker 2:He's blessed. I mean, he should really thank his mother for his huge dick.
Speaker 1:So you assume it comes from the mom.
Speaker 2:No, it actually does.
Speaker 1:Oh God damn it mom.
Speaker 2:Dick. Length is entirely determined by the X on the XY chromosome. Oh shit. Now I'm going to have to complain to my own mother yeah, that was randomly conversation going through tiktoks and, and and this was after we had talked about pp a bunch if you can hear me down there fuck you why did you do this to me?
Speaker 2:but I was fucking scrolling through one of those like those those things where it's like it pops up as like what is like one health fact that people don't know about, and I was swiping through the text and I got to one and I was like cause Gaz had made a joke about how my mom gave me a small dick. And then I found the tick tock and it was like some health person was like, yeah, so dick size is determined by the mother. And I was like Gaz.
Speaker 4:God damn it.
Speaker 2:God damn it.
Speaker 3:Gaz you better give her. If we have a boy, you better give him a big dick.
Speaker 2:Does that mean Zeno's mom has a huge clit?
Speaker 4:Are you kidding me? I don't want to. I don't think you're going to.
Speaker 2:Dude. Zeno's never going to know about that, but dr farts gonna fucking know that. We said that because xeno's not gonna listen to the podcast. But this fucking doctor farts gonna be like. So do you know? They asked if your mom has a huge clit.
Speaker 4:I think I killed Berkey.
Speaker 3:Okay.
Speaker 2:So the answer must be yes, because you laughed really hard. That was funny. I was not expecting that at all.
Speaker 3:Is that me? And that is not where that at all. What does that mean? That is not where my brain went.
Speaker 2:Where did you think I was going?
Speaker 3:Something about his dad maybe, I don't fucking know.
Speaker 2:Why would I say that if the fucking dick size comes from the mother?
Speaker 3:I just wasn't expecting clit size. I guess I don't know.
Speaker 1:So is she kind of like a female hyena?
Speaker 3:I've met Zeno's mom.
Speaker 2:I've never met Zeno's mom Multiple occasions Zeno's mom. No, actually super Probably for the best if I could just ask a question how big's your fucking clit? Yeah, I'm gonna go over to. If I can just ask a question how big's your fucking cleanse of podcasts?
Speaker 3:I'm like yeah. I'm gonna go over to his parents' house.
Speaker 2:Should I just message?
Speaker 3:Zeno what I just said. You guys I don't know. Here's the joke. Because Zeno will never hear this, I'm gonna have him 3D print me like a reporter's microphone and I'm going to use that to go ask Zeno's mom if she has a giant clip.
Speaker 2:Will you? I don't think you have the balls to do that.
Speaker 3:I'm going to message Zeno.
Speaker 2:I'm questioning your manhood. Right now, I'm messaging Zeno.
Speaker 3:This is he can't hear this. Oh no, he can't hear this. Everybody listening. Do not tell Zeno this.
Speaker 4:If this works, then this is now on your. This is now on your honor.
Speaker 2:If he can 3D print me, you know what. You should figure out a way to get E to meet Zeno's mom so that you have somebody there recording in secret. Unless you want me to fucking buy you a goddamn spy camera to record you asking this question and it will fucking cut back like it's fucking I don't know, fucking Borat whenever they're in the middle of fucking the Republican convention. I'm kidding, oh God, xena's going to be like why do you want this?
Speaker 4:Oh.
Speaker 2:I'm assuming if you're willing to ask Xena's mom this, she must be a pretty, pretty funny person.
Speaker 3:No, let's hope so. No, is she very religious no, I wouldn't say that, she's just really like are you gonna get punched in the face by her husband?
Speaker 4:I would say reserved ah I mean if I, if it happens I mean contact, right boy, I said it now yeah, I said it now.
Speaker 2:I gotta bite for it you had a chance to back out by saying no, when I said you don't have the balls to do this, and you went. I'm gonna message people right now, okay.
Speaker 3:Send it, see if I get a response.
Speaker 2:This, just in Murky, might not be on the podcast next week.
Speaker 1:Murky might be murdered.
Speaker 2:He might be recovering in the hospital from some unknown disease, the people down the street are gonna poison him with crack. Uh, is that still a thing? Are you still worried about the fucking people coming to murder you? What if I wake up tomorrow, if I don't wake up tomorrow, I didn't kill myself, don't you remember?
Speaker 3:that he said he's got it. So he said probably he has to get the bed on his 3D printer fixed.
Speaker 1:OK, keep saying that, but I don't know if that thing's ever going to get fixed.
Speaker 2:I think he just doesn't have the motivation to do it. I will buy you a reporter.
Speaker 3:I will buy you a reporter, mike no that's the thing it has to be made by Zeno.
Speaker 2:Okay.
Speaker 3:So then we can make excerpts of this clip of huge clits and 3D printed microphones.
Speaker 2:What am I going to title the episode? Because I obviously can't title it. Xeno's mom has a huge clit. I'm just gonna title the episode Xeno has a dot dot dot. It has nothing to do with the episode content. Besides, you know what? Xeno has a huge penis there. Now it can be about Xeno See, we did it has a huge has a huge dung blade.
Speaker 3:I mean I'm telling you a hog, it's gotta be. I'd put my next three paychecks on it and if I did that I'd be homeless. So I'd win.
Speaker 2:I would win all that money, all of that money since Zeno's dick is so big, whenever he shakes it at the urinal is it big enough to make a sound wave, so like does his dick.
Speaker 1:I wouldn't say that you hear it, but you feel it.
Speaker 2:Does his dick have a resonant frequency?
Speaker 3:I say he has to back up or else it slaps the back of the urinal.
Speaker 2:Dude, could you imagine Zeno's dick is long enough to do a slap bass with it? That'll teach you never to miss a podcast again, zeno. He never did give a reason why he's gonna be late or he might miss, so I'm assuming it's girl reasons.
Speaker 1:Probably A loser.
Speaker 2:What a fuck, a fuck oh murky's gone. Speaking of losers, murky's gone. He muted himself. What a piece of team game boat. What are we doing that again? Uh, probably soon oh soon by teaching for sure do you have anything lined up? Are you interviewing anywhere?
Speaker 1:I have applied to a fuck ton of different places as of not yesterday but the day before, just waiting to hear back, hopefully soon. Fingers crossed, I would like to. Personally, I would like to still do something that's near the realm of education, because that's my wheelhouse. But I also want my money because I like to eat.
Speaker 2:You're not going to get paid if you do education. Sorry to say it, bud, I know, holy fucking chonk. Oh, that's a chonky boy, dude. He's got a huge dick too, that's bigger than mine. Do you see the dick coming between his legs? Big boy, which one is that? Is that King?
Speaker 3:It must, I bet Zeno's mom birthed him.
Speaker 1:Does Zeno's mom have a gun?
Speaker 2:I'm sorry what.
Speaker 3:Huge dick cat.
Speaker 2:Did you just say Zeno's mom birthed the cat? Zeno's mom birthed a cat Zeno's mom.
Speaker 3:Version of a cat birthed a cat Version. Version of a cat Cat with a huge clit, pussy clit.
Speaker 2:I don't know. Hey, just because I thought of it. Did you know that there's a theory that there's a universe that exists out there? If you can think of the thing, then it's a universe that exists out there. If you can think of the thing, then it's a universe that exists. So there's a universe where everybody in this chat right now has a clit.
Speaker 1:Oh, is it fun to play with.
Speaker 2:I mean, there's also a universe out there where it's fucking. When you have sex as a human, you die Because I thought of it.
Speaker 1:So we're all bees.
Speaker 2:No, no, no. The male's penis falls off and you bleed out from the erection.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so we're bees.
Speaker 2:Nope, Nope, because bees they like. They're a stinger.
Speaker 1:They're supposed to fucking explode.
Speaker 3:Probably I mean, but that's in response. That's attacking. Speaking of other terrible theories do you want to hear another fucking weird theory explode? That's probably I mean, but that's in a response like that's attacking.
Speaker 2:That's not speaking of other terrible theories. Do you want to hear it? Do you want to hear a terrible? Another fucking weird theory? Uh, that, uh there's.
Speaker 2:It's the whole thing about quantum tunneling, I think, or quantum existence, but like you can never die, uh god, I would hate that like if you die the way quantum mechanics work is you would just go into another universe where you didn't die from the thing that you did so. Like to everybody else, you're dead, but like you never die. Which means like if you ever tried to commit suicide and failed, there might be there. You might have actually just quantum tunneled to another universe where you, instead of passing you failed.
Speaker 3:You failed.
Speaker 1:I mean. I already failed a lot of stuff.
Speaker 2:But yeah, so there's like the whole theory that you actually never die. So that means there's no universe out there where fucking George Washington is like 400 years old.
Speaker 1:Oh yikes, Is there a universe where Murky saw his mom, or I was about to say there is a universe where Murky's mom beat cancer, fucking A?
Speaker 3:I don't think she had.
Speaker 2:I mean yeah, yeah, but in the universe that we're, in everything else, like they're dead to us, but like to them, they split off to another universe where they didn't die.
Speaker 4:Oh.
Speaker 2:It's really weird. Quantum mechanics are fucking weird.
Speaker 1:Just like ghosts. Ghosts are fucking weird man.
Speaker 3:Ghosts are fucking weird man.
Speaker 1:I mean yeah.
Speaker 2:Supposedly you could throw a baseball so fast that it would go through the material, that it was like a bat. If you could throw a baseball fast enough, it would go through the bat.
Speaker 1:I've always heard the theories that you could smack a table so many times and one of those times your hand would go through the material yeah, there's.
Speaker 2:There's actually a non-zero percent chance at any given time that, uh, you would become fused to an object that you're touching. It's a non-zero percent chance.
Speaker 1:It's very small those times where you like bite into something that shouldn't be crunchy, but you hear a crunch and you're like what the fuck?
Speaker 2:I mean, that could be it.
Speaker 3:That's dirt.
Speaker 2:That's probably dirt, your mom's dirt. There's also a non-zero chance that the I was going to say in the dirt she got cremated.
Speaker 3:I mean, she's ashy.
Speaker 2:There's also a non-zero chance that the vacuum of the universe just, instead of becoming a false vacuum, becomes a full vacuum, and the whole universe just collapses at any given second, in the blink of an eye.
Speaker 3:Welcome to Science with Coco, because he's way smarter than Murky Da-da-da-da.
Speaker 2:Da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da Also. You want to hear another thing, you also. You want to hear another thing. You know how you see. You also know how you see in sci-fi films, where they talk about like an ancient civilization and all this stuff, and you know, uh, how they left a bunch of shit behind and yada, yada, yada. Yeah. Well, we're so far at the beginning of the universe that we would likely be that ancient civilization.
Speaker 3:Oh, universe that we would likely be that ancient civilization, oh Brain.
Speaker 1:So what you're saying is Murky needs to start leaving more booty pics so they can be like oh dude. I should the ancient civilization used to send booty pics to each other.
Speaker 2:The ancient asshole.
Speaker 3:You know the big like screw in card cases. Yeah, you know, what I'm talking about. We're gonna take full, like boudoir, photos of my ass and we'll put each of them individually into said enlarged cases. I'm thinking maybe 3x2 ish you know good enough to hang on the wall, probably in someone's man cave, because it's such a fat ass. I think that's how we make our money.
Speaker 2:Maybe it's not the fans, maybe we just show pussy pics like this? Yeah, maybe.
Speaker 1:Maybe we should show pussy pics like that.
Speaker 2:Look at this People love pussy.
Speaker 1:Look at this baby.
Speaker 3:So we're all going to collectively start videotaping our cats, our pussies, our pussies. We're going to get all the clips together and we'll make some. If TikTok doesn't get banned, maybe a TikTok account. If not, we'll just put it on every porn site imaginable and exploit our animals for money and buy animals. That's what we're going with.
Speaker 2:I'm distracted by Kitty right now. Look at him.
Speaker 1:Can we talk about Zeno's most recent addiction and how I'm afraid?
Speaker 2:he's not going to pay his mortgage. He keeps saying that he's going to be able to have food. I'm like bro you spend more on Shadowverse than I have on Pokemon in a single month, and you make so much less than I do.
Speaker 1:For our listeners and, hopefully soon, our fansly watchers.
Speaker 2:A couple of weeks ago, coco came into town with his fiancee and we that was apparently the worst mistake that I've made for xeno's life yes and you guys should have left when I did none of this would have happened none of this would have happened if you guys turned around and kept walking.
Speaker 1:I'm the one who stalled and I wanted to look at new card games because I wanted to get into a card game. I was thinking maybe Magic, because I used to play that in college, but everybody wanted to get into Yu-Gi-Oh. I didn't want to play Yu-Gi-Oh. I fucking hate Yu-Gi-Oh. Yeah, there's too much gameplay of it and it's just not my thing anymore. Plus, the community is really, really stinky and I have a thing about smells and yeah, no, I would not be nice to somebody who legitimately smells like ass that I'm playing. I would tell that motherfucker, please leave the table right?
Speaker 3:yeah, I want to make a scene, but please forfeit, dude, if someone else comes over here and smells you like they're gonna do, well, I don't want to embarrass you.
Speaker 1:Like just go and then, to nobody's surprise, zimbro sees anime girls and goes, oh ooh, that art's pretty. And talks to the guy behind the counter about what that was and if he could explain a little bit more of it. And lo and behold, it was Shadowverse.
Speaker 1:So if you don't know Shadowverse, it's kind of sort of like Hearthstone it's the closest game I can compare it to and there's a ccg of it. That's the video game version. That's just okay. I prefer the physical version over the video game version. But you know, everybody has their kings.
Speaker 1:So Zeno and I get a starter deck. A few days go by, you know, I don't think anything of it, I just kind of casually walk into it. And then there's fucking Zeno who just decided to go fucking balls deep into this, fucking Blows up, finds out about the fucking lore of the game and he's like looking up different strategies for the different deck that he has and all the different builds. And I'm like, well, shit, I better look into my fucking builds and whatnot. And then he talks me into going into these like locals. That was at the same place that we bought the fucking cards at. Lo and behold, first day that we go. We think it's just supposed to be casual play. No, that motherfucker's a tournament. I get my ass handed to me. I'm bent over the fucking table by what those guys basically did to me. Still, very sweet guys, very nice community, uh. But yeah, like homeboy has probably spent his amount in his mortgage and fucking trading.
Speaker 2:How much do we think his mortgage is?
Speaker 1:I mean he got it before the super inflation at a decent amount on his bank. So I'm going to say maybe somewhere between 400 to a grand.
Speaker 2:Yeah, he's definitely spent like a grand in a month.
Speaker 1:If you made this phone.
Speaker 2:He also bought Funkos that day too.
Speaker 3:Yes, he's really very smart with all of his finances and shit. I don't think he put himself in a bad place like that he's definitely spent more than he should have. You live to your means.
Speaker 2:Sometimes you have a problem.
Speaker 3:He ain't got no kids.
Speaker 2:Yeah, but all he does is eat DoorDash and fucking crumble cookies All the time.
Speaker 3:Tell me that he's actually Fucking. Get through all the other shit and get here you crumble cookie Eating ass bitch With your strawberry shortcakes.
Speaker 2:Did you know they're coming out? Did you know they're coming out With chocolate chips? Did you know they're coming out? Did you know they're coming out with chocolate chips? Did you know that they're coming out with a new flavor of crumble cookie that I think Xeno's going to really like? That is called Mom Clit. Oh, personally designed and tasted by his mother.
Speaker 4:Sign me up, oh God.
Speaker 2:You gotta ask Shannon first. I wanna see you turn around and be like hey, shannon, can I try this new ice cream called Mom Clit? It's supposed to taste like Xeno's Mom's Clit.
Speaker 1:Oh, she would probably be extremely confused first and then be like fuck, no, do it, coward. Yeah, you're right, I am a coward, I don't want my ass kicked, don't you lie.
Speaker 2:You love getting your fucking ass beat. You sub Only if it's by the homies.
Speaker 2:You submissive, fucking inbreedable sexy man I would know hey, you would know you also, you also tried to, you also tried to date a fucking train wreck date a fucking train wreck and I was in a deep pit of sad boy status there yeah, my sister's not the greatest person, but like when I had to look at him and bro to bro and was like I'm not looking at you and being like don't hit that, because she's my sister, I'm like don't hit that because it's a mistake it was a if you value, you want to live life in your sanity.
Speaker 1:That's the wrong choice. It was a If you value, do you want to live life and your sanity?
Speaker 2:you're not going to go near that that was also around the same time that you had Breeding Kink Lady after you.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that was Breeding Kink Lady, an interesting time.
Speaker 3:That shows some of the messages you read.
Speaker 2:I remember you shared her picture with me and she was like oh, she's into you too.
Speaker 1:And I was like yeah, no, and I think she was just looking for anything that had a pair of functioning testicles to impregnate her and was just like, yeah, that'll do.
Speaker 2:That's weird as fuck.
Speaker 1:Very weird.
Speaker 2:Oh, Berkey made another one.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I didn't. My first drink was like when we started.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I'm not. I need to make another one, but I need to run the podcast.
Speaker 1:I'm still on my first drink, but I also have bourbon right next to me and a shot glass, so we'll see how tonight goes.
Speaker 2:I mean I'll get another one after the podcast is over. Oh, speaking of, I'm going to start making Dyson Sphere program stuff, because City Skylines isn't getting my wiener heart anymore. Alright, so why Dyson?
Speaker 1:Sphere Like isn't that fucking vacuums?
Speaker 4:I mean, it's a crafter it's a building crafter simulation game, it's a simulation.
Speaker 2:have you seen fact? Have you seen?
Speaker 1:factorio, because education is non-profit have you seen factorial factorio? Yeah, you and I played that on game, have you?
Speaker 2:also. Have you also seen satisfactory? Yeah, it's just in that realm of games.
Speaker 2:It's literally just that, but like you're building a Dyson sphere, oh but I was watching like cause I played it when it first came out and it didn't have any combat. It was super basic Like it was like a truly early access game, but it had a lot of stuff in place and I saw I saw Kibbitz playing it the other day and I was like they added enemies and then it was fucking wild. Oh, I kind of want my youtube channel to be in and around that genre like the simulation builder kind of game, which is why I went with that, uh that, because city skylines 2, while it is like performing pretty well, it's just boring just not what you're hoping for that's boring understandable like there's not.
Speaker 2:I've run out of stuff to do I like, but I can't like off my city and restart because I don't have the ability to just spawn a disaster whenever I want to. So I can't go crazy coco, like I did for the other city, and nuke my city and then restart with the stuff that I've learned, and I don't want to fucking send my city off without being able to do that.
Speaker 1:You know, I just recently by recently, like right before this fucking podcast was talking to Shannon and I had sad boy brain. Today, I'll admit I'm not afraid to say it, but one of the sad boy ADHD thoughts that kind of just came in was like say it. But one of the sad boy adhd thoughts that kind of just came in was like there's a part of me that absolutely does miss having my own content creation that I have the control of and that you know I was having fun with, I could do xyz with, but I also realized that it was also an escape from my abusive ex-wife. Uh, but that's neither here nor there, and it was one of those that I think I miss having some kind of creative control over something and being able to express my own creativity, because I can't do fucking art. I have no fucking we could revive.
Speaker 2:we could revive gameboat and you can edit if you wanted to do that, because I don't have time to edit but I know how hard it is to record single content, but when you get two people together it becomes 80,000 times easier to record. And then editing. Then the editing part is hard because it's like I don't know what to fucking cut because it's all fucking good, like that's what Toast's problem was, and I was like Toast. I kind of expect you to take that two hour footage and make like two episodes out of it. He made four. But yeah, we can revive Gameboat.
Speaker 3:OK, so all four of those are just one one session.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it was like two hours yeah yeah, yeah that we recorded in, like all those 2021 sat down that's why whenever there was like an emulator issue, it didn't get fixed, because we were like let's just record a bunch, because toast is going to edit a bunch or what he said he was going to edit a bunch toast. If you're listening to this, stop. You shouldn't be. I will find out, because if he's listening to this, I demand him to message me oh demand him and if you don't?
Speaker 2:if you don't, I have ways of finding out. If you listen to me.
Speaker 4:I know you're right remember that remember that.
Speaker 2:I still know his name because I just sent money to his PayPal Still has his full name on there. Also, remember that time when you joined the Minecraft server.
Speaker 1:He also stole my PayPal, because I gave him money too.
Speaker 2:Yeah, remember that time you joined my server and I saw you where you were joining from and it was a VPN, and I figured out the exact VPN you were joining from from the IP so, yeah, uh, toast, make sure you're not listening to this baby. Yeah, you shouldn't be when you turn 18, I don't care police yeah, when you turn 18, I don't care, um, because this is definitely a 18 plus podcast, because we literally talked about xeno's mom, mom's clit but as I shouldn't, lie, but anyway, revive game boat, then you don't have to worry about there's like also the solo stuff that I kind of miss.
Speaker 1:Like I do miss e to an extent, but I feel like he's dead. I'm not gonna revive that shit after I'm done teaching. I'm like, yeah, I don't know if I would want to touch that with a 10-foot pole, because I feel like if I revive that, I mean the solo stuff. You could just stick to streaming you found shit with like no, oh, he's back online again. They're going to just be fucking assholes and I don't know.
Speaker 2:Yeah, but here's the thing. Here's the thing If you revive, not teaching anymore, you have moderators who can ban them and then if they keep making accounts, you can report those moderators can report them to twitch and teach the kids a variable, very valuable lesson about online harassment but I think they are my number one concern is I want to have a balance.
Speaker 1:I want to make sure that I have time for shannon, I want to make sure that I have time for my hobbies and I want to have a balance. I want to make sure that I have time for Shannon, I want to make sure that I have time for my hobbies and I want to make sure I have time for my friends in between that, but most of my hobbies would also include friends.
Speaker 2:Shadowverse. Let me tell you this much you definitely have a lot of time with Shannon. Like you have a lot more time with Shannon, like you have a lot of you have a lot more time with Shannon than I think you realize. And if you wanted to pick up streaming for like, even just like a couple hours for one day of the week, I don't think it would be the end of the world.
Speaker 1:No, it certainly wouldn't be.
Speaker 2:Because I, murky Murky, can attest to this. Don't get me wrong. I've seen the amount of fucking snapchats you've sent me of places that you've gone to and I'm like how the fuck do they think of doing this shit? I wish I was creative. I'm like, I'm like man guys, why can't we fucking think of shit like this, like that looks cool as fuck, although, I mean, the problem with me is there's nothing within a fucking 15 mile radius, but but like still, he's like sending pictures of a fucking garden in the middle of nowhere with butterflies and insects, and I'm like, well, fuck, god damn, I wish I could go.
Speaker 1:It's just one of those. I really enjoy parks, I really enjoy walking around exploring new places, and that just kind of fits into that.
Speaker 2:Yeah, places, and that just kind of fits into that.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I mean like you have always liked being cool insects, animals, birds, you know all kinds of different shit that you know, random places that you're not used to but yeah, I think having one day to stream wouldn't be that bad.
Speaker 2:Like I'm not even saying we stream for game boat anymore. We just make short form content, right, or not? Short form content? Uh, fucking youtube videos, and then you can edit you. You can edit a youtube video on your own time correct and that gets your creative outlet for editing because I know you don't like recording solo content.
Speaker 2:I know you like streaming solo content, from what I gathered, yeah, when I was on YouTube, it was just. Especially your Ronnie shit. Your Ronnie shit was fucking great. You control that fucking raccoon like it is an extension of your body and I don't know how.
Speaker 1:It's just knowing the next thing that's going to come out of your mouth.
Speaker 2:Yeah, but I don't. I don't. When I said the thing about Zeno's mom's clit, I didn't know that was going to come out. It just happened. It must be helpful because you're a teacher and you have to kind of understand what's going to come out of your mouth.
Speaker 2:And I'm a programmer I've had had a lot of self-control with the shit that comes out of my mouth. I can't wait to hear of ease last day, when he made a fucking teenager cry because they were fucking stupid chew them out for being a complete asshole, my last day I'll get, I want to let you know I hope you become a better person, because you're a fucking piece of shit, right.
Speaker 4:For a second.
Speaker 3:I think about you and I hope that's more thought. Is everything all right at home, the rest of your family? Because I swear to God, the only reason you're doing this is because something is fucked up. But I fucking hate. I hate you so much. You're garbage. I bet your family's garbage your siblings trash, cousins trash, aunts, uncles trash, anybody else you even think about and moderately like weak as fuck. Nobody likes you. You're only there for a quick laugh and then you have nobody.
Speaker 2:I hope everything works out in the end, but right now, fuck you for you, for the first, like the first, the first sentence I wrote called teacher's rant the first sentence of that murky, I thought you were like legitimately, like giving e like feedback, about like hoping he becomes a better person. And then you said, because you're fucking trash. And I was like, well, clearly he's doing something else, because there's no way he just said that to e. Because you said it was like you said it in the tone, I was like, oh, he's adding more to E. I hope he becomes a better person. Wait what?
Speaker 4:did he say?
Speaker 1:Speaking of Shadowverse, even though we talked about that like 20 minutes ago. Murky, are you joining on?
Speaker 3:Friday yeah.
Speaker 2:I'm throwing down, You're throwing down this Chicago tournament. Am I going to be in it?
Speaker 3:I might be lucky three or four times, I don't know. Do you want to be in?
Speaker 2:it. I can be in it if somebody can teach me how to play Havencraft Also. Take a look at this that we got at the con.
Speaker 1:I will fucking teach you.
Speaker 2:I'll even bring out't, really focus it. It's a.
Speaker 3:PSA 10. You have to leave pretty early Friday.
Speaker 2:I was talking about the one in Chicago.
Speaker 3:Oh, I'm stupid.
Speaker 4:Yeah, we got a couple of cards.
Speaker 2:Chicago would be like you fucking know what you're doing, kind of stuff. But I mean, I don't, I don't, you guys could just come visit and alternatively Right, and then we don't, you guys can just come visit, alternatively and then we don't go to Chicago
Speaker 3:we've been looking for a reason to come out and fucking.
Speaker 2:I know Zeno wants to do the Chicago thing, but like I don't know about you guys, but I don't really want to go to Chicago.
Speaker 1:I mean I'm okay with.
Speaker 3:Chicago dude, I hate, I'm okay with.
Speaker 1:Chicago.
Speaker 3:Dude, I hate the city of Chicago. I hate driving there like my mom had to go for treatments.
Speaker 2:Dude, we couldn't get back to our hotel one time because I think it was like Mexican Independence Day or whatever, like in October, like during the riot fest or whatever.
Speaker 1:Oh, san Diego, de or whatever mile no, it was in october.
Speaker 2:No, no, there were a bunch of people that were I don't know how to say this without sounding weird, but let me try to just say it and you can fix it, because I'm autistic and can't describe things okay but there were a bunch of people in, like september october, who were mexican, running around the city flying the mexican flag, shooting fireworks out of their cars, like they were all doing this in support of mexico and I heard from somebody that it was mexican independence day, so I don't know what it could have been, but that's what happened and they were shooting fireworks, like roaming candles and shit, out of cars in the middle of downtown fucking chicago. And so, like the next day, as part of the festival, they closed the entire white portion of chicago so we couldn't get an uber back to our hotel, which happened to be in the white, pretentious part of chicago the mexican war of independence was september 16th, correct through september 27th of 1810 to 1821 that's, that's what they were.
Speaker 2:That's what they were shooting, then shooting off fireworks, for they weren't shooting. Actually, I don't, I couldn't, I couldn't even tell you if they weren't shooting guns straight up in the sky. It's, it's chicago. They were probably shooting fucking pistols into the sky, you never know, yeah, but we were driving home and there was a car right in front of us that had a huge fucking Mexican flag on the roof and they were launching fucking 40-millimeter fucking fireworks out of the fucking rubber tubes that they were just holding out the window. And this was in the middle of downtown chicago and, like both sides of us were high rises and I was like they definitely just blew out some windows. But yeah, so the next day they closed. Next day, next day, the uh, yeah, pretty much the next day the police had closed down the entire, like I said, white part of chicago for the right hallways yeah, for the quiet hours which happened to be where my hotel was was in that area and our uber driver couldn't.
Speaker 2:There was no path for our uber uber driver to get from where we were to our destination. We were like, just fucking, he kept trying to go around and we were like, just get us to where it's a straight walk. And, uh, we'll do that, because it was like one in the morning and I just wanted to go back at this point in time, right. So we were just like, just drop us off please yeah, can you give me the two to three blocks?
Speaker 3:I'm like I can dip the fuck there can you stay here a second, if fucking, if I run. But yeah, call somebody. Well, I mean, once we, once you, I Can you sit here for a?
Speaker 2:second, if I run, can you call somebody? I mean, I had him drop us as close to the hotel section as possible where the police were guarding, because I was like, here's my thought If we go inside of the white portion, we're going to be safe because the police are going to shoot anybody else.
Speaker 4:Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha Ha ha ha. Police are going to shoot anybody else.
Speaker 2:Am I wrong? This is how fucked up America is. This is how fucked up America is. My skin color was my passport to the other side of the bridge. It's not wrong, but it is kind of wrong. But they didn't even question it. They had a fucking road blockade of fucking construction vehicles blocking people. Instead of having police cars, they brought their fucking road salt crews out, because the vehicles were bigger and people couldn't push through them with a car. And then we walked by it and like a bunch of police officers and they were like oh hey, and we just kept going. They didn't question anything. I guarantee you, if I had any sort of brown complexion close to that of switch, they'd'd have been like nah, son, this isn't your place, am I wrong?
Speaker 1:I'm not gonna comment on that one.
Speaker 3:I don't feel like I was in Chicago. It was either at an airport or back when I took my mom to her fucking med things. And the last two times I took her to this place in Chicago for like infusions I got fucking cookies and ice cream and heard a fucking shooting and got to make sure my mom got her potassium all in the same day. Like it was just a random combination and it happened twice and those were the only two times I ever went there. It's weird that it happened twice.
Speaker 3:It was in like old Chinatown I think, something fucking dude, I don't know. Like middle of the day, middle of the day, and I left super fucking early, hour and a half before fucking scheduled arrival, hour and a half before the appointment. You know what still happened Late, you know why? Because traffic is ass cheeks. Yeah, you gotta leave like two days early for Chicago traffic, hate it. But yeah, I'll definitely help you out with.
Speaker 1:Havencraft, it's just but yeah, I'll definitely help you out with Havencraft, it's just fucking over your opponent as much as possible.
Speaker 2:I'm gonna fuck Murky's mouth as over as possible with my tiny my dick's small enough it might be considered a clit there was spit in the end of my tongue, I promise alright, I think we dragged this out long enough, zeno you suck, okay, goodbye everybody, goodbye everybody. Fuck you, zeno. You know what I bet? You have a huge asshole. Goodbye, goodbye.