In this thrilling episode of our podcast, titled "The Owenverse Is Back," we dive headfirst into the delightful and surreal world of My Little Pony fanfictions, where we share a laugh reading some of the most peculiar ones aloud. We transition into a humorous segment that sees us lightly roasting Xeno for his questionable decision to forego sunscreen on a recent kayaking trip. Be sure to lather up next time, Xeno!
We shift gears to discuss our friends at Joysticks United, reminiscing about their uniquely inventive Power Rangers DnD session. It's a tale you won't want to miss, and we urge listeners to check it out on their podcast page.
As we plunge back into the "Owenverse," we find ourselves facing off against the enigmatic Roy O'Bannon, leader of Wheelchairs for the Blind. When our battle concludes, we're shocked as he makes an unexpected pivot to join our motley crew.
We close the chapter with John, alias Merky, stuffed unceremoniously into the trunk of our trusty Lightning McQueen, under Coco's watchful gaze. Our journey takes us to the mysterious statue of a weeping Owen Wilson, where this whirlwind of an episode concludes. Buckle up, listeners; it's a wild ride through the Owenverse this week.
Twitter - https://twitter.com/DarkAfterAdhd
In this thrilling episode of our podcast, titled "The Owenverse Is Back," we dive headfirst into the delightful and surreal world of My Little Pony fanfictions, where we share a laugh reading some of the most peculiar ones aloud. We transition into a humorous segment that sees us lightly roasting Xeno for his questionable decision to forego sunscreen on a recent kayaking trip. Be sure to lather up next time, Xeno!
We shift gears to discuss our friends at Joysticks United, reminiscing about their uniquely inventive Power Rangers DnD session. It's a tale you won't want to miss, and we urge listeners to check it out on their podcast page.
As we plunge back into the "Owenverse," we find ourselves facing off against the enigmatic Roy O'Bannon, leader of Wheelchairs for the Blind. When our battle concludes, we're shocked as he makes an unexpected pivot to join our motley crew.
We close the chapter with John, alias Merky, stuffed unceremoniously into the trunk of our trusty Lightning McQueen, under Coco's watchful gaze. Our journey takes us to the mysterious statue of a weeping Owen Wilson, where this whirlwind of an episode concludes. Buckle up, listeners; it's a wild ride through the Owenverse this week.
Twitter - https://twitter.com/DarkAfterAdhd
Well, I'm maybe.
Speaker 1:I don't know what's going on. What are we doing?
Speaker 2:It's after dark, we never know what's going on. Yeah, what do you mean? That is fair.
Speaker 1:Merky, where are you at? What's your big booty at?
Speaker 3:I'm here. I'm trying to steal my chair back from Dusty.
Speaker 1:Oh, is she playing the Sims?
Speaker 4:How's that go.
Speaker 1:Sounds like he's losing.
Speaker 5:It does sound like he's losing. It really does Like when you're trying you should have said I'm taking my chair back. That's where you lost, merky.
Speaker 3:Yeah, you're right, you're right.
Speaker 1:You're right, I'm just an honor. Oh, she might like that.
Speaker 3:Yeah, yeah, this booty, it's my crush her though.
Speaker 5:Yeah, I was like you don't want to hurt the girl, you just want to scare her a little bit.
Speaker 1:Jesus Christ, oh, he muted himself.
Speaker 5:Oh Jesus Trouble.
Speaker 1:Either he's getting abused or he's doing the abusing.
Speaker 5:Either way, there's a Daddy Dusty is whooping his ass right now.
Speaker 1:Daddy Dusty is fucking kicking that booty. Yeah, Daddy.
Speaker 5:Dusty, don't fuck around. Oh, he's back, he's back. She must have left the room.
Speaker 3:Did you get?
Speaker 1:your chair back.
Speaker 3:Yes, excellent.
Speaker 5:Excellent.
Speaker 1:How did you get it back? Did you beat Dusty?
Speaker 3:Your force. So, you beat Dusty.
Speaker 1:Yeah, go back, Hands oh shit, oh shit, I really thought you were racist. I didn't know you were fucking wife Peter.
Speaker 5:Yeah, that damn Fucked up.
Speaker 3:She just got up and then she said that her but her from sitting in the chair for so long Makes sense.
Speaker 1:OK, she just didn't want to kick your ass.
Speaker 5:Yeah, right, he's like I'm tired from working all day. Not going to whip your ass right now Running your friends.
Speaker 3:My cauliflower ears, not actually from wrestling, it's just from getting hit in the head with dodgeballs too much. As a young child, you're supposed to dodge the balls. Yeah, but I was, I was fat and I couldn't yeah.
Speaker 5:that makes sense. It's hard life for you.
Speaker 3:That's your kids, you know.
Speaker 5:Hard not life, hard not life.
Speaker 1:You get one time at Bandcamp. Remember when we were talking about that the other day and Dusty learned a lot of stuff about Bandcamp.
Speaker 5:Yeah, yeah, I do remember that that was pretty fucking funny.
Speaker 1:She was like they don't do that on the bus.
Speaker 5:He's like you remember so and so yeah yeah, that should have happened.
Speaker 1:No, no, she was in complete denial. So Zima is playing the forest.
Speaker 4:Here he is, and what's the most out of it.
Speaker 2:So I could be a good noodle and pay attention, because otherwise Far has going to complain.
Speaker 1:I called me last week because we didn't record ADHD after dark, have you guys? Ok, yeah, he was like why didn't you guys record? Like like where's the podcast? What am I supposed to do? And I was like it was like we didn't, we didn't record it last night. He's like what am I supposed to do? And I was like I don't know, don't call me though.
Speaker 2:So I'm sorry for your luck. They're buck, I don't know.
Speaker 1:Anyway, fuck you for her.
Speaker 5:I'm going to fuck you for her. I'm going to call you.
Speaker 1:I'm going to call you whenever you're short, so every day.
Speaker 3:Yeah, we want to fuck you.
Speaker 1:Yeah, Wait what we said.
Speaker 3:Wait, wait, yeah. What'd you guys say?
Speaker 1:I said fuck you for her. You said we want to fuck you for her.
Speaker 3:That's why I call it Never mind. Fuck you for her.
Speaker 5:There we go yeah well, let's, let's revisit it. Shall we yeah. I'd fuck him for his man Not totally rule out that we want to fuck Farah.
Speaker 1:I'd fuck him for his man boobs.
Speaker 5:Miss. Where do you stand on this?
Speaker 4:I don't think I've ever seen Farah but I'll find.
Speaker 1:All right, fucking far, in so far I drop your panties. We're fucking you.
Speaker 5:Baby, you know, you wear a G string.
Speaker 1:I think Farah has the shortest one of all of us too.
Speaker 2:He's going to really hate them.
Speaker 1:I'm going to remind him all the time because he hates it.
Speaker 3:Seeper Lee has a shame, Can he's going to want you to call him short while you're? Oh my God.
Speaker 1:He also hates being called Joey. So, short ass Joey, looking motherfucker like that, so start calling him Joey.
Speaker 5:I'm going to get him like a kangaroo Joey costume.
Speaker 1:Oh, my God.
Speaker 2:So for our listeners, please go on to Twitter, Do at Farah gaming and say what's up, Joey he would fucking hate it.
Speaker 1:I would love it. Oh, let's go, let's do it. Hey, you know, you've got guests in the base I see that. Yeah, I am there. Who? Hey? Look, there you are. There's that handsome man.
Speaker 2:That little bae. Oh, my hair is a freaking mess though.
Speaker 1:It's not like anybody's going to see it.
Speaker 2:Am I here to mess?
Speaker 3:too, I actually don't have a shirt on right now and I'm not wearing underwear, hey yo yeah, we're underwear on the podcast.
Speaker 1:We always see your dick, the big that is true.
Speaker 3:Look who's talking. What do you mean? What do you mean?
Speaker 5:Everybody's always like well, race of stuff. Here's my penis. Marky, I'll show your penis.
Speaker 1:Oh my God, it's so smelly. I can see the lines coming off of it.
Speaker 3:I can see the stink lines Huh, that's tough, that's tough.
Speaker 1:So the boldly 100 or 1000.
Speaker 3:Yeah, he was 1000.
Speaker 2:I said 100 K.
Speaker 1:It's a little bit further up in the achievement list.
Speaker 4:Hold on, oh sure.
Speaker 1:Merck. Wait, hang on, wait. Who did this get tweeted on ADHD after dark, Mercky and Coco will be reading a 1000 page novel about it's on the Internet. Now you gotta do it gay romance on the podcast tonight. We all right. Well, where's this novel at? I'll read shit.
Speaker 5:Yeah, I don't see anything. We were going to get this far.
Speaker 2:Oh, it is.
Speaker 5:Miss.
Speaker 2:Hey, let me, let me find that Tick tock. I'm going to find that exact one and we're going to have them read it. Beautiful, just a second, I'll find it.
Speaker 1:We're waiting.
Speaker 2:Hey, give me a second.
Speaker 5:I'm looking through the video and rest this shit, and what's your price? Jesus Rosh is Jesus Christ.
Speaker 4:Coco may or may not have Make it through of your mother.
Speaker 1:You tweeted that on gameboat. Yes, I did.
Speaker 5:No, our, our, on Internet socials guided.
Speaker 1:Yeah which is to both the bear Right, but he doesn't have access to gameboat, does he?
Speaker 5:It's just he's always had access to gameboat.
Speaker 1:He's the guy is a guy in a chair. I like that. You said to haul that puller beach person and you said I'm fat and I don't like to take my shirt off in public.
Speaker 4:You tell me I miss what happened.
Speaker 1:Oh, he tweeted. He responded to Hall's, hall's tweet, puller beach person and he just goes. I'm fat and don't like to take my shirt off in public.
Speaker 2:You can. All right, found it, Just let you guys know. It is Looks like 15 chapters 16.
Speaker 3:God, oh yeah, Chapter's extra of a fan fiction.
Speaker 2:Dropping in the ADHD after dark chat here. So this is sensation, I believe. Oh, Apple, I did it. Syntax must call sensation Apple Looza, apple Looza. Oh, so this is the sequel to this, but this story is a sequel to sensation.
Speaker 1:Oh my God, the first story is sensation. Where's the sex at which? I don't know, dude, there's, I just know it's in here. 16 chapters, oh God, yeah, I'm not reading this, not allowed.
Speaker 5:You told all the Twitter fans that you were going to do it.
Speaker 2:You told me Well then you find my little pony pornography to read. That's easy.
Speaker 1:This should be.
Speaker 3:Why is it?
Speaker 1:I'll get you an entire fucking link set for fucking board. I'll fucking send it in the goddamn ADHD after dark losers chat. Nobody will open it, but I'll have proof that it's there. Mark, you don't lie to yourself. You'll open it. You'll be the one to open it.
Speaker 3:Oh, I told Ian Zeno that I would read MLP erotic fan fiction.
Speaker 1:Would you read if it was also a comic strip strip and had pictures of the fucking?
Speaker 5:He draws the line he's like I don't know.
Speaker 1:The music is going to do shit. Don't. Don't put this on.
Speaker 2:You know, you know about me.
Speaker 5:You were the one that said on Twitter that you were going to do it, so you got to do it.
Speaker 3:Oh yeah, sure, Fuck it, go ahead, send it Coco.
Speaker 1:I wouldn't fucking send it to go.
Speaker 3:Oh shit, this is the first time that fucking porn is going to be on this computer.
Speaker 1:No no sure. All right, somebody else be entertaining.
Speaker 2:That is not going to be me.
Speaker 5:Miss, it's on you yeah miss.
Speaker 3:What do you got? I can make noises. I make while I fish. Do it.
Speaker 5:But now.
Speaker 4:That's probably pretty accurate to.
Speaker 3:Yeah, exactly, you know, I stopped the gas station.
Speaker 1:This is. This is the first fucking image I found. Here you go, I am almost oh click. Don't click.
Speaker 2:Oh fuck.
Speaker 5:Oh yeah, I don't know, I don't know. Oh, two unicorns to making out.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, and station.
Speaker 2:Oh, I don't know, they don't have horns. What just has a gigantic dick. So it's.
Speaker 5:Do they? Am I on the same link as you guys Did you?
Speaker 3:shoot a MLP. Oh my God, I fucking ate it. Is there a dick somewhere that I'm missing.
Speaker 1:I'm. It's in the ADHD after dark chat.
Speaker 5:Yeah, I just click. Oh wait, oh wait, oh, no, yeah.
Speaker 2:That's what we're talking about.
Speaker 5:Yeah, there it is. That is it All righty?
Speaker 2:No, it makes for you to run my pet, don't fucking keep me waiting a second longer. Let her know your place as my slave. Ok, bitch, I am. This is coming from the person who's about to be fucked by the food.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I'm going to fucking throw up.
Speaker 2:So he says outwardly and on the right it's just a bunch of I'm going to come. My ass is yours.
Speaker 1:Oh yeah, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh oh.
Speaker 4:Look, it was very easy. I just went to a site and typed in.
Speaker 1:I went to a site type for the word comic and I clicked the first one that was fucking erotic, which was the first fucking image.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I was going to say I'd imagine it's the first image.
Speaker 1:If I can, it's full of degenerate fucking people. Yeah, like you. Yeah, I wonder how many total fucking explicit images are on the site. Let's find out.
Speaker 3:Let's find out.
Speaker 1:Let's not Four hundred and thirty seven thousand six hundred and eight oh my. Explicit images. Yeah, explicit, and that includes web ends and animations. Suggestive Is 180,692, which is, you know, essentially soft core.
Speaker 5:OK, it's a goddamn good thing you found gas.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and the question was one hundred, and sixteen thousand seven hundred and thirty two, which is also basically soft core point how? Many safe images do they have? Two million fifty nine thousand eight hundred and eleven. So at least there's a ratio of safe to unsafe.
Speaker 2:OK.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so I've devolved the podcast of 14 minutes into it. What do we do now? Smash your pass. What happens?
Speaker 3:You got to read fucking goddamn MLP Fan pick. Hmm.
Speaker 1:Did you see, that Borderlands the movies coming out next year.
Speaker 2:Actually, I just I think they put it to that day, hoping that the writer strike and the actor strike will be over.
Speaker 5:I don't feel like it will.
Speaker 2:Yeah, but it most likely will. But a lot of things are being delayed because of those strikes by a long time.
Speaker 1:Wonder who's going to buckle first. I'm very curious at this point, like it's almost like that taking at this point, bet you there's a pool in Vegas for it.
Speaker 4:People who are buckle first will be the, the, the companies, because what they're asking for is insane. They basically want, if you have like, say you're an extra right.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 4:Once you like are an extra. They want to have the full reuse of your likeness by their AI, so that they never have to get extras again.
Speaker 1:Oh, that's like an yeah Cool.
Speaker 2:Trying to be, as cheap as humanly possible.
Speaker 4:Yeah, and they're trying to try and get full use out of somebody's like this without, like you know, paying somebody. I'm like paying them once and then the rest of the life. Yeah, now you just the rest of the life, yeah, until the company's fucking gone yeah. So, yeah, this isn't going to go anyway, Go away anytime soon.
Speaker 2:Now it's going to be a huge fight.
Speaker 1:Thank God for YouTube content. Now I haven't been surviving on actual fucking produced content in a while.
Speaker 5:Yeah, I've got YouTube videos all the time. Before I could have been.
Speaker 4:In fact I was just. I was just reading something the other day about Jet Lee how he didn't go into the matrix. I think it was reloaded or whatever it was, because they wanted to be able to Kind of clone his martial arts moves without paying them for it.
Speaker 1:That's good.
Speaker 5:That's good Yep.
Speaker 1:Jesus Christ speaking of MLP. Go look at opera GX's fucking Twitter post from fucking seven hours ago.
Speaker 2:Oh Jesus, okay, so let's open it up opera for you, for those of you in oh no, it's the Mordecai me. And they teamed up with voice mod yeah, here I'll put this.
Speaker 1:I'm gonna put this a bunch of times in this chat so we can get the porn out of here.
Speaker 4:So where's this chat?
Speaker 1:I'm gonna send. I'm gonna send it to you, miss. Unless you know what, fuck it, I'll just put you in the ADHD after dark chat.
Speaker 2:Bring him in here. He's in here enough. I'm not putting him on the banner, though, until he's in the least three episodes banner and pays. Untwitch our banner on goodness Twitter Twitter.
Speaker 4:It's really funny, as it says you already have a group of $32.
Speaker 1:I Added you to the group and it's like you already have a group with this people. You want to create a new one? Yes, it's, it's a completely different subject. Yeah, oh my god, I can't believe that. They fucking. They did that dude opera. Gx's Twitter team fucking on par. They're fucking. Oh my god, that's hilarious. I Guess, because we talked about it, I should retweet it on the ADHD after dark Twitter account.
Speaker 4:Do it.
Speaker 1:I'm doing it right now. Well, yeah, fucking voice mod Responded can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars? Opera GX responded wrong meteorite and it's just a fucking giant fucking rock crashing into the earth and blowing it up. My god, look at. Somebody asked are you boy? Are you boy, friends? And opera GX goes. It's pretty obvious, right, oh?
Speaker 2:Yeah, of course they're dating Jesus Christ.
Speaker 1:Can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky like shooting stars? I don't even know why that views, but I don't even know why that became a new user wish right now oh. Did it and then like for no fucking reason it took off.
Speaker 5:Side note Haley Williams could come into my house and shit on my floor and I would still worship her.
Speaker 1:What is your bed? Huh, what does she shit on your bed?
Speaker 5:100%.
Speaker 3:On you.
Speaker 5:I'd be like e green corn, huh, Ah bro, she shit on him.
Speaker 1:That means he's very close to other parts. Yeah, I Think he'd take it as a win.
Speaker 5:I'd take it as a right.
Speaker 3:It's an absolute win. That's fair. That's a fair stay right.
Speaker 1:Did he do, do, do, do, do. Why am I such a nerd? I'm nerding out over the fucking city, skylines, fucking blog post as we all probably have undiagnosed autism. Undiagnosed. I'm pretty sure. I'm pretty sure they're like fucking little one-time Mentioned to me. He was like you just got that fucking autistic smart.
Speaker 1:You just fucking see something and understand it immediately and I was like you know I'm not gonna disagree with you, but I don't like that. You called it that autistic. You didn't have to say it like that. He's like, but is true. And I was like, fuck you.
Speaker 2:You. You're not my real dad.
Speaker 1:Dude, the last episode of my city skyline started off with a giant forest fire and then it ended with me.
Speaker 3:I'm getting it.
Speaker 1:Did you see the end where I was just like, oh, oh, uh-oh, and it's me zooming in on my population going down and then the game Physically starts lagging and I'm like what the fuck's happening? It's because the game ticked out in one fucking frame it despawned 5,000 people worth of houses and the game was just like, and I was like, yeah, I was dying.
Speaker 3:The first three minutes you're just like oh no, okay, I'm gonna, I'm gonna reload from like this point. Oh fuck, I still can't stop it. Oh my god.
Speaker 1:And then I'm like, let me put some fire utilities down and it's just. And then it just continues on with me building and the fire is just fucking Going on around the background.
Speaker 3:Well, let's move over here, away from the fire, so you guys can't see it and um, we could put this here. Yeah, this is good.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's like fucking Bob Ross, put a, put a happy little park here, put some houses here, but uh.
Speaker 2:I'll make up for it. I'll more than make up for it.
Speaker 1:And then I fucking then it goes to the fast. Oh you get. Your base is getting a text. You know he's got the shotgun, he's got the dude stick, bro, that dude's fucking running, he's naked.
Speaker 5:He's like a Titan.
Speaker 1:I got it For anybody who's our audio listeners. We're gonna get distracted by this. What do you?
Speaker 2:mean, who's our audio listeners? Do we have fucking visual listeners us?
Speaker 1:right now If we ever made this a video, because I still have all the videos, though I don't think we could upload some of them.
Speaker 2:I don't think we could upload them unless they were to like porn hub, because even kick wouldn't accept this.
Speaker 5:I mean maybe we should upload them the porn hub, like, let's be real about it, look at them cakes though.
Speaker 1:Oh, big old fucking cakes.
Speaker 5:Let's go.
Speaker 1:Go take a look at that real quick.
Speaker 5:Yeah.
Speaker 2:All right, that's gonna be a good quality of that, but that that we're after yeah.
Speaker 1:Oh my god, I posted a safer one to Twitter.
Speaker 4:Hmm. It's murky run first money? Yeah, does.
Speaker 1:Maybe that is murky. They just modeled his ass in the game.
Speaker 5:Oh, you knocked over my goddamn soup.
Speaker 4:Actually, it was that chick that the. She sat there and waited and then, as soon as the the pot was done boiling, she gets up and walks right through it, kills the fire and knocks it over. God damn it.
Speaker 5:Virginia.
Speaker 2:So San Diego Comic-Con's happening right now is it.
Speaker 1:Yeah, oh yeah, anything, anything exciting come out of it.
Speaker 2:Well, apparently Sometimes people will open restaurants at cons and they're like little pop-up shops.
Speaker 1:We talking about the one that got sued by fucking take two.
Speaker 2:Yeah Well, they didn't get sued, they got a cease and desist.
Speaker 1:That's the same thing is sued for for fucking mocking, for fucking Opening a restaurant that was the clucking bell From GTA 5, even though it has.
Speaker 2:I thought I was saying Andreas. San Andreas, but it has like not any Significance to the brand of yeah, they just named it after it, but then they got a cease and desist, so they're renaming it tomorrow to don't cluck and tell.
Speaker 5:Hell yeah. Yeah, they got a season they got a.
Speaker 1:They got a cease and desist for fucking a restaurant, a video game that, let's be real, could have been named anything and they're saying it's infringing on their IP.
Speaker 4:I'm sure.
Speaker 1:That's essentially the same thing as somebody go into a con talking about Mario and then fucking getting a cease and desist from Nintendo. Nintendo would do it. Oh yeah, 100% talking about not making a talk like physically a person that Nintendo hates. Just said the word Mario.
Speaker 5:Like what does an invoice actor for Mario? He said that, like Nintendo tells him, like he's not supposed to do any of his voices like Mario Voices at all, yeah, and he's like yeah, get back.
Speaker 2:Straight up does not care what are they gonna do oh?
Speaker 1:my god, yeah, they don't own his voice.
Speaker 5:What the hell? A bunch of goddamn babies, that's unfortunate for you.
Speaker 1:Well, I can't say. I don't know if we can say what you're killing on the podcast. Is that gonna get us canceled? That wouldn't call those babies, those are just balls of meat.
Speaker 2:So I just came across a bunch of cosplayers who are Cosplaying as the generation One or season one and season two. Uh, buddy, more from Power Rangers. Yeah, and almost in like center frame is a white ranger. The first thing I looked at Was like his chest piece and.
Speaker 1:I was like okay, and then I looked down, I was like dick Zeno has this guy beats.
Speaker 2:Look at this, zeno Was it an any has the chat destroyed in the bulge department.
Speaker 1:He's so proud to. Yeah, I have a tiny dick. Yeah, oh, so we, we're going to Gen Con soon.
Speaker 2:Yeah, we are going to Gen Con Not next week but the week after, correct? We're gonna fuck, and I Figured, this weekend I was just gonna buy myself some of the event tickets for Power Rangers stuff.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I don't know what I'm gonna because renegade games are gonna be there.
Speaker 2:Who are doing the Power Rangers tabletop game that Zeno and I have been playing over on joysticks?
Speaker 1:Go check it out. I don't know what's happening so I can't talk about it. Give him a spoiler of where you're at. This is gonna release after your episode is anyway right, we're Power Rangers.
Speaker 5:Well, I mean.
Speaker 2:Session zero session one session two already out, yeah, so what happened?
Speaker 1:in session two like, which is the big thing that happened there.
Speaker 5:I think in session two we got our I don't really know they're really saying anything without spoiling session one or you know Well, session one, assume people listen to session.
Speaker 1:All right, fucking session zero. What happened?
Speaker 2:session zero is just where they can, yeah, just session ones where it really starts happening correct the story? I don't know anything about Power Rangers, so I can't ask any of you guys.
Speaker 1:I don't know anything about Power Rangers, so I can't ask any fucking questions. Did you kill the bad guys or the bad?
Speaker 5:guys fucking you. The bad guys are doing a lot of fucking.
Speaker 1:Oh, just fucking not, you, just fucking everybody.
Speaker 5:No, they're fucking me. I'm getting fucked a lot. They're very fucking me.
Speaker 2:Session zero miles in Zeno introduced their character. Zeno is our purple ranger, but because the source book that tells you how to make a purple ranger doesn't come out until November, he is on the red ranger spectrum, so he's acting as a red ranger. He's just purple.
Speaker 1:All right. What is? What are the different color rangers mean?
Speaker 2:Zeno, you take this one.
Speaker 5:So the red ranger is generally the leader ranger of the team and then beyond that, there's really no huge relevance with ranger colors other than, like pink's always a girl. Yeah, pink is 90% of the time a girl.
Speaker 2:I think there was there's one season where pink was a guy.
Speaker 5:Yeah, and then the comic books. Pink ranger was a guy on the original 90 morphin team, um, but then there's like the titanium ranger, which is like a six special ranger. Usually the six rangers have like a special color, that um they represent yeah.
Speaker 1:Got it. So red is leader. Every other color doesn't fucking matter. Well, it's kind of weird.
Speaker 2:They kind of do follow a scheme, but sometimes they break it up a little bit.
Speaker 1:Yeah, they do it for a fucking plot, right.
Speaker 2:Essentially, yeah, like pink's always going to be whatever it's a girl whenever it's convenient for the plot, They'll change it right essentially, yeah, like red, black and green are normally going to be your powerhouses. If you look at it, yellow, blue and pink are going to be your quick fighters. That's normally how the show kind of runs them, but ultimately it's just a group of superheroes on the tv show.
Speaker 1:Uh, in the Hold on, I haven't. And the original power rangers, like the original, like tv series, wasn't at all just like stock footage from like japan or something like that.
Speaker 2:Yeah it was from a super sentai. I think it was zeo rangers is what they're called, or zayo.
Speaker 1:It's very similar to how they actually recorded mxc right, where they just like fucking voiced over everything. Yes.
Speaker 5:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Oh, later seasons, though they did take some props from the people that made super sentai, because almost all the super sentais were like filmed years ago or previous seasons, so that way power rangers could like record Whatever previous season had already happened and make it our current season.
Speaker 1:I'm gonna be honest power rangers was almost a completely different thing. You were very close to a different word there for super sentai.
Speaker 5:Yeah, super senpai super hentai.
Speaker 1:Could you imagine? Power rangers was based on a show called super hentai.
Speaker 5:That's probably important.
Speaker 2:I'm sure.
Speaker 2:I'm sure if there's probably adults super sentai, but uh yes, that's what's rule 34 is yeah, yes, yeah, if it exists, they respond of it but uh, going back session one, we kind of like Show the characters as just normal, regular people. They kind of get introduced to the big bad evil guy who I'm calling, lord azul. Uh, ios kind of wants to really destroy this big bad evil guy because the big bad evil guy killed his favorite NPC in the story so far. Oh, session two Our power rangers are getting trained by jack landers, who is the red ranger of power rangers spd which is one of my favorite seasons and they learn how to use their morphers and like this hologram training room and that's pretty much where they're at right now.
Speaker 1:Nice.
Speaker 2:Yeah, please go ahead and check out session zero one and two. Give it a listen, put it on into the background, leave a like on youtube, because it's slowly starting to make the rounds on youtube more than it is on spotify and apple and all that stuff. I don't know how to explain it like we're just really not getting the listens audio wise. But come youtube we're seeing a little bit of numbers, not what we used to pull, but That'll just come with consistency.
Speaker 1:Holy fuck, my latest city skyline says 50 views nice.
Speaker 2:Ever since I've been creating shorts for joysticks and started promoting our uh tabletop. Our Session zero actually has 81 views right now very nice, very nice. Yeah, I'm the start of today. I think we're at what? 70, so I got us 11 views. Good sheet.
Speaker 1:That's good.
Speaker 2:Uh, speaking of tabletop, I know murky was talking to me about trying to start up the o inverse again.
Speaker 1:Yeah, we gotta do that. We can do that now.
Speaker 5:Bring uh mizzen.
Speaker 1:He just has to pick an o and wilson character murky's muted, so we can't bring it back.
Speaker 2:Yeah murky's probably getting deep by dussey?
Speaker 3:I hope so no, so I talked to edu. Remember where we are.
Speaker 2:I did. Uh, I remember you guys defeated wheelchairs for the blind.
Speaker 3:Yeah, so I did some homework and I went through and listened. The fucking murky is serious about this. Yeah, because I wanted to make sure, because last time I said where we ended at, you said I was a liar. Oh I did. You said I was wrong and you're fucking in correct.
Speaker 3:Fuck you coco. But where we ended at is we beat the dog shit out of wheelchair blind. I shanked him and in the fucking neck, zeno punched through someone's face and coco ran into a bunch of walls and didn't Fucking kill anybody and got shot up by guns. That sounds right. That makes sense. That's. That's exactly what.
Speaker 1:I think that's a lie.
Speaker 3:Uh, I don't know. I'll bet you your next three page x. Hey.
Speaker 5:Jesus, fuck man. I mean understand your adam and about you being right, but fuck Don't coco that he says We've got special coming. I'm sorry, miss, I know you don't deserve this shit.
Speaker 2:You should not be Racism out of those bands. But I will have to bring up murky, what are you doing right now? I'm disgusted.
Speaker 5:Or coco doesn't know how to act. He's laughing.
Speaker 1:I like it times that's never viewed Murky's a racist. Oh shit. Remember when we found this and we thought it was the funniest thing in the fucking world.
Speaker 5:Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2:And then dilla complained about us.
Speaker 5:Yeah, fuck you dilla. How fucking dare you.
Speaker 2:How fucking dare who dilla.
Speaker 4:Baw.
Speaker 1:We just confused like 17 listeners.
Speaker 5:Confused murky.
Speaker 1:So how? So how we bring the o inverse back. I'm lightning queen, murky was somebody was incorrectly placed in the o inverse, but we said, fucking anyway, murky.
Speaker 3:Yeah, that was me. And then zeno was I'm john from marley and me Not wedding crashers, correct, but that doesn't fucking matter.
Speaker 2:Uh, I'm trying to find that. I'm reading you didn't have a special statue, right, I did yeah I'm trying to find it.
Speaker 3:Even zeno have guns and we loaded up lightning queen with ammo that we found and we are gonna go fuck shit up.
Speaker 2:Ah, here it is apocalypse. Wow, all right. So coco's lightning queen. He gets two plus two On whatever he rolls for his runs. Uh, I guess I'll reset your guys's wow.
Speaker 1:Six every rolled or a d d 12 2d 6, 2d 6 okay. So at d 12.
Speaker 2:Uh, essentially yeah right, but like the lowest you can get is a two yeah, I mean, you still can get fucked with that For this right yes, I was, uh, so the note that I have left for myself is john now has a kid on the way in nine months. Oh yeah, they found out about the owen wilson statue. That cries blood.
Speaker 3:Yeah, and then I went to go driving and ran into wheelchairs for the blind Probably the best chair you had less god to reach you to pick a uh, an owen wilson character.
Speaker 2:Let me Any owen wilson character. Yeah, hold on. They also have some examples. I just need to find where the fuck.
Speaker 1:It's.
Speaker 4:I have one of mine who you're gonna be. Royal bannon.
Speaker 2:I think he actually has a premade thing. Let me see if I can find the royal bandit correct royal bannon.
Speaker 3:Yep, I'm like shinghai.
Speaker 5:Yep, I like it.
Speaker 2:Trying to see what should these folders. I have been here, it is.
Speaker 1:To do, do, do do.
Speaker 2:All right, royal bandit is on here.
Speaker 1:Toss, you already have a premade thing for it. Cool, nice. I forget the sheet too. Where is it at?
Speaker 4:Uh, hold on, Let me share it with you. We should have pink.
Speaker 1:We should have pinned it to the damn group.
Speaker 2:We're stupid. That's why.
Speaker 1:I need to access.
Speaker 2:I don't know if anyone with the link uh editor done, there's a better that's better. Okay, all right, boop, boop. Uh, let's see miss, you're gonna be right. Oh, bannon, you get plus one in ponder and you get Psh plus one in charm.
Speaker 1:I like that murky has plus two in charm and dog and dog, hell yeah.
Speaker 2:All right, now let me get barred up here.
Speaker 1:Oh, this is going to be so dumb. I forgot how stupid the one first was. Very, it was very dumb Like my queen, fuck him.
Speaker 3:OK, mobius and Roy O'Bannon.
Speaker 2:All right. So, miss, just so you understand the mechanics of this game. So you guys are part of the world's traveling. Owen Wilson's are Wow for sure. Wow, wow, wow. So you are going to have and I'll have the skills let's sit here for you guys so you have some remembrance. You have fights, so that's going to be your combat roles. You're going to have spy, which is your ability to sneak around and and gather, like cover information. You're going to have ponder, which is going to be your ability to go like wide eyed and figure out important things. So like, if you guys are stuck, you're not too sure what to do, you can try to roll a ponder and I can, like pinch you into the next thing, or you can even make like connections.
Speaker 1:I still think it's funny that, doing this fucking Owen Wilson verse, I never realized that lightning a queen was voiced by Owen Wilson. Until we did this. I was like, really I didn't know.
Speaker 5:That is fantastic.
Speaker 1:And I was like I guess it makes sense why he goes to Chow Wow. Run is my attack, though, because I'm a car and I do a room over Correct. Charm is having sex Right.
Speaker 2:I like your constitution. I just fucking small constitution.
Speaker 5:Fuck, be right back. My food is here.
Speaker 1:That was some long fucking McDonald's.
Speaker 5:I forgot to order it actually and I ordered about 50 minutes.
Speaker 3:That makes sense. Yeah, it's going to be long this next fucking fish.
Speaker 1:I are you fucking fishing, margie, you fishing.
Speaker 2:No, you pussy A lot of me.
Speaker 1:You fucking push, here we go.
Speaker 2:So you have fight, which is your combat role, spy, which you sneak and gather information, ponder, we kind of go wide eyed, you figure things out, you make connections. You have run, which is fleeing, but for lightning queen we also make that his attack rolls. You have charm, which kind of acts as like your constitution. We're kind of like stomach things, but we also made it so you can like convince people to help you, flirt with them, whatever, yeah, I think somebody, I think I banged two chicks.
Speaker 1:I just took them off and fucking banged them in one episode.
Speaker 4:As a car.
Speaker 3:Yes, yeah, that's how it worked.
Speaker 2:Oh, that's a big fish, oh we're not going to question things, but You'll have your wow, which is, if you fail a role, you're like crap, I really need to succeed this role. You can be like hey, oh, m the Owen master, which is me. I really want to pass this role because I really don't want to mess up right here. Can I use a wow and I can allow it or deny it. So I would make sure you have, I don't know, two physical D6 or, uh, Google, I'm just going to put in two D6 on Google and I'm just going to use that. I rolled a seven, so, uh, if you roll 10 or higher, it's an instant success. So it's basically like rolling Like almost an at 20. If you roll a 12, it's an at 20. Of this seven to nine, it's a success. But there's maybe a complication Six or below is basically a fail.
Speaker 1:So you know what'd you get to drink?
Speaker 4:Oak Nice.
Speaker 1:All right.
Speaker 2:So um we have Lightning McQueen, agent.
Speaker 5:Oh yes, what were our roles again?
Speaker 2:Uh so, uh, I'm just going to say, I'm just going to say, uh, so you're Asian Mobius. Uh, so you know the time traveler from Loki.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you saved my ass. When murky slapped it so hard, it fucking broke my car into pieces.
Speaker 5:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Who died?
Speaker 3:from my hand.
Speaker 1:I died from murky slap and fucking. Zeno had to go back in time and tell murky not to slap me.
Speaker 5:Yeah.
Speaker 1:And then we continued from the new timeline and the old timeline disappeared.
Speaker 5:Yeah, correct.
Speaker 1:Which is basically the whole fucking episode. If I remember, we just undid it all because we played for like 10 minutes.
Speaker 3:I got you just the restroom right back.
Speaker 5:No, that was the episode that you drove off with murky's bride.
Speaker 1:No, that was. That was the episode when I came back. I came back and murky fucking destroyed me.
Speaker 5:Hmm.
Speaker 1:And then we undid that and then I guess we continued on for a little bit and I forgot about that part. Cdhd in me.
Speaker 5:What are our dice rolls 2d6 2d6.
Speaker 1:Yep, merky's going to go shit, he can't take us with him. I wanted to hear All right.
Speaker 2:I'm giving Bard a prompt to get us started here. Hell yeah, actually, all right. Lightning McQueen, a gemobius, and John are in a post apocalyptic world trying to find the true Owen Wilson of that world. They heard rumors about an Owen Wilson statue that was bleeding from the eyes and they believed that the statue might hold the key to finding that world's Owen Wilson. They traveled to the wheelchairs for the blind stronghold, a rumored hideout, for a possible clue to finding Owen Wilson. When they arrived, they were met with hostilities of people in mechanical wheelchairs fighting them. However, they have just walked into a building to discover Roy O'Bannon, the leader of wheelchairs.
Speaker 5:Do the thing, go do the thing.
Speaker 1:Was that the wrong one? No, that was the one it's a cannon event.
Speaker 5:Okay.
Speaker 2:We're going to wait for Merky.
Speaker 1:He's going to have no idea. Nobody tell Merky what happened.
Speaker 4:It'll be like, oh fuck, what's going on.
Speaker 2:Oh, you just have to play by ear.
Speaker 1:Oh my God, that was. Would you get to eat there Is?
Speaker 2:it a burger or chicken sandwich.
Speaker 4:Big double or core Is a quarter pounder quarter pounder.
Speaker 2:I like the quarter pounder. I know it's not good for me, but you know so now, most of McDonald's isn't good for you. No, nothing for McDonald's is good for you.
Speaker 5:I get the conversion.
Speaker 1:I think you can get away with the apple slices being good. Nobody gets them.
Speaker 2:I'm sure they probably have some weird pesticide on them, probably yeah.
Speaker 5:I'm pretty sure I remember reading that they had to put the apple slices in their happy meal or to be healthy enough to advertise to kids, and even then the meal itself is still not all that healthy, but the apples will bring it down to be in line with guidelines.
Speaker 1:But you can still order with fries, right? I don't know what if this change happened.
Speaker 5:Maybe they had to offer like a healthier option or something like that. I remember it being a big deal when they added the apple slices.
Speaker 1:Makes sense.
Speaker 5:It wasn't because they wanted to, it's because they had to Did.
Speaker 1:Americans say he's going to go poop or pee.
Speaker 5:Off. He's probably peeing out of his ass. He fell in.
Speaker 1:Makes sense His bad terms like fucking three steps away from his goddamn Probably what happened was he started to shit and his ass like impressed a little bit. And then back up out of his throat.
Speaker 5:No. And then, like when his ass went back to normal size, he got stuck in the fucking bowl.
Speaker 1:Oh yeah, Well, that's what I'm thinking. Time to call 911 fire rescue. They can't do anything for him? Well, get a crowbar to break the fucking toilet.
Speaker 5:They have to get the jaws of fucking life in there, not really Just crack the toilet.
Speaker 1:Oh my God he.
Speaker 5:Okay, you know what we were talking about.
Speaker 1:What were we talking about, murky?
Speaker 3:Yeah, tell us yeah tell us I definitely missed. Well, you're like, oh guys, don't tell him. I'm like fuck, that's what I get for watching tech talks while I pull.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, absolutely.
Speaker 1:All right. So how are we going to fucking roll with this All?
Speaker 2:right. So setting the scene, you guys have just entered in the stronghold of wheelchairs for the blind. As you're roaming through, you notice one building that seems to be particularly armed to the tee. You guys enter in because these doors are wide enough, for whatever reason, for a car to come in as well. I was going to.
Speaker 1:I mean, it's a poke, poke, poke post apocalyptic world. Jesus Christ.
Speaker 5:Are you okay? You're having a stroke or like what happened there.
Speaker 1:That's the, that's the autism hitting. Fuck you, murky.
Speaker 2:So as you three roll in, you see on a chair made of leftover wheelchair parts into a thrown, and sitting on it is Roy O Bannon, the leader of wheelchairs for the blind. Wow, wow, we know. Wow, fucking thing. All right, murky.
Speaker 1:You're the one that wanted to do this. What do we do? I'm just a car.
Speaker 3:Um, and I still on the car.
Speaker 2:Here you go. Yeah, you guys were walking next to Lightning McQueen as you strolled into this place to investigate the boys.
Speaker 5:I'm thinking they're keeping him held captive here against his will, I think he need. Lightning McQueen to run up there, grab his ass real quick.
Speaker 3:I was thinking more. I'm going to use my gun and I'm just going to shoot him right in the head.
Speaker 1:You're gonna kill this.
Speaker 3:I mean, if he's sitting on a throne of wheelchairs, it can't be good right yeah, but we don't know that.
Speaker 5:Okay, he's a fellow, oh it fuck.
Speaker 2:Oh, that's right. You agent Mobius and, uh, john, both got guns and a bunch of ammo.
Speaker 5:He's obviously a variant, so you know we can just talk to him or throw him in the fucking trunk either way.
Speaker 1:Well, I'm gonna need somebody to go with me to throw him in the truck well, hold on, I'm gonna help you okay, I'm going first.
Speaker 3:Can I try and charm him to get into like I don't?
Speaker 1:think you were going. I don't think. Okay, you can try to try to charm me try to charm him to get inside of me, I guess what's your wow there, murky?
Speaker 2:okay, okay, before you guys even go too far, I'm going to focus on miss here for a second miss. You see a car with a mouth and eyes roll into your place, two people that shockingly look a lot like you, including the car the car resembles you. Yeah, the car looks like you somehow you hear these guys arguing what they're going to do to you, because they just rolled in and see you immediately.
Speaker 1:This is why the soundboard was funny.
Speaker 2:I remember now I also see that the two people that look shockingly like you have guns that they have taken from your wheelchairs, from your people that were defending.
Speaker 3:Well, he doesn't know they just so happen to be the same guns. You know we could have found those. We could have found those anywhere. We could have found them at the fucking convenience store. We won't just see the shank in my belt loop of my fucking assless chaps Christ you're John from Marley and me now right.
Speaker 2:Well, he's a mix of wedding crashers and Marley at the same timeline where's Doug at, he's inside the dog now don't we got a dog?
Speaker 5:he's come with us so very confused what's happening?
Speaker 2:we're focusing on the band aid okay yeah, you three are arguing right now, royal band and sitting on a throne just kind of listening. Roy, what would you do in this instance?
Speaker 5:listen, my fellow and I think we just kick the fucking narrator here. We just write our own story.
Speaker 4:I don't know how much I had the drink. Wow, wow that.
Speaker 3:I don't know about that idea, guys. You know it just. There's so many wow's going on. We kind of need someone to keep track all the wowing mmm fucking ease already regretting. Wow, john, here wow, that was deep. Wow, moebius, you're, you're, you're a good looking guy. I'd fuck you wow.
Speaker 5:You know what, john? Every time I look at you, I just think wow wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, freaked up, wow wow, nice wow wow, wow, that's good, wow there all right, mr narrator, do what you do
Speaker 2:oh, I'm sorry, I thought you didn't want me here. Oh, we need you to wow us. Well, I'm waiting to see what royal band and dust cuz I'm allowing it to be his turn right now.
Speaker 4:Yeah yeah wow, I don't even know what kind of work is why I have access to you are in the most high tech wheelchair that will become battle armor for you.
Speaker 2:Well cuz, that's what happened to Zeno in the last session.
Speaker 3:Don't think I forgot wow, wow, oh, you're talking about yeah should let me fucking shoot him movie still can no, it's his turn. Now y'all let me know, I mean, you're gonna be his turn because you, we're gonna shoot him.
Speaker 5:I think this is your fault.
Speaker 4:That's why I really, I guess they're coming in with such aggression towards me.
Speaker 2:I turn into my battle bot so I'm going to need everybody to roll initiative for me. Roll 2d6 everybody nine.
Speaker 5:I got five five all right.
Speaker 2:So I heard a nine from Coco, I heard a five from is, a five from murky and one from Zeno seven and they said all right. So at the top of the list we have lightning McQueen than Mobius, and right now we got a tie with John and Roy. I'm gonna need you to roll me some new initiative to see who goes third seven.
Speaker 4:Five again. I don't know how much I like Google.
Speaker 2:All right, we're going to do is we're going to make. All three of us get together before this, hell yeah. So, lightning McQueen, you now see that royal band and is in the middle of transforming his wheelchair into the battle armor you saw earlier.
Speaker 1:I'm turned on.
Speaker 5:I'm straight up break up. I'm fucking.
Speaker 1:I'm backfiring like a motherfucker. I'm stunned I'm not doing anything this turn. Oh my god.
Speaker 3:I'm such a raging boner I can't move.
Speaker 1:And I placed my car in defense mode and I turned.
Speaker 3:You just roll up your windows, wow.
Speaker 4:Lock the door, all right.
Speaker 2:So next up in the order is Mobius.
Speaker 5:I'll say Fuck.
Speaker 1:I'm sorry.
Speaker 5:Lightning McQueen is not going to be any help.
Speaker 3:Watching you eat french fries no like with a, just give them a french fry.
Speaker 5:He doesn't like him.
Speaker 2:I was probably interested in them, but he's like I can tell this is not me food.
Speaker 5:What he doesn't like, like any human food at all. Robby, all right Um.
Speaker 3:Well, big.
Speaker 5:Can I inspect the device for any weak points? Well, do I know of any weak points, since I was in that suit prior. Wow, wow.
Speaker 2:Because you were in it prior. You do know that the back of a suit does have a little bit of a weak spot.
Speaker 5:Is there a power button?
Speaker 1:Yeah, essentially it's the status to my character of Horty on the sheet.
Speaker 5:I'm going to try to run up behind it and push the power button All right, so I'm going to need you to make me a run check, okay. That's just 2D6, right, 2d6.
Speaker 4:Six.
Speaker 2:That's a fail, my dude. So you get the smart idea that you're just going to start just running for it and I'm just going to say Royal Band, and it sees that and he just kicks a random wheel that's near him to trip you and you fall flat on your face. Sweet, do it.
Speaker 3:Next in the lineup is so as John stands there and sees Mobius fall flat on his fucking face on what I'm guessing is wheelchair made steps, I'm going to keep my gun at like a kind of a hip fire stance, but I'm going to try talking to Royal Bannon.
Speaker 1:So one person's horny Try to, one person attacked and one person's going to try to fucking charm him.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I'm going to try and bring down the animosity.
Speaker 2:All right, roll me a charm. You get plus two on your roll.
Speaker 3:Beautiful. I rolled a six Plus two would be eight.
Speaker 2:That would be an eight. Okay, so what do you?
Speaker 3:want to say I'm going to tell Roy hey man, look at us and look at you. You know we could be brothers, we could be long lost, split up at birth, and we obviously need to come together, because we know of this bleeding eye statue that also looks just like us and you know, I think fate has brought us together to become one powerful unit, the most powerful unit in this post apocalyptic world. The only way we can save it is if you join us.
Speaker 2:So now you are successful in the fact that Royal Bannon does understand what you're saying, but because you are at an eighth or some complications and the complication is you still understand that you guys are talking about shooting him in the face.
Speaker 4:Wow, wow.
Speaker 3:Do you need like another charm? Check for me. No, you're fucked. That's Canada the turn is over.
Speaker 2:It is Royal Bannon Roy. It is your turn. What would you like to do?
Speaker 4:Okay, so have I finished getting into my suit.
Speaker 2:You are fully in your suit at this point.
Speaker 4:Yes, Okay, I guess my first order of business is to try to figure out what the fuck is going on.
Speaker 2:All right, Then roll me a ponder, you get plus one.
Speaker 4:Oh boy Six.
Speaker 2:Six, so seven. So while you go wide-eyed and you start to figure out what's happening within your surroundings, you truly don't understand why the car sounds like you. You're starting to put together that the other two humanoids do really look like you. What if they really are your long-lost brother? And what if they are your clones? What if you're their clone? You start to ponder to yourself All right, it goes right back up to the initiative of lightning McQueen, who status is? He's horny.
Speaker 1:Status, ailment, status, ailment of horny. What do I get for being horny?
Speaker 4:Oh, my god minus one do a chop minus one Speed because it's fucking going through the pavement right now.
Speaker 2:I Will make your character is horny. They are minus one on all stats.
Speaker 1:Okay, I'm gonna try to fucking run up to Xeno and pick him up, because he fucking I say at least drive up. Yeah, drive up, I'm gonna drive up to you know her yeah.
Speaker 2:All right, roll me a run. You have a plus one on instead of a plus two, because you're horny.
Speaker 1:I killed. You know, I rolled a five.
Speaker 2:Oh, what would be a six?
Speaker 1:Oh no, I impaled Xena with my huge car, boner.
Speaker 3:Obviously you're exhaust. Instead of coming straight out, the back is just pointed right into the fucking crowd.
Speaker 2:So you drive up and you're trying to help out your friend, but you accidentally run over his big toe. Oh Making mobius. Take one point of damage now he needs a bridge.
Speaker 1:Now you need a wheelchair.
Speaker 2:Yeah, all right, mobius is now your turn. He just had your big toe run over, like you, so walk. It's just gonna hurt like a bitch.
Speaker 5:I'm gonna suggest to roi here we play the drinking game and him and jackie played in the tub. You know we got playing a booze in the back trunk of lightning McQueen. We can you all be gentlemen about this?
Speaker 2:All right, I'll let you to roll me a charm.
Speaker 1:Okay, do we have booze in the back of my car? Yeah, we totally got.
Speaker 3:Yeah, it's from like the very first time we do.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you have a ton of booze too, I
Speaker 3:got my ass, those chaps.
Speaker 5:I got a seven.
Speaker 2:All right, so you're able to Tell roi this. Roi is able to understand that you have a lot of boobs, but the thing that you don't understand right now is Royo Bannon's already drunk at this point. He's.
Speaker 3:That's the negative. Well, I mean, if he sees booze.
Speaker 2:All right, john, it is your turn.
Speaker 3:Um, well being that I'm a dog owning wedding, crashing drunk. Um, I'm gonna Get lightning McQueen to open up truck and I'm just gonna start taking shots out of the different liquor bottles.
Speaker 2:Oh, that hurts. Oh, ciao All right, so that. So roll me a charm, because that's what it falls under.
Speaker 1:You're gonna have to charm me to open up the trunk because I'm so horny.
Speaker 2:Oh, his constitution, his constitution for taking the drinks, is under charm Okay.
Speaker 3:Nice, so I still get plus two correct.
Speaker 2:Yeah, what you're all beautiful.
Speaker 3:I'm rolling right now. I actually rolled a 12, so I don't fucking need it. A bunch of this moves right now. Roy, you're really missing out. Man, I'm gonna get as drunk as roi. I'm gonna get as drunk as roi within five minutes and then when I throw up, I want to throw up on Mobius and his broken toe. Wow, wow, yeah, yeah. When I get, as soon as I get done throwing up and like I'm sweating in my eyes or bloodshot, and I just am sweating and look like I'm gonna pass out, I look.
Speaker 2:Mobius in the eyes. So Roll me a charm again for your constitution to see if you throw up or not. If you fail, you throw up, but if you succeed, uh, you do not throw up, but if you're in that difficulty you just kind of spit up some acid reflex.
Speaker 3:Yeah, let's see what we get. I rolled a nine plus two 11.
Speaker 5:You know, why are you such an?
Speaker 1:alcoholic. I even.
Speaker 2:I don't throw up, dude you try to force yourself to vomit, but the most you let up is a burp.
Speaker 3:He actually shits his pants when I burp and I fart.
Speaker 2:Yes.
Speaker 1:All right, so he almost slipped out.
Speaker 2:We're gonna Change gears over to royal band and roi. You are currently Drunk. I'm also going to put John under the status of drunk.
Speaker 1:So we're horny, no status and drunk.
Speaker 2:Uh, drunk, I'm gonna say you have to roll your d6 twice and take the lowest roll. Oh okay, All right. So royal band and you just got challenged to a shot taking contest.
Speaker 1:Was that? What the fuck did you just drink a can. Nice, beautiful.
Speaker 2:So now, challenge to a contest. My dude, you're currently drunk. Do you accept the challenge? Of course, all righty. So we're gonna say you stroll up next to that lightning McQueen. You grabbed the shot glass that was poured by John. Yeah, yeah, lightning queens gushing because he's very horny. I'm going to need you to roll me a charm. Remember, you have to roll twice and give me the lowest. I think I'm leaking washers to see if you're able to keep up with John or not uh, both of them are four.
Speaker 2:Both of them were four, so you take one more shot and immediately bomb it all over mobius. I am going to say that you guys have defeated Roy.
Speaker 1:He's havin, he's having a drug.
Speaker 3:He is hammer drunk. But you guys are able to pick this guy up. He can't drive anywhere.
Speaker 5:We shouldn't let him drive. He can't drive anywhere, that's true. Throw him in the back seat.
Speaker 1:Dog will take care of him.
Speaker 3:I just had said what still in his fucking wheelchair?
Speaker 2:So you're still in his wheelchair.
Speaker 5:I'm gonna hit the power button on it strap him to the roof.
Speaker 1:Bro, I don't have a suspension. I'm gonna be digging into the ground. I'll just just fine, I'll get out of my wheelchair.
Speaker 3:I'm gonna throw the machine's gonna drop you, your exhaust is gonna literally keep.
Speaker 1:We just go, even though it's canon that my trunk is like dr who's pockets. It's never anything.
Speaker 2:So we're going to say, because you're part of the wow initiative, uh, that's a fucking pocket dimension the world's traveling. Owen Wilson that Mobius is in charge of the uh, the device that allows you to travel through time, but you have Bottomless trunk space basically, I have murky's ass got it. Yeah, but you know what that we that means. If John is also part of the wow, did they just give him a dog?
Speaker 1:Is that part of this? They just gave him a dog.
Speaker 3:So far my dog, anything that you would have us roll on, the dog has not had to roll on, such as like a seatbelt check and whether or not it died because because we're not gonna kill a fucking dog. Exactly, I'm fucking in, so say we, you know we're here and I just want marley to fucking murder.
Speaker 1:Uh, royal band and like he's gonna make you roll and then, if the dog fails, you're gonna get punished.
Speaker 5:And you're gonna get tore up by the dog instead.
Speaker 4:It hurt itself in confusion.
Speaker 3:Okay, I could take a few of confusion, can you?
Speaker 1:Uh-oh, I did, I just.
Speaker 2:So, anyways, okay, so you were able to somehow Get ahold of broi and put him inside lightening queen, which turns lightening queen Somehow even more hornier that broi is inside of him.
Speaker 3:Oh yeah horny. I'm gonna go with the dog.
Speaker 5:Minus two to all rolls Fucking it goes all the way up to xxx horny.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 5:Oh, I'm trying here we're right back. I'm gonna grab the ice cream you grab that ice cream.
Speaker 3:You got ice cream too, Dude look at those short ice cream. Legs yeah, look at those white ass legs. He's got tannin.
Speaker 1:I know he doesn't. The last time he tried to do something outside, he turned into a fucking Red brick.
Speaker 3:That is true, he absolutely went. He went kayaking with me.
Speaker 1:Yeah, because he didn't wear sunscreen like an idiot.
Speaker 3:No, he did not wear sunscreen. Xena, did you burn real good from?
Speaker 2:kayak.
Speaker 1:Yeah, he burned, really good Are you right, how was?
Speaker 3:your sunburn, xena, what? How was your sunburn?
Speaker 2:It's still you can.
Speaker 1:You can still see it in the camera red.
Speaker 5:It's thursday, check this out Is the other side.
Speaker 3:White is white as fuck.
Speaker 2:Inside of my legs red as fuck.
Speaker 3:Yeah, you got to rotate your legs, man, yeah.
Speaker 5:I didn't realize that was just a fucking good old
Speaker 1:time canoeing. He was like a rotisserie chicken that didn't spin.
Speaker 3:Yeah, for real Also are bad because xenos for the first time kayak and we make him go over a bunch of like down blogs and shit, like shit. You got to run at like you start back really far and Just paddling hard as fucked, like just cruise right over. I'm like, see, no, go any, just start paddling like a motherfucker. I'm like, yeah, that'll get you there Back to bottomless trunks and fat asses.
Speaker 1:You lick that.
Speaker 2:Oh.
Speaker 1:Oh.
Speaker 3:Oh yeah, it looks like somebody just came in your room, oh my god.
Speaker 1:Oh, he's licking it. Man, we're gonna have to make this like a short. Somehow I don't have the timer all around like the bottom corners and just like tap it on your nose. You're gonna make them look like a lifeguard. Hey, you're such a child To the twitter.
Speaker 3:To the twitter, to the walls it should be as funny as it is.
Speaker 1:Don't worry everybody.
Speaker 3:You said lifeguard and all I can think about is like the all white, like nose from like half the bridge Down fucking, fucking Larry the lobster.
Speaker 1:Yeah, exactly, you know, if Zeno stood outside any longer, he would look like Larry the lobster, yeah.
Speaker 5:It was a good time and uh, miss was like, hey, I should be careful and wear some sunscreen stuff, because you know no people that have gotten fucked up by the sun during kayaking. And I was like, ah, it'll be fine.
Speaker 1:And then you got fucked up.
Speaker 5:And I got fucked up.
Speaker 2:Then he got fucked up?
Speaker 3:Sure did. Is that what happened to your eye? So it's just super hardcore sunbaugh.
Speaker 5:Mm-hmm.
Speaker 1:The cat attack your eye.
Speaker 5:No, I just got like dry skin right there, or something.
Speaker 1:Oh, got it no.
Speaker 5:Healed it off earlier like a man All right.
Speaker 1:So where are we going to now?
Speaker 3:We got to some hard.
Speaker 2:I'm just waiting on till their ADHD is over before I continue.
Speaker 5:It's never over. He's gonna talk over us.
Speaker 2:All right. So now that you guys are in royal band in place, everybody but Roy, as he's currently kind of sobering up in the back seat needs to roll me a spy.
Speaker 3:Check, mobius you get plus one 12 five. Seven three.
Speaker 1:All right. So I fucking turned my high beams on and see the world.
Speaker 3:I'm hammered and kind of focused.
Speaker 2:So Lighting McQueen Turns on his high beams magically, even though he's a race car, because he's part of the wild initiative they gave him head. They're just stickers. They're just stickers we're.
Speaker 2:We're, we're, we're going to say light me. Queen pulls out a giant flashlights Out of his trunk and he's able to just like pull arm it up and shine it to look around, but he blinds Mobius so he can't see. So I'm just gonna Say Line, there, we go up and he's able to see that Roy had a Old map that led to several important Owen areas in a lot of sex dungeons on this map. The only person who's not blind that notices it with lightning is john.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 1:So what do we do with this? We're gonna go to them, right?
Speaker 3:hey guys, a sex dungeons.
Speaker 1:Yeah, well, some of them are. This one here says uh, they're way to the statue of bleeding eyes.
Speaker 2:But you also see, there's some on there for uh but plugs anonymous.
Speaker 3:Oh, do you see? Right before the bleeding out statue where it says anus annihilators, because I don't know if I want to.
Speaker 1:That's on the way, though, right.
Speaker 5:I'm gonna be honest with you guys. I'm glad lightning McQueen blinded me now.
Speaker 3:I. This is a fucked up map man. I don't know what Roy was into, but this is Fuck.
Speaker 1:I mean he was leader of wheelchairs for the blind.
Speaker 5:So I feel like he's got yeah, I got some control over if you're making an organization called wheelchairs for the blind, you got some fucking deep-seated issues.
Speaker 3:If you have a map that says anus annihilators on it how do you think you can put in a wheelchair? You.
Speaker 5:Oh, the asshole annihilated them.
Speaker 4:Goddamnit, that makes sense.
Speaker 1:Wow, you okay, murky.
Speaker 5:It's a can of them bet you can't stop you can't intervene.
Speaker 3:Oh.
Speaker 5:My god. He is just so disappointed in all of us.
Speaker 1:Oh, he's still laughing.
Speaker 3:Coco's laugh is feeling. My God. Someone hit a gas line and it's.
Speaker 1:Okay, so we know why the people were always in the wheelchair got it Okay.
Speaker 2:Yeah you, you discovered the can of event.
Speaker 3:That was a secret achievement, wow.
Speaker 1:Oh, oh man, I'm so happy the soundboards back. Okay, I'm good, I'm good, murky, you good sure yeah, yeah, I'm okay Fucking ass blasters. You hassle. You started me back up.
Speaker 2:Oh, fuck me.
Speaker 3:It was at this moment that he knew he fucked up.
Speaker 5:Oh, all right, so um where are we going?
Speaker 1:I would say like my name McQueen.
Speaker 3:We should avoid anus annihilators.
Speaker 1:Yeah well, on the other side of that is fucking butthole blowers.
Speaker 5:Wait, where's your bride? Or your, your lady friend?
Speaker 1:We fuck them into the fucking left.
Speaker 3:That kid's not coming back, that kid's not going to be here for eight months. We need to figure this shit out so I can start preparing for this.
Speaker 1:Put it on our trunk, and I did just disappeared into the trunk dimension.
Speaker 3:No, they're back at the fucking wedding. Where the fuck we were at General area. They're all from the same area.
Speaker 1:It says here on the map that the wedding was right next to anal destroyers.
Speaker 5:John, there's something you want to tell, Something you want to tell us. John, is there a reason you don't want to go in that room? Listen, we're all in here. Can't be honest with yourself. Who can you be honest with?
Speaker 3:I don't know what you're talking about and I'm just going to say wow, I can't believe you would think that that's exciting for throwing them in the trunk.
Speaker 1:All right, we're going to. We're going to take John and I'm in the fucking trunk.
Speaker 2:All right, so you're moving to the trunk. Yeah.
Speaker 1:We're going to keep the dog in the car, though.
Speaker 5:OK, that's fair, we're going to get the dog to help us too?
Speaker 1:Yeah, the dog's going to help us in the trunk.
Speaker 2:John, do you want to be in the trunk?
Speaker 3:There's a lot of booze in there still, I don't want to be in the trunk.
Speaker 5:We should take the booze out.
Speaker 1:Yeah, we should take the booze out.
Speaker 5:I'm sober up, think about what he's doing right now. Let's take the booze out, then we'll try to bring all into the trunk.
Speaker 1:Well, I guess, while this is happening, we're. What's the point on the map that we're going to? Because I made up the one about the. It says right here this is the way we need to go. Unless that's unless that's cannon now.
Speaker 2:It's cannon now.
Speaker 1:All right, so I'm just going to start driving towards that point and trying to avoid the anal destruction of the butthole blowers and the penis twisters.
Speaker 4:The sounders the sounders the swizzle sticks the swizzle.
Speaker 1:Oh God, I fucking. I don't have diggity do's or daily doubts, Fucking. So I'm just going to drive there and I guess we're going to be talking the whole way there about fucking throwing John in the trunk.
Speaker 2:You know what? John roll me a fight check.
Speaker 4:I want to see, if you can so, what happens if he goes in the trunk if it's bottomless, who knows?
Speaker 1:Who knows, we'll find out. This isn't for Roy.
Speaker 5:Where's Roy, you know, can roll back time if something bad happens or is in the back seat.
Speaker 1:Yeah, Zeno can roll back to two. He's passed out right now.
Speaker 3:I roll a five, I'm going to use a wow, wow, you fucking bitch. I'm going to fucking punch the shit out of Mobius right Is God damn.
Speaker 1:Before he does that, I'm going to hit the gas as fast as I can. I'm going to use a run check.
Speaker 3:I used a wow. Yeah, I'm going to counter it with a fucking. I wrote a 12.
Speaker 1:I run check you asshole, Fuck you I countered you with a 12.
Speaker 3:How do you fucking counter a wow?
Speaker 1:I'm going to use a 12 to beat your while on a five. You know my drinking is extraction.
Speaker 3:I feel like the while verse while takes another role.
Speaker 5:I feel like you should shut the fuck up Owen, master what he's just drinking straight.
Speaker 1:He's sick of our shit. All right, Owen master, what's the call here? What's the call? I mean just going to let his stick.
Speaker 2:So here's how I'm imagining it. The wow was to not get put into the trunk. So, ok, he was not put into the trunk. He did punch Mobius, as requested. Mobius takes one damage. However, after hearing the commotion, lightning, mcqueen, with his critical role, turns around, slams into John. John takes one damage. John, they're inside of the hood of his yeah.
Speaker 1:I thought we were all inside. Did I fuck myself?
Speaker 2:Oh, hold on, I thought they were outside, that's, he was putting John into the trunk, or was he? What's happening?
Speaker 5:here, I thought we were going to try to put John in the trunk.
Speaker 1:I thought we were driving my bad.
Speaker 5:No, that's not right. We were probably putting John in the truck. We're probably outside.
Speaker 3:Got it. Probably I'm an alcohol. I was right close to the booze.
Speaker 1:I fucking backed up into it so hard that he fucking fell in my trunk.
Speaker 2:All right. So he takes a thing of damage and he falls into your truck. I'm in your trunk and get fucked.
Speaker 1:Too bad, he's next to all like in there. Hey, what's it like in there? Describe it for me.
Speaker 3:It's a giant black void and, yes, blasters in there. You think you hear your voices in the distance. So it's. There's none, though, it's only you and the booze.
Speaker 1:How's Betty doing?
Speaker 3:You and the liquor and the liquors in control. Now we took the liquor out. All you pieces of shit.
Speaker 1:So, he's the only thing in my ass right now, got it.
Speaker 5:Right, well, I'll leave him in there for like five minutes, so I'm thinking about what he's got.
Speaker 3:Well, there's ammunition and I have a gun. What are you going to do? Shoot him. If I, if I shoot upwards into the endless void, does it eventually reach Lightning Queen's trunk?
Speaker 2:Eventually. But it got to remember it's kind of going through like an infinite amount of universes. So it could possibly hit him.
Speaker 1:could hit another Lightning McQueen, You're going to fucking shoot up and like fucking three sessions later, a bullet's going to come on my ass all and kill somebody.
Speaker 5:You're going to shoot it up and it's going to rewrite Disney, pixar's cars and Lightning McQueen's ass is just going to have a bunch of bullet holes in it halfway through the movie and it's not going to be explained at all. Put the fucking cars in the hood and say that Cars in the hood, oh my God.
Speaker 3:Oh, because I drank so much, I want to stick my finger down my throat and just try to throw up, like waterfall style, hard as fuck into the void. So eventually it will reach a Lightning McQueen. What do you want me to roll for that?
Speaker 1:I can't wait for him to roll a one and fucking throw up on himself.
Speaker 2:So explain to me again what you're trying to do here.
Speaker 1:He wants to throw up and then have it go into, like another good person, that's going to be a constitution check, so you're going to have to roll me a charm.
Speaker 2:But keep in mind, you're drunk, so you need to roll twice, twice, but I get plus two on both.
Speaker 1:You should make him take the higher, you get plus two on both.
Speaker 3:Correct, I rolled a two, I rolled a seven, all right.
Speaker 2:So we're going to go with the two, because that means even with the plus two it's a four. That's a failed constitution check. So you just straight up vomit profusely all over myself, or just all over the board. Why are you everywhere within this void?
Speaker 3:Is there some kind of pride I can feeling knowing that a Lightning McQueen guy hit by some of my puke somewhere?
Speaker 1:You see, with that car cleaner floating by you in the in the own verse, and it sucks up the vomit. You didn't think I came prepared.
Speaker 4:All right.
Speaker 1:I'm going to have to dip up guys, that's all right, john.
Speaker 3:That's right. And now we're going to pass out. Yeah, we're always sleeping. I'm fucking stuck in a trunk with throw up all over me.
Speaker 1:I'm is, I'm is. But that is that an hour and a half. So we'll leave it there with murky stuck in the trunk and we'll come back in 12 episodes and maybe do it again.
Speaker 4:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Take notes.
Speaker 5:Don't we have bar. Do like episode recap to your like.
Speaker 1:We'll have the cohost processor.
Speaker 5:I think we're here with you.
Speaker 1:Which is something I play, I pay for it, that's 30 additional dollars a month to do that. That's amazing. I need I think, I think, here at the end of this month, I need $36 from each of you guys. I think that's the full rotation I haven't been keeping track.
Speaker 5:I just give you money when you told me you need money.
Speaker 3:Yeah Right, that gives me an excuse to.
Speaker 5:I'm not that kind of fucking person.
Speaker 1:John is stuck in lightning's trunk of evidence base Owens on the way to bleeding eye statue. What about Bard has to say about this? Ask Bard to give us a summary and then we'll exit the episode. No, we're still recording.
Speaker 2:Hell yeah, don't say anything. Racist.
Speaker 3:I wouldn't do Zenos racist, that's, that's all right. He wasn't here for that episode, where he was racist Right?
Speaker 1:No, I was racist.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you were racist for an episode that you weren't here, yeah
Speaker 3:because the sound, because I've never been racist. Yeah, the sound board didn't go up in that episode and you were the only change, so we were just like.
Speaker 1:I guess you know must have been the racist one.
Speaker 2:So Try to that's hilarious.
Speaker 3:This is on you, be your Looking good though it looked great when you had ice cream in it, I think it's a good idea.
Speaker 1:It looked great when you had ice cream in it.
Speaker 5:It can look that way again, baby boy.
Speaker 3:Oh, all right, I'm sorry you try to turn Finish. I turned cocoa to a sugar daddy for ice cream right now.
Speaker 5:If it works, it works.
Speaker 1:If it works, it works. I like that. I'm very curious to see what Bard says before we go. You okay.
Speaker 5:Yeah, I'm not. Sounds like you got another one.
Speaker 1:Sounds like you have something else coming, maybe a poop, maybe a poop. I'm Mark, is playing Russian fishing for. Hey, yes, yeah, playing the fuck out of it, fucking weirdo.
Speaker 5:I've been catching you can't read anything that's going on, but no, I can't read normally.
Speaker 3:I can't read normally. No, I can't.
Speaker 4:I can't read normally.
Speaker 3:I can't read All those lines and that you do and call them numbers and letters and stuff. You think that means anything to me?
Speaker 4:Hell. No, wow, wow.
Speaker 1:Wow, I'm so happy I added that in the middle of the episode to my soundboard.
Speaker 2:All right, sucky hey.
Speaker 1:Let's see what it has to say, for the summary is thinking I was thinking it's going to take a while.
Speaker 2:All right. John is stuck in Lightning McQueen's trunk of evidence space. He is going to be there for days and he is going to start losing hope. Oh no I tried to do everything to escape, but nothing will work.
Speaker 1:He's going to get out of it.
Speaker 2:He's going to start thinking that he's going to be trapped there forever. Meanwhile, roy O'Bannon, agent Mobius and Lightning McQueen are on their way to the bleeding eye statue of Owen Wilson. They believe that the statue will lead them to the true Owen of this post-apocalyptic world. As they were driving, they come across a group of bandits, and the bandits stopped them and demanded Lightning McQueen.
Speaker 1:I think you should make that as a note, because that's canon. Now they're trying to steal you. That's where we're going to pick up next time. The bandits are trying to steal me. That's a I feel like I feel like anything the I said after that's probably moot Like we shouldn't fucking say that we just so we're going to meet bandits next time. Got it Correct.
Speaker 2:All right.
Speaker 1:Don't forget to keep the other note where fucking he's still in my fucking trunk. We're going to open it. It's going to be 30 minutes later, but because he's in a different, like pocket dimension universe, time moves faster in that universe, so like 30 minutes of our time is like. Or time moves slower, so like 30 minutes of our time is like fucking years. He comes out with like a full fucking beard fucking down to his goddamn ballsack.
Speaker 3:It would let me die from hunger or thirst. It was awful.
Speaker 1:Every now and then a box of cheese that's came by. So that's the episode. Bye everybody.